Has love become an obligation?
Poll
Has love become an obligation?
Simple question. It seems that people rush into relationships because they're lonely, not in love. So, has love become a social responsibility?
You don't have to be in love per se in order to start a relationship.
Original post by Munchies-YumYum
You don't have to be in love per se in order to start a relationship.
That's the problem with many relationships. They don't last because the parties involved are not emotionally compatible. I may sound old-fashioned, but I don't see why people go into relationships if they don't have strong feelings for each other. If it's just for the physical side of things, then stay **** buddies.
I kind of agree. A lot of people seem to force feelings for each other, or profess to have them.
I certainly know some people who throw themselves into whirlwind 6-12 month romances, get massively invested for the term of the relationship, and then get over it within a few weeks of breaking up.
I certainly know some people who throw themselves into whirlwind 6-12 month romances, get massively invested for the term of the relationship, and then get over it within a few weeks of breaking up.
Original post by TaylorGang_4
That's the problem with many relationships. They don't last because the parties involved are not emotionally compatible. I may sound old-fashioned, but I don't see why people go into relationships if they don't have strong feelings for each other. If it's just for the physical side of things, then stay **** buddies.
Not at all. It was quite common back in the day to 'get with' other people due to political reasons, arranged marriages, money, family etc etc. The behavior described is probably just as 'old fashioned' as the whole concept of dating due to love.
I wouldnt say it has become an obligation. But to me it seems with most people I have seen. It is, the do things in relationship because they are supposed to and its what is expected. Rather than because they want to.
Posted from TSR Mobile
Posted from TSR Mobile
Personally I wouldn't get with someone that I didn't think I could ever love but not all relationships turn into love. I don't feel like I HAVE to be in a relationship (I'm often happier when I'm not) but at the same time if I meet someone I like I feel like I have to give them a chance, I would struggle to do that if they were single and dating other people. I guess what I'm saying is I couldn't get to know a guy if I felt like I was "competing" with other women.
(edited 11 years ago)
It's not an obligation by society, but rather a personal need that they would rather delude themselves in order to fulfill. No one forces anyone to get into relationships.
Although I do think that a taboo on sex still exists (especially for women) that makes us prefer to only have sex within relationships rather than outside of them, so we feel less trashy.
Although I do think that a taboo on sex still exists (especially for women) that makes us prefer to only have sex within relationships rather than outside of them, so we feel less trashy.
I think a lot of people who go into relationships without much feeling are just people who feel like they need to be in a relationship in order to be happy, and so will convince themselves that they are in love to validate their relationship when they actually aren't. I don't think being in a relationship is a societal obligation nowadays; in the past there would have been pressure to find someone to marry at a young age but that pressure doesn't exist for most of us now.
As for going into a relationship with someone you don't love...I don't think you have to be in love with someone at the very start of a relationship. I know that when I met my boyfriend, I was attracted to him and I knew I liked him an awful lot and wanted to get to know him better, but love didn't cross my mind until a few months later when I realised that our relationship had shifted from one of intense like to one of intense love. Although I suppose I knew I did feel something for him romantically when we started going out, it wasn't love at the time; love took time to develop. I think you have to know someone quite well to be able to say you love them or are in love with them, and if you don't feel that after a certain amount of time, it's probably just not meant to be.
As for going into a relationship with someone you don't love...I don't think you have to be in love with someone at the very start of a relationship. I know that when I met my boyfriend, I was attracted to him and I knew I liked him an awful lot and wanted to get to know him better, but love didn't cross my mind until a few months later when I realised that our relationship had shifted from one of intense like to one of intense love. Although I suppose I knew I did feel something for him romantically when we started going out, it wasn't love at the time; love took time to develop. I think you have to know someone quite well to be able to say you love them or are in love with them, and if you don't feel that after a certain amount of time, it's probably just not meant to be.
(edited 11 years ago)
Original post by TaylorGang_4
That's the problem with many relationships. They don't last because the parties involved are not emotionally compatible. I may sound old-fashioned, but I don't see why people go into relationships if they don't have strong feelings for each other. If it's just for the physical side of things, then stay **** buddies.
That isn't old fashioned, it's the opposite. In the old days it would be "you're getting on abit, a nice nineteen year old girl really should be married...". Suggesting people should stay **** buddies is hardly Victorian style thinking!
There are obviously people who are desperate for a relationship, so will try to force feelings. I did the opposite, I wanted to stay single so tried at first to keep things causal.
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