Advice for Year 13 with no friends
Recently I started year 13 (17M) and I still haven't made any friends. There's a couple of people who I'm friendly to but we only wave or say hi when we see each other around.
I've been in this position since starting college last year. Since summer 2022, everything has felt like a blur but it's also been the most difficult period of my life having this kind of deep loneliness. I keep thinking I'm in some kind of dream and I'm gonna wake up and none of this has actually happened. Starting college, I didn't really know anyone as most people who went to my secondary stayed on for sixth form, but I knew I wanted a new start somewhere else.
For most of year 12 I spent most of my free periods and break times studying or eating lunch alone, which feels shameful to admit. There's some advice in places about giving up and just focusing on your studying but this doesn't seem a good idea as you just want someone to hang out with, make memories with, experience growing up etc. Plus I know I can't ignore this as I think about it all the time and it really consumes you. The few people I have met at extra curricular things have seemed surprised when I said I don't really hang out with anyone.
Despite this I've been trying to keep going and doing things on my own for at least some comfort, like going to the gym, bike rides, self-improvement as much as I can including in the summer that's just passed. However the reality is that this is going to just keep going on unless I break out of it, but I feel so helpless.
Has anyone been in any similar situations and got any advice? Thank you so much.
I've been in this position since starting college last year. Since summer 2022, everything has felt like a blur but it's also been the most difficult period of my life having this kind of deep loneliness. I keep thinking I'm in some kind of dream and I'm gonna wake up and none of this has actually happened. Starting college, I didn't really know anyone as most people who went to my secondary stayed on for sixth form, but I knew I wanted a new start somewhere else.
For most of year 12 I spent most of my free periods and break times studying or eating lunch alone, which feels shameful to admit. There's some advice in places about giving up and just focusing on your studying but this doesn't seem a good idea as you just want someone to hang out with, make memories with, experience growing up etc. Plus I know I can't ignore this as I think about it all the time and it really consumes you. The few people I have met at extra curricular things have seemed surprised when I said I don't really hang out with anyone.
Despite this I've been trying to keep going and doing things on my own for at least some comfort, like going to the gym, bike rides, self-improvement as much as I can including in the summer that's just passed. However the reality is that this is going to just keep going on unless I break out of it, but I feel so helpless.
Has anyone been in any similar situations and got any advice? Thank you so much.
yep..honestly dont worry about it. ur in ur last year and uni/work is right around the corner. if you haven't made friends you will later on. suck it up for now which is what I did. I had a couple people when I was in yr 13 but they werent ppl I'd call friends..honeslty id rather of been alone bcs the fake laughing and pretending to enjoy conversations were so hard and a harder habit to get out of. we just werent compatible but I did what I had to do..idk? post covid was also a blur for me but you'll find ppl in uni and you can be a better and different vers of yourself. not sure if this will help but I hope it did
Original post by Zarazara11
yep..honestly dont worry about it. ur in ur last year and uni/work is right around the corner. if you haven't made friends you will later on. suck it up for now which is what I did. I had a couple people when I was in yr 13 but they werent ppl I'd call friends..honeslty id rather of been alone bcs the fake laughing and pretending to enjoy conversations were so hard and a harder habit to get out of. we just werent compatible but I did what I had to do..idk? post covid was also a blur for me but you'll find ppl in uni and you can be a better and different vers of yourself. not sure if this will help but I hope it did
Thank you for replying. I get your point about uni being a new start and there being a whole lot of potential but it’s just under a year away and I don’t think I can deal with having nobody for that long, incl. turning 18 and the next summer etc
Original post by user2813
hiii i completely understand you, you’re amazing for getting past year 12 alone and it’s so hard, keep going because year 13 is the end, i’m sure you’re busy with applications rn too, if you need someone to talk to i’d be glad to listen !
Thank you so much.
I'll be honest, every day of the later parts of year 12 just felt like a survival mission. I don't know what kept me going but I think it was just me turning up and wanting to be there thinking I might have a chance of making friends, despite having little confidence though and it not working out. I don't know what my chances of making friends this year will be but I know I gotta escape the comfort zone somehow.
i would look at friends outside of college, I'm in a kinda similar position this year, I ended up just making a few friends outside college, its not quite the same but its at least a bit better, you could start of by offering your class mates help with the work, and just try to speak to like minded people, friends come from the places you least expect them thou. for making friends outside of college, once your 18 using like dating apps is always a quick way to get to know people and have fun lol, as well as clubbing. but try to reconnect with any friends you've had in the past they might be able to introduce you to others, get into some parties that kinda thing. if your near bristol hit me up
Original post by Anonymous
Recently I started year 13 (17M) and I still haven't made any friends. There's a couple of people who I'm friendly to but we only wave or say hi when we see each other around.
