How do I repair my relationship with my sister?

My sister is 36 and I am 19. During my childhood my sister and I were really close- I felt like I could talk to her about anything, we always got on, always went out together and she always bought me things. It truly was the perfect relationship. I remember when she got married for the first time (she was 24 and I was 7) how sad I got at the end of the wedding ceremony when she had to leave with my former brother in law to their new home- I was just so upset about losing her and not having her with me, but eventually I got over it.

But as I got older, I started to realise how snappy and mean my sister could be. When she had her first baby in 2016 (and I was 13) me and my mom went to visit her two weeks after she was born. My sister wanted to run a bath for my niece using a large bowel as she was quite small. I went to go get the bowel and fill it right up with warm water. As the bowel was quite heavy, a bit of the water dropped on the floor. My sister was visibly annoyed and she said to my mum 'Doesn't she know how to do anything?'. It really hurt my feelings, hearing her say that but I didn't retaliate or say anything back to her. I continued to love her like I did before.

She does help me at times- like helping me with my UCAS application and my interview. But whenever I speak to her, her tone can be quite condescending (e.g. why wouldn't you do this instead, I'm your older sister, I deserve respect).

I remember during Eid in 2021, my sister and my niece who was 4 came over. I was playing with my niece and pretending to sleep just to entertain her- my sister didn't like that I pretended to sleep (to this day I still don't understand why) and she snapped at me telling me 'just relax, what's wrong with you?' Again I didn't say anything back to her (starting to regret not doing so). I kind of just stopping speaking to her for a while and she didn't speak to me either- I just didn't like the way she made me feel but I felt like confronting her would just escalate the situation.

During this period my sister would talk to my mum and dad a lot. She would tell her that 'I don't speak to her, I'm being really unfair and that my mum loves me more than she loves her (which is not true). I forgot to add my sister's a GP- she does tend to act like she knows better than my mum and dad and always thinks that she's right and never does wrong.

At the start of January, my sister texted me asking if my dad was ok and asking me to call him to see if he was alright. I did so but first I asked my mum if she had spoken to my dad that day. My mom asked me 'who's asking'? I told her that my sister was asking. My mum is already aware that my relationship with my sister is pretty strained- she asked me if my sister asked me how I was doing first, to which I honestly replied no. I don't think I should have done that because the following weekend my mum went to visit my sister and basically told her about the situation and asked my sister why our relationship was so strained. I really wish my mum hadn't done that because its just ruined our relationship even more.

I got a call from my sister that evening- I had a feeling that something wasn't right- at first my sister was pretty polite but soon she flew into a rage. She told me that she was extremely disappointed in me. She then went on to say that it seemed like I wasn't interested in a relationship with her or my niece (this did kind of bring me to tears but I hid it from her because I loved her and my nieces TO DEATH). She then went on to say that I needed to respect her as though she was mom. She even demanded an apology from me- throughout that telephone call, I could just feel the guilt and sadness rising because it honestly felt like that was the end of our relationship. I kept telling her that I loved her, I wanted a good relationship with her but she kept dismissing that telling me 'I honestly don't think you love me, I'm really disappointed in you, you've been a terrible sister' and then told me to reflect on my actions before hanging up.

She's my only sister and I love her with all my heart but I honestly don't know what to do to make things right guys. If anyone has helpful words, please provide them for me.

Thanks x

My sister is 36 and I am 19. During my childhood my sister and I were really close- I felt like I could talk to her about anything, we always got on, always went out together and she always bought me things. It truly was the perfect relationship. I remember when she got married for the first time (she was 24 and I was 7) how sad I got at the end of the wedding ceremony when she had to leave with my former brother in law to their new home- I was just so upset about losing her and not having her with me, but eventually I got over it.

But as I got older, I started to realise how snappy and mean my sister could be. When she had her first baby in 2016 (and I was 13) me and my mom went to visit her two weeks after she was born. My sister wanted to run a bath for my niece using a large bowel as she was quite small. I went to go get the bowel and fill it right up with warm water. As the bowel was quite heavy, a bit of the water dropped on the floor. My sister was visibly annoyed and she said to my mum 'Doesn't she know how to do anything?'. It really hurt my feelings, hearing her say that but I didn't retaliate or say anything back to her. I continued to love her like I did before.

She does help me at times- like helping me with my UCAS application and my interview. But whenever I speak to her, her tone can be quite condescending (e.g. why wouldn't you do this instead, I'm your older sister, I deserve respect).

I remember during Eid in 2021, my sister and my niece who was 4 came over. I was playing with my niece and pretending to sleep just to entertain her- my sister didn't like that I pretended to sleep (to this day I still don't understand why) and she snapped at me telling me 'just relax, what's wrong with you?' Again I didn't say anything back to her (starting to regret not doing so). I kind of just stopping speaking to her for a while and she didn't speak to me either- I just didn't like the way she made me feel but I felt like confronting her would just escalate the situation.

During this period my sister would talk to my mum and dad a lot. She would tell her that 'I don't speak to her, I'm being really unfair and that my mum loves me more than she loves her (which is not true). I forgot to add my sister's a GP- she does tend to act like she knows better than my mum and dad and always thinks that she's right and never does wrong.

At the start of January, my sister texted me asking if my dad was ok and asking me to call him to see if he was alright. I did so but first I asked my mum if she had spoken to my dad that day. My mom asked me 'who's asking'? I told her that my sister was asking. My mum is already aware that my relationship with my sister is pretty strained- she asked me if my sister asked me how I was doing first, to which I honestly replied no. I don't think I should have done that because the following weekend my mum went to visit my sister and basically told her about the situation and asked my sister why our relationship was so strained. I really wish my mum hadn't done that because its just ruined our relationship even more.

I got a call from my sister that evening- I had a feeling that something wasn't right- at first my sister was pretty polite but soon she flew into a rage. She told me that she was extremely disappointed in me. She then went on to say that it seemed like I wasn't interested in a relationship with her or my niece (this did kind of bring me to tears but I hid it from her because I loved her and my nieces TO DEATH). She then went on to say that I needed to respect her as though she was mom. She even demanded an apology from me- throughout that telephone call, I could just feel the guilt and sadness rising because it honestly felt like that was the end of our relationship. I kept telling her that I loved her, I wanted a good relationship with her but she kept dismissing that telling me 'I honestly don't think you love me, I'm really disappointed in you, you've been a terrible sister' and then told me to reflect on my actions before hanging up.

She's my only sister and I love her with all my heart but I honestly don't know what to do to make things right guys. If anyone has helpful words, please provide them for me.

Thanks x