The Student Room Group

Sleeping around if you're a girl

At uni there's often the temptation to go back to a guy's house after a night out (I go out clubbing a lot and pull guys quite a bit) as you're only a student once and after you graduate you never quite have the same opportunity to "play around," so to speak. Plus you're not single forever and quite a few settle into committed relationships after uni.


Provided you use protection and do stuff safely, and don't go back with guys who seem dodgy/weirdos, what's the actual risk involved in bringing a chap back to yours or vice versa every couple of weeks or even just every now and then? (Obviously there's the social stigma of being a "slut," but I don't approve of that term and I don't mean tons of guys)

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Reply 1
Original post by Anonymous
A
and don't go back with guys who seem dodgy/weirdos,


The dodgy weirdos will often not present as such
Reply 2
So many of my female flatmates think nothing of bringing guys from clubs for ONS's. I don't think they're bad people and just see it as student culture. Do you!
For me, I'm big on discretion and you can't guarantee that with these dudes amongst other things so I prefer to be more selective.
Absolutely nothing wrong with it.

Honestly, too much of anything is a bad thing.

Serial monogamists aren't getting the variety and excitement of multiple sexual partners.

If you're confined to one night stands you're not getting the companionship and intimacy that comes with relationships, and can make sex really intense.

A bit of both is perfect, for both sexes. I wish more women would embrace their adventurous side.
drug rape, violent rape, kidnap and a reputation.
Original post by consumed by stuff
drug rape, violent rape, kidnap and a reputation.


3 of those are highly unlikely.
Reply 6
Original post by AtlasCanTakeIt
Absolutely nothing wrong with it.

Honestly, too much of anything is a bad thing.

Serial monogamists aren't getting the variety and excitement of multiple sexual partners.

If you're confined to one night stands you're not getting the companionship and intimacy that comes with relationships, and can make sex really intense.

A bit of both is perfect, for both sexes. I wish more women would embrace their adventurous side.


I don't really have time for a relationship right now (have had male friends ask me out but I can't commit to something like that) and obviously sleeping with guys I know in an FWB-type arrangement can cause numerous friendship issues. I pretty much have to be single right now so was considering making the most of it :biggrin:
Original post by Anonymous
I don't really have time for a relationship right now (have had male friends ask me out but I can't commit to something like that) and obviously sleeping with guys I know in an FWB-type arrangement can cause numerous friendship issues. I pretty much have to be single right now so was considering making the most of it :biggrin:


Go for it.

Bring condoms out with you and be sensible.

You're only young once.
Reply 8
I personally think the 'you're not single forever' mentality is like saying, well, I can't eat chocolate foreeeeever so I should eat as much as possible now. Or, you can't drink on a monday morning when you've got a job.... so I'll just drink now.

Rather than thinking about what may or may not happen in the future, or what others think, just enjoy yourself. If you meet someone and want to bring them back, bring them back, or you're in the mood for that sort of fun, go ahead. As long as you're happy and not surrendering to peer pressure/or whatever other mumsy term people might use then there's no harm done.

However, there's no point thinking WELL I'LL REGRET IT IF I DON'T... because life doesn't actually work like that when it comes to casual sex.
(edited 11 years ago)
Original post by AtlasCanTakeIt
3 of those are highly unlikely.


true people dont really have reputations, and getting raped both ways is unlikely.
Reply 10
Personally I think it is okay. But a must is the protection. The other slight issue is the risk of catching STDs. These can be transmitted orally too. And if the condom splits etc there that risk too. But be careful and have fun! YOLO


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Reply 11
Should probably also mention I'm worried about how future boyfriends might percieve it (have always been honest about my sexual history and dont want a guy to think I used to be a slag haha)
Sex is pleasurable

It's natural for humans to want it, we are animals. Girl or Boy, it doesn't matter.
To me this isn't even about sex, it's about locking yourself in the room of a complete stranger's house and exposing yourself in your most vulnerable form.

To me that's just far too risky. It's far better for him to come back to yours.
(edited 11 years ago)
Original post by Anonymous
Should probably also mention I'm worried about how future boyfriends might percieve it (have always been honest about my sexual history and dont want a guy to think I used to be a slag haha)


Depends how you feel about it.

I'm going to sound like a complete cock here.

I've slept with over a dozen women and I'm 24. I've had 3 serious relationships.

If I act like I'm ashamed when I tell a partner then she'll think there's something to be ashamed about.

I'm not. It's 2013 and casual sex is a normal part of adult life nowadays.

I wouldn't want to be with someone who's judgemental about sex anyway, there are more important things in life.
Reply 15
Original post by AtlasCanTakeIt
Depends how you feel about it.

I'm going to sound like a complete cock here.

I've slept with over a dozen women and I'm 24. I've had 3 serious relationships.

If I act like I'm ashamed when I tell a partner then she'll think there's something to be ashamed about.

I'm not. It's 2013 and casual sex is a normal part of adult life nowadays.

I wouldn't want to be with someone who's judgemental about sex anyway, there are more important things in life.


I think you're right. My sexual partners number is pretty large but at the end of the day if your future partner is to judge you just on that they really are rather shallow


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Reply 16
Risk involved? Well, there is none. If you don't care about how you're seen (be it a slag or not) by others, then you're golden. I don't think I need to tell you to have protection.

I will admit though, while it may sound shallow or at least unfair, I'd be a little put off by a girl who slept around a lot. Of course it's none of my business, but I suppose it comes from the fact that I think sex should be between two people in a committed relationship who love each other, and not with a random guy/girl.
Reply 17
Nothing wrong with it, although one minor thing is that if you're bringing different guys home all the time it might get annoying for the people you live with. I used to share a flat with two girls who brought home about 20 different guys between them over the course of a few months. There's only so much "ah right, you're some sort of poser **** round for a quick shag, nice to meet you" chat you can stomach in your own kitchen.

Bottom line is that nobody really cares in the slightest how many guys you meet, so long as they don't actually have to deal with them.
Original post by bank_midge
Nothing wrong with it, although one minor thing is that if you're bringing different guys home all the time it might get annoying for the people you live with. I used to share a flat with two girls who brought home about 20 different guys between them over the course of a few months. There's only so much "ah right, you're some sort of poser **** round for a quick shag, nice to meet you" chat you can stomach in your own kitchen.

Bottom line is that nobody really cares in the slightest how many guys you meet, so long as they don't actually have to deal with them.


That's true. Keep em in your room or get them out nice and early in the morning if possible.

There's a degree of etiquette required.
Not ashamed to say I sleep around but its not as dangerous for me as I don't do it with men.

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