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Why don't guys ever seem to like me?

It sounds silly to ask but, I don't think I'm exactly ugly, I've been told I'm quite pretty by girls and adults but never guys. I have quite low esteem when it comes to my appearance, so I don't really rate myself too highly but at the same time I know I'm not 100% ugly. I guess I'm a nice person too, I tend to put others before myself and I'm always there for advice when anyone needs it. I work hard at school so, I'm far from stupid to be honest, but I can be quite shy when it comes to approaching people but once I get talking I can talk for hours on end and tend to make people laugh. The only problem is that I'm always the girl who is dismissed by guys. I'm either completely ignored as if I'm invisible or they make fun of me (usually about my hair as apparently it's a "lesbian hair cut" and because of my height as I'm only 5'1") I don't understand what the problem with me is.

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Reply 1
Is that you in your avatar? If so, then you're definitely not unattractive. :smile:

I would say when it comes to a guy you like or vibe with, screw gender expectations and traditions, and just ask him out. Also, any guy who takes the piss out of your haircut or how you look has made things easier for you. Why? Well because by making such comments he has identified himself as a douchebag who you should stay away from. :tongue:
watch this, it could really help ^^^
School / college is quite a different "dating market" from university which is then even more different from "the real world". In the dating markets you progress to as you get older the pettiness disappears, people don't "make fun of you for a lesbian haircut" etc and you find a wider choice of people so its easier to find someone who is more compatible and who likes you.

I know it's frustrating but if you are generally happy with what you are like as a person just try not to feel too down about it now and wait for later as you will have much better chances in the future. When I was at uni I met lots of girls who were attractive and nice but who hadn't really had much experience with guys, usually because they were more of the quieter/academic type.
You could always try online dating, OkayCupid for more personality based dating or Tinder for appearance based.
Reply 6
Original post by Danz123
Is that you in your avatar? If so, then you're definitely not unattractive. :smile:

I would say when it comes to a guy you like or vibe with, screw gender expectations and traditions, and just ask him out. Also, any guy who takes the piss out of your haircut or how you look has made things easier for you. Why? Well because by making such comments he has identified himself as a douchebag who you should stay away from. :tongue:

Yeah that's me in my avatar and thank you so much, that was really helpful :smile:
Reply 7
Original post by MagicNMedicine
School / college is quite a different "dating market" from university which is then even more different from "the real world". In the dating markets you progress to as you get older the pettiness disappears, people don't "make fun of you for a lesbian haircut" etc and you find a wider choice of people so its easier to find someone who is more compatible and who likes you.

I know it's frustrating but if you are generally happy with what you are like as a person just try not to feel too down about it now and wait for later as you will have much better chances in the future. When I was at uni I met lots of girls who were attractive and nice but who hadn't really had much experience with guys, usually because they were more of the quieter/academic type.

I'll try and remember that! I am more of the quieter/academic type too so maybe it could simply be that like you said
Reply 8
Original post by Anonymous
watch this, it could really help ^^^


Okay, thank you
As a straight guy who knows how other straight guys work, I'd say it's the hair to be brutally honest. While most of us aren't immature enough to take the piss, I'd say the majority of fellas just don't find short hair attractive on girls. Personally, you could be the prettiest girl in the world, but if you have short hair I wouldn't be attracted to you, simple as that really. Facially you're pretty, I can see that, but I guarantee you'd become a lot more attractive to guys if you had nicely styled long hair :redface:

It's also not the height, guys don't fuss about height really as long as it's not extreme, 5'1'' is pretty normal for a girl :smile:
Reply 10
Original post by WoodyMKC
As a straight guy who knows how other straight guys work, I'd say it's the hair to be brutally honest. While most of us aren't immature enough to take the piss, I'd say the majority of fellas just don't find short hair attractive on girls. Personally, you could be the prettiest girl in the world, but if you have short hair I wouldn't be attracted to you, simple as that really. Facially you're pretty, I can see that, but I guarantee you'd become a lot more attractive to guys if you had nicely styled long hair :redface:

It's also not the height, guys don't fuss about height really as long as it's not extreme, 5'1'' is pretty normal for a girl :smile:

See, even when my hair was longer though it was still always the same. I'm growing it out now anyways as I'm sick of being taken the piss out of. Honestly, longer hair did nothing for me. It just hid my face and with me being so short, made me look as if I was drowning in hair. Long or short hair, the problem has always been the same
Original post by GeekLane
See, even when my hair was longer though it was still always the same. I'm growing it out now anyways as I'm sick of being taken the piss out of. Honestly, longer hair did nothing for me. It just hid my face and with me being so short, made me look as if I was drowning in hair. Long or short hair, the problem has always been the same


Have you tried it shoulder length? Might not suit you being properly long. Might be a good idea to grow it out a bit and then go to a creative stylist at the salon and they'll be able to assess everything and advise you on what sort of hairstyle they think would suit you (as well as cut it).
Reply 12
Original post by WoodyMKC
Have you tried it shoulder length? Might not suit you being properly long. Might be a good idea to grow it out a bit and then go to a creative stylist at the salon and they'll be able to assess everything and advise you on what sort of hairstyle they think would suit you (as well as cut it).

