Has university not lived up to anyone else's expectations? Watch

eggyeol
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#1
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I'm about to start second year on Monday and I just feel so..meh about it all. I like my course but that's just about where the positives end lmao.

This time last year I thought I was going to make loads of friends and have the time of my life but in reality I've made about two good friends and my social life is practically non-existent rip.
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SuperHuman98
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Two good friends is good imo. Quality over quantity. I do feel like fitting in has been hard and I am also going into my 2nd year

Did you try societies/sports last year?
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Anonymous #1
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I started two weeks ago and it definitely is just...Meh. I probably only feel like that because you get so hyped up before you start thinking everything is all fun and friends when in reality it’s not.
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Theo12567
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Don’t you go out every night and party and meet new people in the first 2 weeks?
(Original post by Anonymous)
I started two weeks ago and it definitely is just...Meh. I probably only feel like that because you get so hyped up before you start thinking everything is all fun and friends when in reality it’s not.
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SuperHuman98
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(Original post by Theo12567)
Don’t you go out every night and party and meet new people in the first 2 weeks?
I know lots of people last year who were going out 2-3 times a week nearly every week during first year
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eggyeol
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(Original post by SuperHuman98)
Two good friends is good imo. Quality over quantity. I do feel like fitting in has been hard and I am also going into my 2nd year

Did you try societies/sports last year?
Yeah that's true. I tried two societies. One wasn't that great (inactive, scheduling socials and then randomly cancelling them, etc.) and the other I didn't really end up making friends from it. Gonna try out another one or two this year. How's everything going with you?

(Original post by Anonymous)
I started two weeks ago and it definitely is just...Meh. I probably only feel like that because you get so hyped up before you start thinking everything is all fun and friends when in reality it’s not.
Yeah I always think university is too hyped up but then I go on social media and it just seems like everyone else is having so much fun and I think I must be doing something wrong.

(Original post by Theo12567)
Don’t you go out every night and party and meet new people in the first 2 weeks?
Not a party person so I avoided a lot of the clubbing scene in first year. It's probably why I've struggled to make friends as my uni is known as a ''party uni''. I kinda regret not pushing myself to party more but at the same time I knew I wouldn't have enjoyed it.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Theo12567)
Don’t you go out every night and party and meet new people in the first 2 weeks?
Even the parties can be dead. I went to one in which about 25 people showed up
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SuperHuman98
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(Original post by eggyeol)
Yeah that's true. I tried two societies. One wasn't that great (inactive, scheduling socials and then randomly cancelling them, etc.) and the other I didn't really end up making friends from it. Gonna try out another one or two this year. How's everything going with you?


Not a party person so I avoided a lot of the clubbing scene in first year. It's probably why I've struggled to make friends as my uni is known as a ''party uni''. I kinda regret not pushing myself to party more but at the same time I knew I wouldn't have enjoyed it.
Did you try any sports? I really recommend sports. Societies like course ones can be a bit of a let down I know my course society mainly just does clubbing for its socials. But through Sports you make friends through training, and its easier to find common interests. You also get to keep fit and its great for mental and physical health

I can 100% relate about going to more a party uni. I tried clubbing a few times last year I just didn't enjoy it. I am going to give house parties a try this year if those happen. But I couldn't care less about drinking tbh. I live in a house with those who I know from last year but they are all much closer to each other and have much more in common. I am kinda like an odd one out. Ill see what happens though.
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999tigger
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Although in some ways uni is what you make it on TSR the emphasis is academic prestige and few people mention the social experience of unis. Some unis are just more fun to be at. Ofc for some students social skills or life do not matter.
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Anonymous #2
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(Original post by eggyeol)
This time last year I thought I was going to make loads of friends and have the time of my life but in reality I've made about two good friends and my social life is practically non-existent rip.
don't compare your life with everyone's highlight reels also join societies pls, I'm joining 4 this year, maybe even one more. It's the perfect time to, go to all the tasters and push through the awkwardness if you go alone. also, you could try things like volunteering, setting up your own society or being a part of a committee, society committees are fun, as are socials
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steamed-hams
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It's over hyped because the unis want your money. If they lost the 3 best years stereotype it would be catastrophic so they hammer into our skulls their social media pages and glossy magazine like prospectuses which focus on how a fkin great life style you'll have while being surprising light on course content.

