Guys- would you date a girl with no social life

To me it genuinely doesnt matter at all.

I’ve been getting in a bit of a paranoid state about this for a while now and I really want a male perspective on this.

Imagine you meet a girl and you feel like you get on well ect and go for a few dates but then after a while you realise that this girl doesn’t seem to have much of a social ‘ circle ‘ and doesn’t seem to do much in terms of socialising. She doesn’t mention any friends and you end up realising that it’s because she’s just doesn’t really have many mates. Perhaps she talks to a few people every now and then but let’s say it was her birthday.. she wouldn’t have a party or do anything cause she doesn’t have like a group of mates or an individual who would want to come and celebrate it with her.

Would this bother you as someone dating this girl or would you not have an issue with it. Like if you realise that effectively you are this girl’s entire social life.

It’s silly I guess but the reason I ask is I feel like whenever I am dating a guy or things seem to be getting a bit more serious I feel like they will just assume I have some friends at least and I’ve even ended up lying on occasion about what I’m up to like when they ask me when I’m free for another date like I might say like oh I’m gonna see my mate on say Wednesday so it looks like I have somewhat of a ‘ life ‘.

I’ve never had a boyfriend so I don’t really know like how things would be if I was seeing someone and it was super serious but they were aware of the fact I didn’t like have mates to do stuff with.

What about when it gets super serious too like when you guys are like gonna get married then what happens when it comes to writing the guest list and the only friends are gonna be the guy’s mates or like maybe 1 or 2 people max that you consider a mate or at least an acquaintance. I feel like it would be so awkward and embarrassing to end up in that situation.

Or maybe this isn’t as weird as I make out.

I’ve always found it really tough to make friends and establish relationships with people but I am quite confident when it comes to dating, but I have this intense fear that my inability to have any real sense of social life is gonna just mean guys will pull away from me.

Sorry for the ramble but I’m just trying to see if anyone else can relate on this or offer a different perspective?

I'd be concerned as to why you have not been able to maintain friends and would question this.

You had the whole of secondary, college, univeristy, work friends, family friends etc.

I'd be concerned as to why you have not been able to maintain friends and would question this.

You had the whole of secondary, college, univeristy, work friends, family friends etc.

Why would you be concerned? Maybe she’s been bullied all her life and never given a chance? Maybe she’s been misunderstood, it doesn’t mean she doesn’t deserve to find someone and should not be judged for that

Well I too 'lack' an extensive social life but that doesn't get me down because I don't want an extensive social life because I also, like you, find it hard making relationships with people for various reasons.

Thing is, none of that ever gets me down, nor do I apologize for it or pretend I have an amazing social life because it shouldn't matter. If you don't feel comfortable with that stuff then you shouldn't feel bad. The same goes for a relationship and the person you are dating should probably be dating you because of you, rather than your social life if you see what I mean.

Introversion and the lack of a need to make friends to feel happy

It could reflect on her personality eg. she's toxic and hence has not been able to keep friends. Like I mentioned I'd like to know the reasons as to why she was not able to hold friends. Ofc, I would still give her a chance but a persons friends does speak volumes about them.

Hey! Don’t worry I think I understand what you’re saying, and it’s really helpful to know I’m not the only one who struggles with maintaining those sorts of relationships, but yeh you’re right I guess you can somewhat separate friendships out from relationships in a sense, so I should probably try not to compare too much if the guy has such an extensive social life.

My type tends to be really outgoing confident type of people who always seem to be super sociable, so it’s hard to feel like I’m not the only one who struggles with the whole social life thing. Its only actually when I started dating properly that I started to feel down about my social life as before then I was content with just chatting to people every now and then but not having any real need to make plans with people ect

A person shouldn’t be judged based on friends, how would you know it’s because she’s toxic and not because she hasn’t been fully understood by people and/or bullied as I stated before?

I'd be concerned as to why you have not been able to maintain friends and would question this.

You had the whole of secondary, college, univeristy, work friends, family friends etc.