My parents treat me like a maid (almost)
So I do love my parents but they call me and my siblings sooo much. I may seem spoilt but i'm not exaggerating. My Mum hasn't cooked or done anything chore related in over 7 years and I have 5 siblings and i'm 16. We do everything- all the chores, cleaning and making them everything whilst they sit around (it's summer). I just want to know if it's normal because i'm just trying to watch an episode of a series and my name is called endlessly to: turn on the fan, make tea, get headphones, get phone, make food... and it's almost as if they do absolutely nothing (and sometimes I don't even get a thank you hwhbhjs). They are also always complaining. For example they ask me what i'm doing and i say watch Friends and then they threaten blocking my internet??? It's summer and I've finished my exams what else am i supposed to do? And then when I tell them what else am I supposed to do they say something like: "so you didn't see I finished my food and you couldn't take the tray back," whilst they sit and watch T.V. Every time I sit my name gets called on average 10-20 minutes later to do something they can easily do themselves.
I just want to know if it is normal.
I just want to know if it is normal.
No, my dear, it isn’t normal. You are the responsibility of your parents as are your siblings and not vice versa. This behaviour on the part of your parents constitutes neglect and abuse.
There is a line between children mucking in and doing some chores and being expected to wait hand and foot on parents who should be carrying out their parental responsilities. I had 7 children and everyone had chores they had to do for their pocket money, but they were geared to their age and maturity and we worked as a team and it worked very well. Children need time to themselves to grow and develop and enjoy growing up so that they grow into rounded adults. You are still at 16 and your siblings are not your responsibilities.
You need to speak to your parents and tell them that this can’t continue. If they won’t listen, then you either refuse to do what you are doing or go to the authorities.
There is a line between children mucking in and doing some chores and being expected to wait hand and foot on parents who should be carrying out their parental responsilities. I had 7 children and everyone had chores they had to do for their pocket money, but they were geared to their age and maturity and we worked as a team and it worked very well. Children need time to themselves to grow and develop and enjoy growing up so that they grow into rounded adults. You are still at 16 and your siblings are not your responsibilities.
You need to speak to your parents and tell them that this can’t continue. If they won’t listen, then you either refuse to do what you are doing or go to the authorities.
if your parents are doing no sort of housework, then they're just lazy. it's unfortunate for you but you'll have to persevere until you can move out and won't have to deal with it anymore. don't expect a thank you from parents, it's rare. it sounds like your parents are African (apologies if I am wrong).
maybe they seem like that because they work long hours so are very tired. if that's not the case, then they're just lazy😂
maybe they seem like that because they work long hours so are very tired. if that's not the case, then they're just lazy😂
Original post by JaydorIV
if your parents are doing no sort of housework, then they're just lazy. it's unfortunate for you but you'll have to persevere until you can move out and won't have to deal with it anymore. don't expect a thank you from parents, it's rare. it sounds like your parents are African (apologies if I am wrong).
maybe they seem like that because they work long hours so are very tired. if that's not the case, then they're just lazy😂
maybe they seem like that because they work long hours so are very tired. if that's not the case, then they're just lazy😂
I get what you are saying. The OP is 16 and when she eventually moves out, the other siblings will be expected to carry on the family ‘tradition’ of being servants to their lazy parents.
Original post by Seamus123
I get what you are saying. The OP is 16 and when she eventually moves out, the other siblings will be expected to carry on the family ‘tradition’ of being servants to their lazy parents.
she could also try to talk to her parents about it, hopefully they listen and understand and changes happen.
That's not normal, talk with them first. All of you siblings, tell them you'll help around but cannot be expected to do everything.
This is pretty much what my home life is like. I am currently 15.my mom is nice about it but when she comes home from work she just plays on her computer, sleeps, or watches her show. I do everything around the house. Sometimes she will take out the trash or put her dishes up to the sink bit I mostly do all of that. I cook for my brother, do the dishes, clean and feed our pets. When she cooks, she only cooks for herself and will sometimes give us (me and my brother) some of what she made. She doesnt even clean up the dishes that she used to cook. When I get back from a weekend of being at my dads house I come back and the kitchen is a mess and there is cheese left out ok the counter and pots in pans that need to be cleaned that are on top of the oven. I don't know what to do and should I just continue to be nice and do all of it?