I've been in this position since starting college last year. Since summer 2022, everything has felt like a blur but it's also been the most difficult period of my life having this kind of deep loneliness. I keep thinking I'm in some kind of dream and I'm gonna wake up and none of this has actually happened. Starting college, I didn't really know anyone as most people who went to my secondary stayed on for sixth form, but I knew I wanted a new start somewhere else.
For most of year 12 I spent most of my free periods and break times studying or eating lunch alone, which feels shameful to admit. There's some advice in places about giving up and just focusing on your studying but this doesn't seem a good idea as you just want someone to hang out with, make memories with, experience growing up etc. Plus I know I can't ignore this as I think about it all the time and it really consumes you. The few people I have met at extra curricular things have seemed surprised when I said I don't really hang out with anyone.
Despite this I've been trying to keep going and doing things on my own for at least some comfort, like going to the gym, bike rides, self-improvement as much as I can including in the summer that's just passed. However the reality is that this is going to just keep going on unless I break out of it, but I feel so helpless.
Has anyone been in any similar situations and got any advice? Thank you so much.
I've been in this position since starting college last year. Since summer 2022, everything has felt like a blur but it's also been the most difficult period of my life having this kind of deep loneliness. I keep thinking I'm in some kind of dream and I'm gonna wake up and none of this has actually happened. Starting college, I didn't really know anyone as most people who went to my secondary stayed on for sixth form, but I knew I wanted a new start somewhere else.
For most of year 12 I spent most of my free periods and break times studying or eating lunch alone, which feels shameful to admit. There's some advice in places about giving up and just focusing on your studying but this doesn't seem a good idea as you just want someone to hang out with, make memories with, experience growing up etc. Plus I know I can't ignore this as I think about it all the time and it really consumes you. The few people I have met at extra curricular things have seemed surprised when I said I don't really hang out with anyone.
Despite this I've been trying to keep going and doing things on my own for at least some comfort, like going to the gym, bike rides, self-improvement as much as I can including in the summer that's just passed. However the reality is that this is going to just keep going on unless I break out of it, but I feel so helpless.
Has anyone been in any similar situations and got any advice? Thank you so much.
i understand man, i planned to transfer colleges so never made friends but ended up staying, so have gone a year and a bit without proper friends, just a few people i am friendly with.
honestly you just have to keep going. get your a levels done and in uni join societies to make friends with common interests.
i have to say though, it was pretty depressing celebrating my 18th alone, but i found reaching out to old friends helped a bit. see if any of your secondary school friends would like to stay in touch maybe.
joining discord servers could help too, there’s always people online there to talk to about whatever things you like
and see if there are any clubs near where you live, like music or gym
Original post by user2813
you seem like a lovely person and anyone who isn’t friends with you is missing out, please keep your head and confidence up, people will come to you definitely, you don’t want to make friends with the wrong people. focus on the future because year 13 rn is tough, good luck !
Thank you so much, it means a lot. I’m just gonna keep going. There’s no way I can just stop now on trying
Original post by Zarazara11
yep..honestly dont worry about it. ur in ur last year and uni/work is right around the corner. if you haven't made friends you will later on. suck it up for now which is what I did. I had a couple people when I was in yr 13 but they werent ppl I'd call friends..honeslty id rather of been alone bcs the fake laughing and pretending to enjoy conversations were so hard and a harder habit to get out of. we just werent compatible but I did what I had to do..idk? post covid was also a blur for me but you'll find ppl in uni and you can be a better and different vers of yourself. not sure if this will help but I hope it did
hi i know i'm late to this, but if it makes you feel better i am also in the same situation right now
Original post by Anonymous #1
Recently I started year 13 (17M) and I still haven't made any friends. There's a couple of people who I'm friendly to but we only wave or say hi when we see each other around.
