Original post by winterscomingIt sounds to me like you've just never managed to find the kind of deeper connection which grows over time as you really get to know someone. If you haven't had the chance to experience a real meaningful connection with anyone yet, don't worry, it'll happen eventually, but it's not going to appear out of nowhere. Obviously you can't force something out of nothing, but both sides do actually need to make an effort, be patient with the other, and actually really want it to work.
Don't try to over-think it or see it as a problem. It might be because they're not that into you, or maybe it's because you're just not that into them, or perhaps you think you want a relationship but actually you're still having fun just meeting people and dating, and you just don't want to settle for somebody just yet given that there are so many other people out there who might be better for you. It doesn't matter the reason why, all that matters is that you know it's not working out, and there's no point beating yourself up about it, or wondering if there's something wrong with you - you've got your own life to live, so live it and don't dwell on the relationships which didn't work out.
If you're worried that you're being too picky, or searching for the impossible, just remember that there's a huge difference between wanting a relationship and really wanting to be with someone so much that you'll both put in the effort needed to make it work - this doesn't happen often because it takes a lot of time and patience; you need to want that person enough that you can deal with the highs and lows, the personality quirks, the annoying habits, etc.
Just think how many years you've known your best friend, all the stuff you've done together, and how hard you'd find it to replace him/her in your life - until you've got that kind of connection with a partner, then you probably haven't met "the right one" yet.
When it does happen, you'll really know about it because that person will be a potential life-long partner who you'd actually seriously be considering spending the rest of your days with, All the things about them which annoy you will just stop bothering you, and you'll most likely even start to find those quirks attractive because it's their 'true' personality shining through - i.e. the flaws and faults in your partner which nobody else really notices, and nobody else appreciates or understands about them quite the way that you do.
Until then, just accept that it's going to happen with nearly all of your future dates (if you're lucky, it will happen with all but one). By the way, guys go through exactly the same thing after dating a few months, we're just as likely to lose interest, or decide that she's not really worth the effort, or end up more interested in somebody else, or just figure that life is easier without being joined at the hip with somebody.