I've had it all lengths in all honesty haha. Waist length, shoulder length, a bob, pixie cut...
The bob and pixie cut suited me best though. They actually show my face instead of keeping it hidden away and with my hair being thin, shorter hair makes it look a little thicker
Original post by GeekLane
I've had it all lengths in all honesty haha. Waist length, shoulder length, a bob, pixie cut...
The bob and pixie cut suited me best though. They actually show my face instead of keeping it hidden away and with my hair being thin, shorter hair makes it look a little thicker


:lol: I can see a bob sort of style suiting you tbf. It's about the cut as well as the length of course though so still totally worth going to see a stylist IMO, once it's grown obviously. The longer hair cut should improve your chances anyway, that's for sure.

This is gonna sound weird as well, but as a guy some girls just look... I don't wanna say unapproachable, but just look like they wouldn't be into being approached. Maybe it's if you try and catch her eye and she doesn't reciprocate and the general facial expressions and body language that give that feel. As I said you look pretty in your pic and I'm not attracted to short hair, but with a feminine hair cut, I'd certainly roll with it if you were to come up and start chatting me up :tongue: Hope that last piece of information was somewhat helpful :rofl:
Reply 14
Original post by WoodyMKC
:lol: I can see a bob sort of style suiting you tbf. It's about the cut as well as the length of course though so still totally worth going to see a stylist IMO, once it's grown obviously. The longer hair cut should improve your chances anyway, that's for sure.

This is gonna sound weird as well, but as a guy some girls just look... I don't wanna say unapproachable, but just look like they wouldn't be into being approached. Maybe it's if you try and catch her eye and she doesn't reciprocate and the general facial expressions and body language that give that feel. As I said you look pretty in your pic and I'm not attracted to short hair, but with a feminine hair cut, I'd certainly roll with it if you were to come up and start chatting me up :tongue: Hope that last piece of information was somewhat helpful :rofl:

Well, the body language part was helpful but I wouldn't exactly say that I have a manly hair cut... Yes it's short but it's still feminine.
Original post by GeekLane
Well, the body language part was helpful but I wouldn't exactly say that I have a manly hair cut... Yes it's short but it's still feminine.


I didn't say it was manly lol, it's just an expression, feminine harcut = long haircut :wink: Can see how it could be construed that way though, sorry :redface:
Reply 16
Original post by GeekLane
It sounds silly to ask but, I don't think I'm exactly ugly, I've been told I'm quite pretty by girls and adults but never guys. I have quite low esteem when it comes to my appearance, so I don't really rate myself too highly but at the same time I know I'm not 100% ugly. I guess I'm a nice person too, I tend to put others before myself and I'm always there for advice when anyone needs it. I work hard at school so, I'm far from stupid to be honest, but I can be quite shy when it comes to approaching people but once I get talking I can talk for hours on end and tend to make people laugh. The only problem is that I'm always the girl who is dismissed by guys. I'm either completely ignored as if I'm invisible or they make fun of me (usually about my hair as apparently it's a "lesbian hair cut" and because of my height as I'm only 5'1") I don't understand what the problem with me is.


How old are you? since you mentioned adults.

I don't know why guys may not like you , don't really know you but on your thumbnail pic you don't look that bad. Don't change yourself just to get guys , be yourself.
Reply 17
Original post by Mancini
How old are you? since you mentioned adults.

I don't know why guys may not like you , don't really know you but on your thumbnail pic you don't look that bad. Don't change yourself just to get guys , be yourself.

I'm 17 but it seems as if the only ones who say nice things about me are either girls my age or adults such as parents and their friends etc. And thank you, it's more to get them off my back really that I'm growing my hair..
Reply 18
Original post by GeekLane
I'm 17 but it seems as if the only ones who say nice things about me are either girls my age or adults such as parents and their friends etc. And thank you, it's more to get them off my back really that I'm growing my hair..


Get who off your back? I'm not sure how growing your hair would do that, long hair is attractive.
Sometimes people just don't think or don't care to complement the opposite sex, sometimes it could be fear that they may take it the wrong way especially in this feminist times.

At 17 you haven't even fully grown, most people grow more beautiful when they hit their 20s not that you are unattractive but you get what I mean. I think what's most important is your character and how you are inside, everything else comes in time.
Reply 19
Original post by Mancini
Get who off your back? I'm not sure how growing your hair would do that, long hair is attractive.
Sometimes people just don't think or don't care to complement the opposite sex, sometimes it could be fear that they may take it the wrong way especially in this feminist times.

At 17 you haven't even fully grown, most people grow more beautiful when they hit their 20s not that you are unattractive but you get what I mean. I think what's most important is your character and how you are inside, everything else comes in time.


What I mean is there's a group of guys that just pick on me purely because of my haircut and make me feel ugly... I'm growing it so they will leave me alone. I guess your right but no one really cares for my personality either. I can't win

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