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good chat up line

I see the same girl every morning at the bus station and I want to approach her but the only thing I know about her is she works in the same area as me and she lives in the same area as me and she gets the same bus every morning as me. I really want to come across as confident but I dont know how to break the ice with her, I have smiled at her and she does smile back but I dont know how to break the ice with her. I was thinking of saying 'do you work at ....' if she says no i dont work there then i can laugh it off and say i recognise you from somewhere where do you work? '

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Reply 1
You have to be sensitive as approaching strangers going about their everyday routine can be unwelcome. I wouldn’t make an obvious dating approach or lead with a question about where she works. However a reciprocated smile suggests there’d be no harm in a ‘hello, how are doing?’ to see if she is interested to talk. From there you can then give your name, ask hers and then get in to sharing a few more details
Original post by Zarek
You have to be sensitive as approaching strangers going about their everyday routine can be unwelcome. I wouldn’t make an obvious dating approach or lead with a question about where she works. However a reciprocated smile suggests there’d be no harm in a ‘hello, how are doing?’ to see if she is interested to talk. From there you can then give your name, ask hers and then get in to sharing a few more details


How have you been getting on with this approach?
Have you converted any strangers to girlfriends?

Original post by Anonymous
I see the same girl every morning at the bus station and I want to approach her but the only thing I know about her is she works in the same area as me and she lives in the same area as me and she gets the same bus every morning as me. I really want to come across as confident but I dont know how to break the ice with her, I have smiled at her and she does smile back but I dont know how to break the ice with her. I was thinking of saying 'do you work at ....' if she says no i dont work there then i can laugh it off and say i recognise you from somewhere where do you work? '


The more you care about coming across as confident, the more likely you are to come across as unattractive.

Let go of caring about how confident you seem to her. Instead, accept whatever level of confidence you have. And treat this as a little personal experiment of yours. Where you talk to an attractive fellow passenger and see how you get on.

Don't think about what you will say to her. Rehearsing it over and over in your mind is a waste of your time. Attractive guys don't waste time. Being spontaneous and coming out with any old thing is fine. Any old thing with the right underlying frame will improve your chances of her being attracted to you.

There are entire training courses (including youtube video series) on cold approach.
Reply 3
Original post by Dunnig Kruger
How have you been getting on with this approach?
Have you converted any strangers to girlfriends?



The more you care about coming across as confident, the more likely you are to come across as unattractive.

Let go of caring about how confident you seem to her. Instead, accept whatever level of confidence you have. And treat this as a little personal experiment of yours. Where you talk to an attractive fellow passenger and see how you get on.

Don't think about what you will say to her. Rehearsing it over and over in your mind is a waste of your time. Attractive guys don't waste time. Being spontaneous and coming out with any old thing is fine. Any old thing with the right underlying frame will improve your chances of her being attracted to you.

There are entire training courses (including youtube video series) on cold approach.

Its not really a cold approach if you see the same person regularly and its something i go through everyday thinking how can i initiate convo in a public place? If a girl is interested then they wont mind being asked qiestiond about her work?
Original post by Anonymous
Its not really a cold approach if you see the same person regularly and its something i go through everyday thinking how can i initiate convo in a public place? If a girl is interested then they wont mind being asked qiestiond about her work?


I've successfully done this sort of thing multiple times, in various environments. I find a gradual approach often works far better than going in, all guns blazing. @Zarek has already given you the lowdown, but I'll try and expand on it a little.

So you say you already see this girl and you're getting friendly smiles etc. Next time, why not try saying a confident "Hi" or "Hey" on its own? Once you do that, after a few times, maybe take it up a notch with a simple "Hey, How's it going?" ... based on her response, you either leave the convo there or perhaps add some generic comment about the surroundings (e.g. "These busses never come when they're supposed to" or "The bus is always crowded, I hope we get seats this time" or "It's getting cold these days, I miss the summer already, and it's only gonna get worse" etc.) and see how she responds.

I find the best thing about these gradual approaches is, that if at any point, you don't get the "right" response, you'll know she's not interested... so you know not to push it. The other thing is, she will probably expect the two of you to talk at some point so this prepares her, rather than putting her on the spot (this can be a nightmare for a shy / introvert person). Also, she could be smiling for a number of reasons, so as it progresses, it'll become more obvious if it's because she likes you.

I would advise against asking personal questions about her work or her private life for now, until you've established a real rapport with her (from a girls perspective, any personal information is like cat-nip for a stalker).

Spoiler

(edited 3 months ago)
Reply 5
Original post by Old Skool Freak
I would advise AGAINST asking personal questions about her work or her private life for now, until you've established a real rapport with her (from a girls perspective, any personal information is like cat-nip for a stalker).