Original post by Elizabeth222
This is pretty much what my home life is like. I am currently 15.my mom is nice about it but when she comes home from work she just plays on her computer, sleeps, or watches her show. I do everything around the house. Sometimes she will take out the trash or put her dishes up to the sink bit I mostly do all of that. I cook for my brother, do the dishes, clean and feed our pets. When she cooks, she only cooks for herself and will sometimes give us (me and my brother) some of what she made. She doesnt even clean up the dishes that she used to cook. When I get back from a weekend of being at my dads house I come back and the kitchen is a mess and there is cheese left out ok the counter and pots in pans that need to be cleaned that are on top of the oven. I don't know what to do and should I just continue to be nice and do all of it?
Is moving with your dad an option?
Original post by It's****ingWOODY
Is moving with your dad an option?
My mom sued him so he doesnt have enough money. It wouldn't be good for me since he can be so controlling
I just feel like I'm making a big deal out of it and I just need to suck it up. Do you think this would be considered emotional abuse and/or neglect?
no it is not my parents treat me the same what like what the heck!
My dad is whiter that white can be and he is a carpenter. But he expects me to clean the house like I am his wife. It is just me and him. He is an alcoholic and I kid you not he calls me out of my room at least every 4- 8 minutes. I was watching a 50 minute episode on netflix (which he does not pay for) and it took me about a total of 3 hours to finish the episode because he constantly had me tending to him. He also thinks that my 40 dollar phone bill is a good allowance for a whole month and he makes 18 dollars an hour. He tends to run out of money and borrow money from me. And I do not have a job. PS I'm 16
Oh girl I'm praying for you. Please talk to a counselor at school or an adult you trust
Original post by Claire461
No, my dear, it isn’t normal. You are the responsibility of your parents as are your siblings and not vice versa. This behaviour on the part of your parents constitutes neglect and abuse.
There is a line between children mucking in and doing some chores and being expected to wait hand and foot on parents who should be carrying out their parental responsilities. I had 7 children and everyone had chores they had to do for their pocket money, but they were geared to their age and maturity and we worked as a team and it worked very well. Children need time to themselves to grow and develop and enjoy growing up so that they grow into rounded adults. You are still at 16 and your siblings are not your responsibilities.
You need to speak to your parents and tell them that this can’t continue. If they won’t listen, then you either refuse to do what you are doing or go to the authorities.
There is a line between children mucking in and doing some chores and being expected to wait hand and foot on parents who should be carrying out their parental responsilities. I had 7 children and everyone had chores they had to do for their pocket money, but they were geared to their age and maturity and we worked as a team and it worked very well. Children need time to themselves to grow and develop and enjoy growing up so that they grow into rounded adults. You are still at 16 and your siblings are not your responsibilities.
You need to speak to your parents and tell them that this can’t continue. If they won’t listen, then you either refuse to do what you are doing or go to the authorities.
if you happen to be the first born maybe your parents suffered post natal depression which was never dealt with till now so they did not deal away with that mentality of you being in between them or you are taking love from them each parent thought the other loves you and neglecting his or her spouse. the other thing maybe it’s because from all the siblings you are the one who cooperates and who doesn’t easily get angry so they end up abusing your patience and understanding. doing chores is good for you, you will not be a lazy person. my advice is try fasting and praying about it. will you well
My life is the same way. When I respond they tell me I have an attitude. They tell me the same thing when I'm stressed out. I have to clean up after every one and take care of all the pets. And my parents get my siblings way better thing and don't let me even get a break. I don't even have any clothing that fits 😕. But at the same time I am lucky enough to have a phone so at least there's that. Is this life normal? I need to know cuz I feel a little bit dramatic about this. Plus I have depression, insomnia, anxiety, and adhd that is untreated because they think I can deal with it. Plz is this normal?
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