I don't think there is any burden that comes with love. Some people conflate love with lust. After the lustful phase, they get bored of their partner because the connection was missing, then it becomes a burden to maintain the relationship.

Reply 5

Old Skool Freak

Original post by Anonymous

I want love but also fear the burden that comes with love, especially when it becomes a romantic relationship.

Is it normal?

It's not uncommon... venturing into the unknown is always a bit of a scary prospect. But you know what? You miss 100% of the shots you don't take.

What are the specific "burdens" you're referring to? Is it being answerable to someone else? Not having the freedom to flirt with others?... or that they'll hurt you one day? In any case, sometimes you've got to just bite the bullet and go for it. Remember any choice you make is 1/2 chance... sometimes you're the pigeon, sometimes you're the statue. I understand that when you're single, it's can be a lonesome but safe experience... however, the people who get ahead in life are those who take chances, and risk "failure"... the key is to anticipate what may go wrong and have a recovery plan (I'm sure you've worried about other things in the past, but ended up doing them anyway... how many times has it gone as badly as you feared? Even if it did, you recovered didn't you?!?)

You know who / what you remind me of? A diver who's standing on a high platform about to take a dive in the pool... all sorts of thoughts and nerves going through your mind etc. etc. You know what? Just jump and deal with whatever happens.

Not sure if you've seen / heard this song, but it may help you get some perspective?

Reply 6

Anonymous #1

Original post by Wired_1800

Yes, indeed.

Reply 7

SmileAndWaveBoys

Original post by Anonymous

I want love but also fear the burden that comes with love, especially when it becomes a romantic relationship.

Is it normal?

Absolutely. Relationships can be both the best thing and the scariest. You're being very vulnerable with someone, whilst also feeling so much love and adoration. Try to not view it as a burden, as that's very negative and could impact your relationship in ways you don't want.

Completely normal.

Original post by Kathy89

Completely normal.

I have never dated in my 26 years of life.

Reply 10

SomeonesDad

It's only by opening up yourself to the possibility of rejection and failure that you also open the door to the opportunity and hope for success.
It hurts when it doesn't work out "forever" but when it does, there's nothing else like it. Centuries worth of poetry and literature will tell you that in all communities and in all locations around the world, this is true.
I'm a sucker for a classic RomCom. One of my favourites is Notting Hill when the Julia Roberts character wants to try and make it up to Hugh Grant's and asks for a second chance, "... I'm also just a girl, standing in front of a boy, asking him to love her...." and he says No because he doesn't want to go through the pain again. Very well observed.

Reply 11

Anonymous #3

I'd like a relationship but I'd hate any of the things I'd need to get or maintain one.

Reply 12

Anonymous #1

Original post by Anonymous

I'd like a relationship but I'd hate any of the things I'd need to get or maintain one.

Makes sense. I share pretty much the same thought as you.

Reply 13

Anonymous #1

Life is tough though.

Reply 14

Oscar Gibbons

Go from one lust to the next, don't think so deep.

Reply 15

Anonymous #1

Original post by Oscar Gibbons

Go from one lust to the next, don't think so deep.

I am afraid that it is easier said than done, though I would try my best. Thank you so much for your advice.

Reply 16

StriderHort

Pretty normal, a lot of it can be scary especially when your life is uncomplicated and living in desire. But you need to take those risks to get anything of value in return.