The Student Room Group

How do you compliment a woman without coming across as weird or creepy?

Alright,

I've been completely alone style single since 2013 (things on, baggage, mental health, needed to be alone for a bit etc) and haven't even had sex in that time, literally for 7 years. In that time I've completely forgotten how to be nice to/compliment women in a way that they understand my interest but that doesn't seem creepy.

I'm known as something of a wordsmith, but when it comes to saying something nice about someone in a way which formally registers my interest, my mind is a sudden blank and I am suddenly somehow devoid of all relevant adjectives.

The most I can think of are things like "stunning", "I like your picture" and "you look nice", all of which sound a bit wet and drippy and which manage to avoid saying anything especially complimentary whilst nonetheless saying something other than "oh". I always sort of imagine it from the woman's point of view and whether or not it will make things weird between us.

Anyway, I've finally found a woman I'm very attracted to and she seems to be somewhat into me - but I don't know how to compliment her in a way which will sound heartfelt and appreciated and not work in the way of creeping or otherwise repulsing her.

Can the more prolific daters among you lend me an ear, brain and hand? Cheers.
i probably wouldn't compliment someone who's not a friend. putting someone on a potentially uncalled for and uncomfortable pedestal isn't a good opener

compliments tend to be easy to come across once you're into the conversation already: "i went shopping the other and got [this]" "oh it's lovely, where from?"

without being too rude, looking for a heartfelt compliment (to any stretch of the word heartfelt) is probably how to come off as creepy because, if you're only talking, you're not meant to express strong feelings yet because it leads to the other person feeling obligated to either match the feelings or leave
Original post by Clez
Alright,

I've been completely alone style single since 2013 (things on, baggage, mental health, needed to be alone for a bit etc) and haven't even had sex in that time, literally for 7 years. In that time I've completely forgotten how to be nice to/compliment women in a way that they understand my interest but that doesn't seem creepy.

I'm known as something of a wordsmith, but when it comes to saying something nice about someone in a way which formally registers my interest, my mind is a sudden blank and I am suddenly somehow devoid of all relevant adjectives.

The most I can think of are things like "stunning", "I like your picture" and "you look nice", all of which sound a bit wet and drippy and which manage to avoid saying anything especially complimentary whilst nonetheless saying something other than "oh". I always sort of imagine it from the woman's point of view and whether or not it will make things weird between us.

Anyway, I've finally found a woman I'm very attracted to and she seems to be somewhat into me - but I don't know how to compliment her in a way which will sound heartfelt and appreciated and not work in the way of creeping or otherwise repulsing her.

Can the more prolific daters among you lend me an ear, brain and hand? Cheers.

from reading this i see that u r a bit rusty in complimenting women
u could perhaps look online tips on how to compliment women on different websites
u have to treat her nicely and even if u do come out as a bit creepy - dw just say it was a midunderstanding
compliment her features but also say that the personality matters more than the looks u know?
u will get back to it
blessings from Raptor Jesus:angelwings:
Reply 3
Complimenting their body directly can come across as weird. "I love your style" is IMO less creepy than "Nice eyes". Basically you want to avoid making them seem like an object.
Reply 4
Original post by HoldThisL
i probably wouldn't compliment someone who's not a friend. putting someone on a potentially uncalled for and uncomfortable pedestal isn't a good opener

compliments tend to be easy to come across once you're into the conversation already: "i went shopping the other and got [this]" "oh it's lovely, where from?"

without being too rude, looking for a heartfelt compliment (to any stretch of the word heartfelt) is probably how to come off as creepy because, if you're only talking, you're not meant to express strong feelings yet because it leads to the other person feeling obligated to either match the feelings or leave


I already know her, I used to work with her and have her on Facebook. She does seem to be into me from what I (and others) have observed, she's been video calling me over lockdown and keeps sending me pictures of her holding phallic-shaped objects from around her house and various suggestive memes, so I don't think compliments are too out of the question. I just mean - for example - she uploaded a new picture etc - so not out of the blue.
Original post by Clez
I already know her, I used to work with her and have her on Facebook. She does seem to be into me from what I (and others) have observed, she's been video calling me over lockdown and keeps sending me pictures of her holding phallic-shaped objects from around her house and various suggestive memes, so I don't think compliments are too out of the question. I just mean - for example - she uploaded a new picture etc - so not out of the blue.

like an ig post? complimenting her directly rathering than commenting would be easier. read the mood: are you both joking around? you can probably get away with calling her something more explicit that's clearly not a passing comment, like hot (if you'd say that), if not then you'd have to be more neutral ("really nice", "attractive")



Spoiler

I think compliments about her personality can be nicer than compliments about her looks, it seems like you view her in a better way than just being good looking, and anyone can tell her she is good looking. Even better if it's a personality trait that most people wouldn't notice.
You can use emojis on Instagram to comment
Reply 9
Always be honest with what you're saying and perhaps just make observations about her appearance, that will show you are really looking. For me I always value that more than someone telling me I'm beautiful/attractive. Someone noticing my freckles, the particular shade of my eye colour, whether I'm wearing contacts or not, the shape of my lips, the particular shade of my skin...that's the kind of thing I remember and that I really feel as a true compliment. Also people have used the word special, like they have said "there is something special about your beauty"...that was like wow to me. But just say something that you mean and it doesn't have to be a conventional compliment.
Original post by Clez
I already know her, I used to work with her and have her on Facebook. She does seem to be into me from what I (and others) have observed, she's been video calling me over lockdown and keeps sending me pictures of her holding phallic-shaped objects from around her house and various suggestive memes, so I don't think compliments are too out of the question. I just mean - for example - she uploaded a new picture etc - so not out of the blue.

Pretend you did not notice her body but compliment her choice of object or clothing or furnishings if you want her to want you more

She already likes you, no need to go overboard
(edited 3 years ago)
I see your dilemma and after a while the generic adjectives like beautiful, gorgeous or stunning gets a bit repetitive. But at the same time if you don't compliment them then they may question your interest or intentions. I'd say the best compliment I received was when the guy called me beautiful; but it was his response after I thanked him for the compliment that stuck with me which was "I wouldn't call it a compliment, more rather an observation more than anything". Idk, I think it was because he stated it almost as if it was a fact rather than opinion...
(edited 3 years ago)
Okay so I'm literally the best in this. You definitely came to the right place to ask. So,

lets say she upload a nice picture ok? What do you do?

You get a bit hyped up and you jump up and down a bit, walk back and forth in your small room... and now you're ready to compliment her

What do you say? =>

You: Hey
Her: Hey
You: Are you sure you're in the right place?
Her: Wdym?!
You: I heard that Tesco is missing a sugar bag from one of their shelves so I was wondering if it was you :wink:
Her: Omg!!! Cutieee, are you implying that I'm the sugar bag?
You: Yes, smart-ass! Wasn't that the sweetest thing (pun = intended)

BAM. Punch. Fckng. Line! You got her. Next thing you know? You're married, living in a small town house, three wee bairns runnin' around and you're both sipping on your martinis watching the sunset.
I don't.

1. Doesn't help anything.
2. Makes things worse.
3. You can be accused of sexual assault and have your reputation, life and career ruined.
I don't want
anybody else
when i think about you
i touch myself
‘You always look nice in blue’

Quick Reply

Latest

Trending

Trending