Corrected for you, as you missed out a crucial word.
Reply 6
I dont work with women my age and ive tried online but its just not for me as I prefer to meet people face to face hence why im trying to approach women who i see regularly but its difficult trying to initiate convo without coming across as too strong
You got no chance she won't listen to you
Original post by Surnia
Corrected for you, as you missed out a crucial word.


Cheers.... it's now officially corrected.

Guess I should've gone Specsavers :lol:
Original post by Anonymous
I dont work with women my age and ive tried online but its just not for me as I prefer to meet people face to face hence why im trying to approach women who i see regularly but its difficult trying to initiate convo without coming across as too strong


Well as I said, the approach I described normally works for me... and there's nothing wrong with wanting to meet people IRL; I'm exactly the same :smile:

And it's gradual, so as long as you're careful about the next step, you're unlikely to "come on too strong". The worst that can happen is that she lets you know (in one way or another) that she'd rather you didn't speak to her (this may also be changing her timetable, or waiting at another bus stop).
(edited 3 months ago)
Reply 10
Original post by Anonymous
I dont work with women my age and ive tried online but its just not for me as I prefer to meet people face to face hence why im trying to approach women who i see regularly but its difficult trying to initiate convo without coming across as too strong

Do activities where it's expected that you'll engage in conversation with women: volunteering, community work, hobbies, evening classes.
Reply 11
Original post by Zarek
You have to be sensitive as approaching strangers going about their everyday routine can be unwelcome. I wouldn’t make an obvious dating approach or lead with a question about where she works. However a reciprocated smile suggests there’d be no harm in a ‘hello, how are doing?’ to see if she is interested to talk. From there you can then give your name, ask hers and then get in to sharing a few more details

After all this time im still unable to make any sort of verbal contact with her and have bot even said hello. Its really getting me down as ivstill think shes interested (she keeps trying to sit near me and glances at me). If an opportunity ever presented itself would it be tactless to go straight in for a convo or should i just say hi for the time being?
Reply 12
Original post by Anonymous #1
After all this time im still unable to make any sort of verbal contact with her and have bot even said hello. Its really getting me down as ivstill think shes interested (she keeps trying to sit near me and glances at me). If an opportunity ever presented itself would it be tactless to go straight in for a convo or should i just say hi for the time being?

Just "Hi, how are you doing? I'm ....." works great. Maybe she is shy too, so a Hi and an introduction is enough to start something. Maybe she doesn't know how to start a conversation too. Just try it.
Reply 13
Original post by Kathy89
Just "Hi, how are you doing? I'm ....." works great. Maybe she is shy too, so a Hi and an introduction is enough to start something. Maybe she doesn't know how to start a conversation too. Just try it.

Yes but ive had no back and forth with her never said hello etc so will going in straight for a convo work?
Reply 14
Original post by Anonymous #1
I see the same girl every morning at the bus station and I want to approach her but the only thing I know about her is she works in the same area as me and she lives in the same area as me and she gets the same bus every morning as me. I really want to come across as confident but I dont know how to break the ice with her, I have smiled at her and she does smile back but I dont know how to break the ice with her. I was thinking of saying 'do you work at ....' if she says no i dont work there then i can laugh it off and say i recognise you from somewhere where do you work? '

brp use a rizz line
Reply 15
Original post by __IDK__
brp use a rizz line

whats a 'rizz' line?
Reply 16
Original post by Anonymous #1
I see the same girl every morning at the bus station and I want to approach her but the only thing I know about her is she works in the same area as me and she lives in the same area as me and she gets the same bus every morning as me. I really want to come across as confident but I dont know how to break the ice with her, I have smiled at her and she does smile back but I dont know how to break the ice with her. I was thinking of saying 'do you work at ....' if she says no i dont work there then i can laugh it off and say i recognise you from somewhere where do you work? '

imagone not havomng aa ting
Reply 17
Original post by Anonymous #1
whats a 'rizz' line?

like basivcally say "its abit cold today" can you warm me up, actually ur too hot" or "are u my mat, so i can postrate on u", or just go for the kiss man if u can tell shes going for it how old r u roghly
Reply 18
Original post by __IDK__
like basivcally say "its abit cold today" can you warm me up, actually ur too hot" or "are u my mat, so i can postrate on u", or just go for the kiss man if u can tell shes going for it how old r u roghly

mid 20s
Reply 19
Original post by __IDK__
like basivcally say "its abit cold today" can you warm me up, actually ur too hot" or "are u my mat, so i can postrate on u", or just go for the kiss man if u can tell shes going for it how old r u roghly

erm no i dont think thats going to work

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