My dad has stopped all contact with me

Last Christmas he didn't even get me a present and he has since ignored all contact I've tried to make with him via phone. I'm very angry and upset that he's just decided to start ignoring me like this when I've always bought him expensive gifts for Christmas and his birthday and to be frank I'm tired of chasing him. What kind of daughter has to chase their own parent? I would understand if I was a bad daughter, pregnant at 16 or drug addicted or criminal but I'm at a top 30 university studying a respectable STEM subject with ambitions to get into medicine and working nearly full time alongside that. I don't deserve this

Reply 1

username3941996

22

Sometimes these things happen. You expect someone to stand up just for them to run away. He has decided which path he wants to take and while it may be difficult to accept that, you need to let it go. focus on your own life and career. You can't force him to have a relationship with you

Reply 2

Anonymous #1

OP

I'm pissed off all my life through my teen years it has nearly always been me initiating contact with him to see him. Everyone else has normal happy families and I have the dad who doesn't give a **** about me

Reply 3

username4164712

15

Original post by Anonymous

Last Christmas he didn't even get me a present and he has since ignored all contact I've tried to make with him via phone. I'm very angry and upset that he's just decided to start ignoring me like this when I've always bought him expensive gifts for Christmas and his birthday and to be frank I'm tired of chasing him. What kind of daughter has to chase their own parent? I would understand if I was a bad daughter, pregnant at 16 or drug addicted or criminal but I'm at a top 30 university studying a respectable STEM subject with ambitions to get into medicine and working nearly full time alongside that. I don't deserve this

I’ve never got presents bro but it’s cool he’ll probably regret it

Reply 4

Anonymous #1

OP

Well **** him if he doesn't get in contact with me by the time it's my birthday his number is getting blocked and only his mother is getting any presents the rest of his family can go **** themselves

Reply 5

Anonymous #1

OP

I just don't understand why he's doing this? I haven't been a bad daughter but aren't parents supposed to care about their kids?

Original post by Professional G

Sometimes these things happen. You expect someone to stand up just for them to run away. He has decided which path he wants to take and while it may be difficult to accept that, you need to let it go. focus on your own life and career. You can't force him to have a relationship with you

Reply 6

username3941996

22

Original post by 11223344bo

I’ve never got presents bro but it’s cool he’ll probably regret it

Original post by Anonymous

I'm pissed off all my life through my teen years it has nearly always been me initiating contact with him to see him. Everyone else has normal happy families and I have the dad who doesn't give a **** about me

focus on your own lives and be your own person. Its time you stand up for yourselves and not be the one chasing. He made his choice and now he has to live with it.

Reply 7

Anonymous #2

nah not everyone has a happy family! speaking from experience did u do anything to annoy him?! it can be very frustrating but the most important individual here is yourself. you wanna do medicine!? work you damn arse off and make something of yourself. if he wont bother then leave it. obviously stay civil and that (dont be like me im so bloody stubborn and short fused) but work on yourself, build connections with other family members and forget it. maybe one day he’ll turn around and realise he’s being illogical but men are like infants and sometimes if they’re being whiny or a pain in the back you gotta sit them in the corner until they run back. thats literally my life motto with 3 men, they gone whine or give you thw silent treatment and you just dont follow them otherwise youre feeding their ego and making them think they got one up. forget it and focus on yourself girl!!!

Reply 8

username3941996

22

Original post by Anonymous

I just don't understand why he's doing this? I haven't been a bad daughter but aren't parents supposed to care about their kids?

You may never find out why but don't let that worry you. As far as i'm concerned, he is not your parent, just someone who shares the same surname or genes but he isn't a part of your life anymore.

Reply 9

Anonymous #1

OP

No nothing that I know of. I last saw him when I was 18 and now I'm 24 so I don't really know why I give a **** so much so I'll just delete his number after end of May because he clearly doesn't give a ****

Original post by Anonymous

nah not everyone has a happy family! speaking from experience did u do anything to annoy him?! it can be very frustrating but the most important individual here is yourself. you wanna do medicine!? work you damn arse off and make something of yourself. if he wont bother then leave it. obviously stay civil and that (dont be like me im so bloody stubborn and short fused) but work on yourself, build connections with other family members and forget it. maybe one day he’ll turn around and realise he’s being illogical but men are like infants and sometimes if they’re being whiny or a pain in the back you gotta sit them in the corner until they run back. thats literally my life motto with 3 men, they gone whine or give you thw silent treatment and you just dont follow them otherwise youre feeding their ego and making them think they got one up. forget it and focus on yourself girl!!!