If students are mainly going because they want a good time they're probably better off not going and instead go travelling for a year
Last edited by steamed-hams; 4 weeks ago
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zombgum
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It's been okay. I have social anxiety, so I haven't really made any friends on my course yet. We haven't actually started our pratical/tutorial lessons, which is when our groups will have to work together, so I'm hoping I'll befriend people then. Made 1 - 2 friends in my flat, but it's still early days. I'm painfully shy though, so the party/drinking trope isn't my thing at all and it looks like most people have made friends that way. Bit worried about my workload (mostly all this anatomy I need to know), I'd like to join a society but it's all about finding the time to do so.
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beefboss
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#13
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I always beat myself up for not moving away to university and experiencing the "university life".

Now I'm not sure it would have been any better, especially when I read all these posts.

I was always too busy studying to socialise that much. I got so stressed that even when I was relaxing I was constantly thinking about work and what I needed to do.

University could be good but my experience was ruined by excessive testing (exams, assignments, lab reports etc.), social anxiety and people being aloof.
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Anonymous #3
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Yeah it's not been great. In freshers week I tried to keep busy going to different events and such. Through that I managed to meet and talk to a few new people which felt like an achievement for me as I'm really shy and hardly spoke to anyone during sixth form. However freshers week is basically over now and I'm just sitting in my room feeling lonely and homesick. I've joined some societies but I'm not sure how much help they'll be.. I feel like I should join a sports one as it might be easier to socialise there but I'm not very good at sports and I missed out on all the sports events in freshers. I feel like there's something really fundamentally wrong with my personality that stops me being able to make friends with people, and I'm getting scared that's never going to change. My flatmates are ok but I feel like the more social ones are starting to reject me and even with the others I struggle to get past boring small talk. I feel trapped and I really hope things get better rather than worse once my course starts.
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lou2471
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(Original post by eggyeol)
I'm about to start second year on Monday and I just feel so..meh about it all. I like my course but that's just about where the positives end lmao.

This time last year I thought I was going to make loads of friends and have the time of my life but in reality I've made about two good friends and my social life is practically non-existent rip.
yeah I feel the same, starting second year next week too; I love living with mates away from home but honestly really don't like my course and have no friends on it, so I get bored a lot. I think uni gets so hyped up to people applying, especially when asking how older friends/siblings' experiences of it are, I went there with so many expectations that through first year I was a bit like... is this really all it is lol
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Anonymous #4
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Yes I felt like this too. So many people hyped uni up for me saying it’s all fun and you get to do so much etc but then I went and it was okay. Like nothing too special and definitely don’t think it’ll be the best years of my life either
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DefaultStudent
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Yeah it's not been great. In freshers week I tried to keep busy going to different events and such. Through that I managed to meet and talk to a few new people which felt like an achievement for me as I'm really shy and hardly spoke to anyone during sixth form. However freshers week is basically over now and I'm just sitting in my room feeling lonely and homesick. I've joined some societies but I'm not sure how much help they'll be.. I feel like I should join a sports one as it might be easier to socialise there but I'm not very good at sports and I missed out on all the sports events in freshers. I feel like there's something really fundamentally wrong with my personality that stops me being able to make friends with people, and I'm getting scared that's never going to change. My flatmates are ok but I feel like the more social ones are starting to reject me and even with the others I struggle to get past boring small talk. I feel trapped and I really hope things get better rather than worse once my course starts.
Can I ask what uni you're at? (I've had the exact same experience)
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Anonymous #3
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(Original post by DefaultStudent)
Can I ask what uni you're at? (I've had the exact same experience)
In the south west
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Pablo22510
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#19
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Yeah it's not been great. In freshers week I tried to keep busy going to different events and such. Through that I managed to meet and talk to a few new people which felt like an achievement for me as I'm really shy and hardly spoke to anyone during sixth form. However freshers week is basically over now and I'm just sitting in my room feeling lonely and homesick. I've joined some societies but I'm not sure how much help they'll be.. I feel like I should join a sports one as it might be easier to socialise there but I'm not very good at sports and I missed out on all the sports events in freshers. I feel like there's something really fundamentally wrong with my personality that stops me being able to make friends with people, and I'm getting scared that's never going to change. My flatmates are ok but I feel like the more social ones are starting to reject me and even with the others I struggle to get past boring small talk. I feel trapped and I really hope things get better rather than worse once my course starts.
Big oof. I feel you, bro. All the best for the near future. You'll make it. I hope it doesn't happen to me when i get in next year, but I know it is. Just a question: how important would you say attending parties and drinking alcohol is to uni social life? I avoid the first if possible and don't touch the latter, but I'm afraid that won't be possible at uni.
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fefssdf
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having graduated this year I have to admit univeristy was not the ' time of my life' and the best times I have had have occurred outside of my university when I have been able to travel to other places, and graduate life has been more fun than uni was tbh
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