The Student Room Group

How do I stop feeling extremely lonely?

I'm a 20 y/o female uni student and I feel really depressed and lonely. I have people to talk to here and there but I don't have any proper friends, and my daily routine mostly consists of going to university and then going home. I feel overwhelmed with the amount of work I have to do that I hardly have time for myself, when I try getting to know people men just want to get me in bed and girls are always b*tchy. Nothing makes me happy, I feel like I don't have time to do anything, if I spend a day watching TV instead of revising I feel like I massively fall behind on work. I don't know how to stop feeling like sh*t everyday, it's driving me insane because I've been living like this for the past four years as i've always been doing really difficult subjects.
Reply 1
Hi!! I feel similar to you, I just started university. What inspires you and what would you like to see yourself doing?
Reply 2
Original post by diyoza
Hi!! I feel similar to you, I just started university. What inspires you and what would you like to see yourself doing?

Honestly i just want to enjoy myself and go out, but I don't really have any proper friends to hang out with plus my parents are strict so it just adds pressure on me to do well at uni, I'm always just expected to study all the time. i'm doing engineering so obvs its super difficult and theres loads of content that's why i feel so overwhelmed and sh*tty
Well I wouldn't want to be friends with someone that labels all girls as *****y?
Original post by Anonymous
I'm a 20 y/o female uni student and I feel really depressed and lonely. I have people to talk to here and there but I don't have any proper friends, and my daily routine mostly consists of going to university and then going home. I feel overwhelmed with the amount of work I have to do that I hardly have time for myself, when I try getting to know people men just want to get me in bed and girls are always b*tchy. Nothing makes me happy, I feel like I don't have time to do anything, if I spend a day watching TV instead of revising I feel like I massively fall behind on work. I don't know how to stop feeling like sh*t everyday, it's driving me insane because I've been living like this for the past four years as i've always been doing really difficult subjects.


Make an imaginary friend.... 🤷🏻*♂️
Reply 5
Original post by Anonymous
Well I wouldn't want to be friends with someone that labels all girls as *****y?

i didn't say that all girls are, but the ones i've come across just see other girls as competition and don't really make an effort into friendship
Reply 6
Original post by Anonymous
Honestly i just want to enjoy myself and go out, but I don't really have any proper friends to hang out with plus my parents are strict so it just adds pressure on me to do well at uni, I'm always just expected to study all the time. i'm doing engineering so obvs its super difficult and theres loads of content that's why i feel so overwhelmed and sh*tty

Okay I know it's really difficult but you need balance, do you commute in to your university? If so that might be a reason that you're struggling to make friends as a lot of friendship foundations are made by being in halls/private accomodation. But that is definitely not the only way, as 99% of "closest" friends are on my course/met through societies. Are you able to join any societies?
Hey! message me if you want to talk privately! no one deserves to feel like this x
Reply 8
Original post by diyoza
Okay I know it's really difficult but you need balance, do you commute in to your university? If so that might be a reason that you're struggling to make friends as a lot of friendship foundations are made by being in halls/private accomodation. But that is definitely not the only way, as 99% of "closest" friends are on my course/met through societies. Are you able to join any societies?

yeah i commute, i find it hard to make friends on my course because in lectures nobody can talk to each other and when i try initiating conversation it's just basic and we don't talk outside of university. i don't really know which societies i should join
Reply 9
Original post by abiidarkerr
Hey! message me if you want to talk privately! no one deserves to feel like this x

thank you for asking x but i don't really want to come off anonymous
Reply 10
Original post by Anonymous
yeah i commute, i find it hard to make friends on my course because in lectures nobody can talk to each other and when i try initiating conversation it's just basic and we don't talk outside of university. i don't really know which societies i should join

It's completely normal to have basic conversations at first, as no one really knows each other and people probably feel nervous as well! I know it's really challenging but ask if someone wants to go for a coffee after your lecture/seminar, or if they want to go for a drink. If not that then get their snapchat/instagram. Anything that will help you to get to know the person. Most unis have so many societies... what interests you??
Original post by diyoza
It's completely normal to have basic conversations at first, as no one really knows each other and people probably feel nervous as well! I know it's really challenging but ask if someone wants to go for a coffee after your lecture/seminar, or if they want to go for a drink. If not that then get their snapchat/instagram. Anything that will help you to get to know the person. Most unis have so many societies... what interests you??

well i enjoy music, tv, eating, shopping.. idk which society that fits in loool
thank you for replying btw :smile:
Reply 12
just do some hobbys and go out with friends
Reply 13
Original post by Anonymous
well i enjoy music, tv, eating, shopping.. idk which society that fits in loool
thank you for replying btw :smile:

I'm sure there'll be a music society, however it'll probably involve playing an instrument or singing so I'm not sure if that's what would interest you. There could also be an engineering society? you might feel more comfortable talking to people there as it's more of a relaxed environment, and you all have something in common! Another option is just trying something new, like a sport society. From experience I know it's really hard to find the motivation to go to places/events that are out of your comfort zone but it'll make you feel so good afterwards.
Original post by diyoza
I'm sure there'll be a music society, however it'll probably involve playing an instrument or singing so I'm not sure if that's what would interest you. There could also be an engineering society? you might feel more comfortable talking to people there as it's more of a relaxed environment, and you all have something in common! Another option is just trying something new, like a sport society. From experience I know it's really hard to find the motivation to go to places/events that are out of your comfort zone but it'll make you feel so good afterwards.

thank you so much for your help, i really appreciate it :smile: hopefully it works out
Reply 15
Original post by Anonymous
thank you so much for your help, i really appreciate it :smile: hopefully it works out

That's okay I'm more than happy to help :smile: I know you said above that you do not want to come off anon but if you change your mind, feel free to PM! Everything will work out!
Original post by Anonymous
thank you for asking x but i don't really want to come off anonymous

ok love just know that if you do want to message me it will be in the strictest confidence! x

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