Muslim roommate and how to make them comfortable

OP

Thanks for all the advice! Won't try to make it weird and just wanted to be appropriate ahah. Thanks everyone x

Reply 5

Anonymous #4

Original post by Trinculo

What the hell is this? It's not for you to make them comfortable. They're not disabled. I think a grown adult can deal with living in a normal house with normal people.

What, did you think Muslims need like a special shower rails or stairlifts or something? Kinda bigoted of you.

well clearly shes thoughtful and helpful why r u so offended

Reply 6

Original post by Anonymous

well clearly shes thoughtful and helpful why r u so offended

What makes you think I'm offended? I'm the one who isn't running in fear of causing offence.

Don't you think it's kind of patronising to try and make reasonable adjustments to someone on the basis of their religion? That's what you do for blind people.

Reply 7

Anonymous #4

Original post by Trinculo

What makes you think I'm offended? I'm the one who isn't running in fear of causing offence.

Don't you think it's kind of patronising to try and make reasonable adjustments to someone on the basis of their religion? That's what you do for blind people.

its a general term used i dont mean it literally

also u cant just call someone whos trying to help bigoted
and no i dont think its patronising its acc quite thoughtful

Reply 8

Anonymous #5

Original post by Trinculo

What makes you think I'm offended? I'm the one who isn't running in fear of causing offence.

Don't you think it's kind of patronising to try and make reasonable adjustments to someone on the basis of their religion? That's what you do for blind people.

as a muslim who has lived with non-muslims for 2 years of uni, i really appreciate this kind person taking their time out to consider her flatmate. My flatmates would leave alcohol cans/bottles everywhere, leave open pork/bacon in the fridge and even on counters despite knowing i was muslim but i never said anything

Reply 9

becausethenight

19

Original post by Anonymous

Hi! In September I'll be moving into a five person flat for uni and one of my roommates is a Muslim. I'm non religious and want to be as accomodating as possible / avoid making her uncomfortable in any way but I'm a bit uneducated about Islam. I am trying to research and will ask them later on but for now does anyone have any tips? I understand they can't have pork or alcohol but can it be in the fridge? Thanks! x

I'd speak to her about it when you get to uni and what she is or isn't comfortable with.

Muslims aren't monolithic and she will have her preferences depending on how devout she is. If she says she's fine with pork in the fridge, for example, or does drink alcohol, just assume she knows what she wants!

Reply 10

Anonymous #4

Original post by Anonymous

as a muslim who has lived with non-muslims for 2 years of uni, i really appreciate this kind person taking their time out to consider her flatmate. My flatmates would leave alcohol cans/bottles everywhere, leave open pork/bacon in the fridge and even on counters despite knowing i was muslim but i never said anything

100%

Reply 11

Original post by Anonymous

as a muslim who has lived with non-muslims for 2 years of uni, i really appreciate this kind person taking their time out to consider her flatmate. My flatmates would leave alcohol cans/bottles everywhere, leave open pork/bacon in the fridge and even on counters despite knowing i was muslim but i never said anything

That's your problem, not their's.

Why would you expect people to make changed on the basis of your culture and religion? Their culture is to eat pork and drink alcohol. Why does what you like trump what they like? That's kind of the definition of snowflakery.

Reply 12

If you don't like pork and booze - there's a really simple solution - live with other people who also don't like those things. Don't expect others to change because of you. That's kind of a rule for life in general.

Reply 13

OP

Original post by Trinculo

What the hell is this? It's not for you to make them comfortable. They're not disabled. I think a grown adult can deal with living in a normal house with normal people.

What, did you think Muslims need like a special shower rails or stairlifts or something? Kinda bigoted of you.

I apologize that trying to be considerate is so upsetting to you. I just wanted to make sure I wasn't going to make someone comfortable, ie by having pork in the fridge or visibly drinking or having my boyfriend round. Luckily you're not the one who has to live with us so don't you worry about my own concerns.

Reply 14

New Foil

18

Original post by Trinculo

If you don't like pork and booze - there's a really simple solution - live with other people who also don't like those things. Don't expect others to change because of you. That's kind of a rule for life in general.

I done see anyone *expecting* anything in this thread? Or for anyone to change?

Reply 15

OP

Original post by Anonymous

I apologize that trying to be considerate is so upsetting to you. I just wanted to make sure I wasn't going to make someone comfortable, ie by having pork in the fridge or visibly drinking or having my boyfriend round. Luckily you're not the one who has to live with us so don't you worry about my own concerns.

*Uncomfortable, even

Reply 16

New Foil

18

Original post by Anonymous

I apologize that trying to be considerate is so upsetting to you. I just wanted to make sure I wasn't going to make someone comfortable, ie by having pork in the fridge or visibly drinking or having my boyfriend round. Luckily you're not the one who has to live with us so don't you worry about my own concerns.

I’m not religious at all and my Uni flat mate was Muslim too. Its really nice that you’re thinking of them, but every Muslim is different, you won’t know until you meet her (how strict she is etc.). My flatmate was pretty religious but didn’t mind at all about the rest of us drinking or anything. Try asking her when you meet her

Reply 17

OP

Original post by New Foil

I’m not religious at all and my Uni flat mate was Muslim too. Its really nice that you’re thinking of them, but every Muslim is different, you won’t know until you meet her (how strict she is etc.). My flatmate was pretty religious but didn’t mind at all about the rest of us drinking or anything. Try asking her when you meet her

Will do, that'll be the easiest way to go about it instead of starting the student room debates. :biggrin:

Thanks for your advice and for most of the helpful people here

Reply 18

Original post by New Foil

I done see anyone *expecting* anything in this thread? Or for anyone to change?

There are people in this conversation who are so wet that they want to change to accomodate other people's foibles. There's also someone complaining at how their flatmates didn't change to accomodate their foibles.

Original post by Anonymous

I apologize that trying to be considerate is so upsetting to you. I just wanted to make sure I wasn't going to make someone comfortable, ie by having pork in the fridge or visibly drinking or having my boyfriend round. Luckily you're not the one who has to live with us so don't you worry about my own concerns.

It's not upsetting me. That's something that you invented in your own mind to try and deflect the conversation. If you want to behave in this way - that's up to you, although I think it's absurd, patronising behaviour. I cannot fathom that you would actually consider not having your boyfriend round because of your roomate's religion. Did you ask him if he's ok with this?

Reply 19