I'm worried I am ugly

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Anonymous #1
#1
Report Thread starter 1 month ago
#1
I can't seem to get many dates on dating apps/matches, or many replies.
I've only ever been on dates with 3 girls (that i knew irl) and they've always decided not to go out with me
The latest one ghosted me but I had a thoughtful date or something she liked and made her laugh so i am not sure
I'm 22 and male and honestly If I can't get a girlfriend, how will I ever own a home?
Plus I am genuinly a lot happier when I am dating a girl/do things date wise.... Otherwise I get depressed constantly over having no job or girlfriend.
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Moana92
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#2
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#2
Does it matter as long as you're a good person? Real girls will over go for qualities like personality and honesty, trust, potential etc over looks. It's only girls who are shallow themselves which are bothered about looks
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ecolier
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#3
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I can't seem to get many dates on dating apps/matches, or many replies.
I've only ever been on dates with 3 girls (that i knew irl) and they've always decided not to go out with me
The latest one ghosted me but I had a thoughtful date or something she liked and made her laugh so i am not sure
I'm 22 and male and honestly If I can't get a girlfriend, how will I ever own a home?
Plus I am genuinly a lot happier when I am dating a girl/do things date wise.... Otherwise I get depressed constantly over having no job or girlfriend.
Owning a home is completely different to getting a girlfriend...

Concentrate on your career. If you're successful you'll be confident and you'll find it easier to meet other people.

Otherwise you'll end up jobless and relationship-less.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by ecolier)
Owning a home is completely differIent to getting a girlfriend...
Those are the two things I worry about, along with getting a job.
But I am so much happier if I have a girl I date.... and miserable otherwise as I feel like an abject failure.
The last one has just stopped replying after we had a good date and after any date I always think "oh, well I'll probably never get a gf anyway as they don't like me".... and its just horrible.
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vix.xvi
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#5
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#5
trust me ur not ugly
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ecolier
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Those are the two things I worry about, along with getting a job.
But I am so much happier if I have a girl I date.... and miserable otherwise as I feel like an abject failure.
The last one has just stopped replying after we had a good date and after any date I always think "oh, well I'll probably never get a gf anyway as they don't like me".... and its just horrible.
For a large part of my career so far I have been single and find that it was easier to advance and work being a single person.

Plus think how much money you'll save :lol:

You do you though.
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username5454672
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Your life does not hinge on being in a relationship, I’m single and happy with my life - honestly it keeps me more focused with work. Your 22 it’s still very young, focus on your career.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by EwanAdams)
Your life does not hinge on being in a relationship, I’m single and happy with my life - honestly it keeps me more focused with work. Your 22 it’s still very young, focus on your career.
That's another problem, I've applied for thousands of jobs over the past year and had about 20/30 interviews to the final bit-never gotten offered one. Seriously concerned I may never get a job and I'll have to remove myself from life. Especially with the ****ed economy now-i could just end up long-term unemployed with a 1st in Economics lol I have no confidence anymore or happiness-except when I'm drunk. And the girl thing also adds to that.
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username5454672
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(Original post by Anonymous)
That's another problem, I've applied for thousands of jobs over the past year and had about 20/30 interviews to the final bit-never gotten offered one. Seriously concerned I may never get a job and I'll have to remove myself from life. Especially with the ****ed economy now-i could just end up long-term unemployed with a 1st in Economics lol I have no confidence anymore or happiness-except when I'm drunk. And the girl thing also adds to that.
The job market is tough for everyone unfortunately but if you stick at it you will get their. Have you looked at internships with banks?
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Anonymous #2
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(Original post by Anonymous)
That's another problem, I've applied for thousands of jobs over the past year and had about 20/30 interviews to the final bit-never gotten offered one. Seriously concerned I may never get a job and I'll have to remove myself from life. Especially with the ****ed economy now-i could just end up long-term unemployed with a 1st in Economics lol I have no confidence anymore or happiness-except when I'm drunk. And the girl thing also adds to that.
My brother's in a similar position w/ the job market. He's also 22 and has like a 2:1 from Cambridge in languages, and has also been applying for law vac schemes + civil services stuff for several months, sending 4-5 applications a day (like those really long ones) in some months. Not trying to make this about him/ being annoying or braggy, just saying don't take it too personally on the job search front (:
Would it be possible for you to do a masters/ further study rn to improve job prospects?
There's also so many jobs you may not have considered before that you'd probs be really good at, like there's this new training scheme for uni grads to become detectives without being an officer first (just a random example).
Pls don't give up hope! I'm sure ur a great guy and there's defo someone out there for u xx
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Anonymous #3
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People say when u aren’t happy single u won’t be happy in a relationship sooo..
Keep urself busy and work on yourself. Maybe start a side hustle or something. You are only 22 so u r still really young. Spend more time with yourself, friends and family.
The right girl will come to u one day. Don’t stop searching but don’t actively search for someone that way u r going to have low expectations and u deserve better.

Good luck xx
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CactiQueen
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#12
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As a 22 year old girl I worry about this too. i like to think I will eventually find someone who dates me because i am fun to be around and kind. looks fade
(Original post by Anonymous)
I can't seem to get many dates on dating apps/matches, or many replies.
I've only ever been on dates with 3 girls (that i knew irl) and they've always decided not to go out with me
The latest one ghosted me but I had a thoughtful date or something she liked and made her laugh so i am not sure
I'm 22 and male and honestly If I can't get a girlfriend, how will I ever own a home?
Plus I am genuinly a lot happier when I am dating a girl/do things date wise.... Otherwise I get depressed constantly over having no job or girlfriend.
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Jebedee
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#13
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#13
You didn't provide a pic so it's very hard to judge. An important factor is whether perceived physical unattractiveness is a product of nature or mismanagement/apathy. If you're effectively managing factors that are within your control then you can focus on that, rather than the things that aren't.

I'd be cautious with any advice that includes the word "should", as these tend to pertain to how the person thinks the world should be, rather than what it actually is.
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netflix84
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#14
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I can't seem to get many dates on dating apps/matches, or many replies.
I've only ever been on dates with 3 girls (that i knew irl) and they've always decided not to go out with me
The latest one ghosted me but I had a thoughtful date or something she liked and made her laugh so i am not sure
I'm 22 and male and honestly If I can't get a girlfriend, how will I ever own a home?
Plus I am genuinly a lot happier when I am dating a girl/do things date wise.... Otherwise I get depressed constantly over having no job or girlfriend.
tbh you're young and you've got some time to figure stuff out
and if these girls are judging purely based on looks then id say you've dodged a few bullets there.
also forcing it too hard never works- just let it happen
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