The Student Room Group

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Reply 1
Don't try and look intelligent.
Reply 2
Dont hate me cos I run game. Plus, we're supposed to be brothers.
Reply 3
I don't believe it's the sex which is wrong in cheating, for me it's the deception. If a couple are happy and willing to have an open realtionship then to me that's not really cheating because both parties are fully aware of what is going on. I think it's wrong when a decision has been taken by the couple not to have relations outside of their marriage/relationship but one half of that marriage breaks that mutual agreement.
Also for me cheating doesn't necessarily have to involve sex, it can include anything that involves emotions being placed on a person other than the one you are in a relationship with while not disclosing it to your partner (if that makes sense! :wink: )
All in all, I just think it's wrong to mis-lead someone or hurt them by doing something which you know is not accepted in your particular relationship :smile:
Reply 4
Deception is wrong, but if its not sex, I dont consider it cheating.
PFC123
I don't believe it's the sex which is wrong in cheating, for me it's the deception. If a couple are happy and willing to have an open realtionship then to me that's not really cheating because both parties are fully aware of what is going on. I think it's wrong when a decision has been taken by the couple not to have relations outside of their marriage/relationship but one half of that marriage breaks that mutual agreement.
Also for me cheating doesn't necessarily have to involve sex, it can include anything that involves emotions being placed on a person other than the one you are in a relationship with while not disclosing it to your partner (if that makes sense! :wink: )
All in all, I just think it's wrong to mis-lead someone or hurt them by doing something which you know is not accepted in your particular relationship :smile:

I totally agree with what you have said, i would class cheating as my gf have ing emotions for other people as she did for me at the begining of the relationship, and if they were stronger feelings i would feel hurt by it, oh and of course if she were to sleep with someone else then i wouldn't be happy, because to do that kind of thing with a bit on the side you have to have a lot of feeling for them.
Reply 6
What abt the point* that you cannot control who you have feelings for, hence short of physical relations, one cannot "cheat"?

*this may not represent my real views.
Reply 7
Legbreakgoogly:
Deception is wrong


Well you answered your own question. Cheating = deception = wrong :rolleyes:!
What abt the point* that you cannot control who you have feelings for, hence short of physical relations, one cannot "cheat"?


Thats an excuse, a way of discharging yourself from the responsibilities of fudging up a relationship.
Reply 9
Yes, I to think one has a degree of control. But just as a person would get tired of coke everyday, and desire a Red Bull, so one could get tired of a gf and desire another woman for a change.

No?
Reply 10
legbreakgoogly
What abt the point* that you cannot control who you have feelings for, hence short of physical relations, one cannot "cheat"?

*this may not represent my real views.


I think there is a difference between fancying or liking someone else and actually doing anything about it :smile: To me, I know that my bf will and does fancy other girls, it's just a fact of life. However, for that to move onto something else he would have to spend quality time with someone else behind my back. Also, if my bf was seeing someone he fancied while not telling me or whilst telling me that there was no-one else for him etc, then I would see that as him deceiving me by lying about his feelings for someone else.
You're right, you cannot control who you have feelings for but I believe those initial feelings are purely physical (which can't be helped) but for things to progress to 'true' feelings you'd need to spend time with them in a more intimate way :smile:
Reply 11
But just as a person would get tired of coke everyday, and desire a Red Bull, so one could get tired of a gf and desire another woman for a change.


Er women and coke aren't the same. Don't be such a d*ckhead.
One also has the ability to inform one's girlfriend (who assumes you to be faithful) that you are ending the relationship. Unless it's an open one.
PFC123
I think there is a difference between fancying or liking someone else and actually doing anything about it :smile: To me, I know that my bf will and does fancy other girls, it's just a fact of life. However, for that to move onto something else he would have to spend quality time with someone else behind my back. Also, if my bf was seeing someone he fancied while not telling me or whilst telling me that there was no-one else for him etc, then I would see that as him deceiving me by lying about his feelings for someone else.
You're right, you cannot control who you have feelings for but I believe those initial feelings are purely physical (which can't be helped) but for things to progress to 'true' feelings you'd need to spend time with them in a more intimate way :smile:


It is my opinion that one has a large degree of control over feelings. Hence the * and then explanation to that effect.

The coke was just an analogy.
Reply 14
legbreakgoogly
Yes, I to think one has a degree of control. But just as a person would get tired of coke everyday, and desire a Red Bull, so one could get tired of a gf and desire another woman for a change.

No?


No :smile: No matter how much you'd like to try a Red Bull if you've promised that you'll only drink coke then that's what you should do :biggrin: If however, you're really bored of coke then by all means put it back on the shelf but don't try to drink both at the same time, let the coke go before picking up the Red Bull :wink:
Reply 15
The coke was just an analogy


Well, it is very badly used, since you cannot treat girls as you would treat coke.
Apparently not.
PFC123
No :smile: No matter how much you'd like to try a Red Bull if you've promised that you'll only drink coke then that's what you should do :biggrin: If however, you're really bored of coke then by all means put it back on the shelf but don't try to drink both at the same time, let the coke go before picking up the Red Bull :wink:


But Red Bull and Coke...is a mind blowing combo.
legbreakgoogly
But Red Bull and Coke...is a mind blowing combo.


And if you try to have both you're likely to end up with neither.

If you seriously do think that it's ok to cheat one someone (which in my opinion there is no excuse for) then you'll have to come up with some serious reasons, otherwise there is no point to this thread.

Ruthie xx

EDIT: and imagine how you'd feel the next day.
It was a qyestion to the floor, not a stated opinion.