I've been in this position since starting college last year. Since summer 2022, everything has felt like a blur but it's also been the most difficult period of my life having this kind of deep loneliness. I keep thinking I'm in some kind of dream and I'm gonna wake up and none of this has actually happened. Starting college, I didn't really know anyone as most people who went to my secondary stayed on for sixth form, but I knew I wanted a new start somewhere else.
For most of year 12 I spent most of my free periods and break times studying or eating lunch alone, which feels shameful to admit. There's some advice in places about giving up and just focusing on your studying but this doesn't seem a good idea as you just want someone to hang out with, make memories with, experience growing up etc. Plus I know I can't ignore this as I think about it all the time and it really consumes you. The few people I have met at extra curricular things have seemed surprised when I said I don't really hang out with anyone.
Despite this I've been trying to keep going and doing things on my own for at least some comfort, like going to the gym, bike rides, self-improvement as much as I can including in the summer that's just passed. However the reality is that this is going to just keep going on unless I break out of it, but I feel so helpless.
Has anyone been in any similar situations and got any advice? Thank you so much.
I've been in this position since starting college last year. Since summer 2022, everything has felt like a blur but it's also been the most difficult period of my life having this kind of deep loneliness. I keep thinking I'm in some kind of dream and I'm gonna wake up and none of this has actually happened. Starting college, I didn't really know anyone as most people who went to my secondary stayed on for sixth form, but I knew I wanted a new start somewhere else.
For most of year 12 I spent most of my free periods and break times studying or eating lunch alone, which feels shameful to admit. There's some advice in places about giving up and just focusing on your studying but this doesn't seem a good idea as you just want someone to hang out with, make memories with, experience growing up etc. Plus I know I can't ignore this as I think about it all the time and it really consumes you. The few people I have met at extra curricular things have seemed surprised when I said I don't really hang out with anyone.
Despite this I've been trying to keep going and doing things on my own for at least some comfort, like going to the gym, bike rides, self-improvement as much as I can including in the summer that's just passed. However the reality is that this is going to just keep going on unless I break out of it, but I feel so helpless.
Has anyone been in any similar situations and got any advice? Thank you so much.
i'm in a similar situation except that i'm in year 12, dropped toxic friends and now i'm by myself. my advice is that maybe you could reach out to your old friends or make friends online. you're in your last year before you go off to uni so don't worry if you don't make any friends in year 13, you will be able to make friends in uni and i believe that you can do it
)Original post by ilovejeongin143
i'm in a similar situation except that i'm in year 12, dropped toxic friends and now i'm by myself. my advice is that maybe you could reach out to your old friends or make friends online. you're in your last year before you go off to uni so don't worry if you don't make any friends in year 13, you will be able to make friends in uni and i believe that you can do it )
)i'm in exact same position rn! alone after dropping toxic friends and them being passive aggressive to me and having a lot of fun without me
Original post by ilovejeongin143
i'm in a similar situation except that i'm in year 12, dropped toxic friends and now i'm by myself. my advice is that maybe you could reach out to your old friends or make friends online. you're in your last year before you go off to uni so don't worry if you don't make any friends in year 13, you will be able to make friends in uni and i believe that you can do it )
)how are you doing now? i only have two friends at school currently, and i'm in the same situation as you - i feel lonely a lot at school
Original post by Zarazara11
yep..honestly dont worry about it. ur in ur last year and uni/work is right around the corner. if you haven't made friends you will later on. suck it up for now which is what I did. I had a couple people when I was in yr 13 but they werent ppl I'd call friends..honeslty id rather of been alone bcs the fake laughing and pretending to enjoy conversations were so hard and a harder habit to get out of. we just werent compatible but I did what I had to do..idk? post covid was also a blur for me but you'll find ppl in uni and you can be a better and different vers of yourself. not sure if this will help but I hope it did
Are you me? 🤣🤣literally the same situation. In uni now and have found some close friends who are keepers 💖
Original post by varsh_xx
i'm in exact same position rn! alone after dropping toxic friends and them being passive aggressive to me and having a lot of fun without me
it's okay, you'll always be able to make new friends
Original post by varsh_xx
how are you doing now? i only have two friends at school currently, and i'm in the same situation as you - i feel lonely a lot at school
eh, im doing okay 🤷🏻*♀️🤷🏻*♀️ i do occasionally talk with a few people in my year group (year 12) but i'm still usually by myself. me and my ex best friend even make eye contact with each other on accident sometimes and i honestly just don't care. she's still talking about me whilst i've moved on.
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