Reply 10

That'sGreat

21

Original post by Anonymous

No nothing that I know of. I last saw him when I was 18 and now I'm 24 so I don't really know why I give a **** so much so I'll just delete his number after end of May because he clearly doesn't give a ****

For what reason have you not seen him for 6 years? Have you not gone home during the holidays at university? Have you not asked to stay with them for christmas?

Reply 11

Anonymous #2

Original post by Anonymous

No nothing that I know of. I last saw him when I was 18 and now I'm 24 so I don't really know why I give a **** so much so I'll just delete his number after end of May because he clearly doesn't give a ****

are your parents split or something? sometimes they may take anger out on the kids? if you can get a response from him or even meet in person and go hey whats your deal see if he does or says anything otherwise move on but as i said stay civil because he is still your biological father and hopefully he isn’t physically abusive and who knows maybe in 30 years you’ll make up and you dont want to regret mistreating him. just cut him off if he doesnt pull his weight

its like what do you do when someone stops having a convo or their company starts to lag, it clearly means they are uninterested and you never latch on because YOU ARE BETTER THAN THAT. GO BE A FANTASTIC DOCTOR and show him what he missed out on!!!! xxxxx

Reply 12

Anonymous #1

OP

My mum and dad split up when I was two. He doesn't live with my mum

Original post by That'sGreat

For what reason have you not seen him for 6 years? Have you not gone home during the holidays at university? Have you not asked to stay with them for christmas?

Reply 13

Gracie_Faith

9

Original post by Anonymous

Last Christmas he didn't even get me a present and he has since ignored all contact I've tried to make with him via phone. I'm very angry and upset that he's just decided to start ignoring me like this when I've always bought him expensive gifts for Christmas and his birthday and to be frank I'm tired of chasing him. What kind of daughter has to chase their own parent? I would understand if I was a bad daughter, pregnant at 16 or drug addicted or criminal but I'm at a top 30 university studying a respectable STEM subject with ambitions to get into medicine and working nearly full time alongside that. I don't deserve this

Dang that’s messed up honestly he’s your dad he shouldn’t just stop talking to you 😢

Reply 14

That'sGreat

21

Original post by Anonymous

My mum and dad split up when I was two. He doesn't live with my mum

Didn't answer the question did you. Why haven't you asked to come back during holidays or asked to spend christmas with him?

Reply 15

Anonymous #1

OP

If had to chase the damn man for a day with him (where he barely tolerated me anyway) what makes you think he'd have me stopping over at his house? I come back during holidays but I go live with one of my friends instead and just see my mum

Original post by That'sGreat

Didn't answer the question did you. Why haven't you asked to come back during holidays or asked to spend christmas with him?

Reply 16

That'sGreat

21

Original post by Anonymous

If had to chase the damn man for a day with him (where he barely tolerated me anyway) what makes you think he'd have me stopping over at his house? I come back during holidays but I go live with one of my friends instead and just see my mum

So that's a no to you making an attempt to ask him then.

Reply 17

Anonymous #1

OP

He has now not replied to me for over a year and having a 24 year old women stopping over at her dads house is ridiculous anyway.

Original post by That'sGreat

So that's a no to you making an attempt to ask him then.

Reply 18

Anonymous #2

that may be why then? i know dads get upset when they’re little girls chuck their dads away. i think there may be a little responsibility on your side as well (it does take 2 to tango) you decided he didnt like you and didnt bother contacting him for years and left him and went with your mum or friends. have a chat with him and maybe apologise for not trying to keep in contact or visiting. your parent split when u were 2 so you were probably his little princess before that and i know they hurt when they’re little ones turn their back on them

in response to your comment about a 24 year old woman stopping at his house...to be completely honest youre not just any 24 year old women stopping at some mans house, your his daughter, half of him and you make it out like he barely can stand you but hes never expressed that, at least it doesnt sound like he’s hated u since day 1 but in all honesty you really didnt try in the beginning so you cant expect him to snap back to happy families after being abandoned for so long