Stressed about future and career advice needed

I am constantly stressed about my future and career, I think about it everyday and get really down about it all. Last year I was studying animation, I only completed one year of the degree and dropped out because I realised I didn’t want to do that as a career. In some ways I feel good about realising it wasn’t right for me and getting a step closer to finding out what I’m passionate about but then I also feel stupid for dropping out.

I’m 21 in 3 months and feel so behind. I started my previous degree at 19 because I had a gap year before uni- during my gap year I completed an art foundation to help me decide about what degree to apply for. After dropping out of uni at 20 and living back at home with my parents I feel like such a loser. I’ve applied for uni again for commercial photography- but honestly I can’t say whole heartedly it’s what I want to do. I feel so silly for not knowing what I want to do for work and feel like the clocks ticking and worried I’ll soon be too old to make anything of my life. I know it sounds drastic that I’m only 20 and worried but I thought I would know by this age two years ago when I finished my a levels.

My parents tell me uni isn’t everything, and they’re right but i can’t get over worrying about whether I should go back to uni or not. I could have another year out and apply again next year, but I have no life living back home. All of my friends are at uni/ abroad, they ask me what I’ve been up to and my life is so dull- I actually avoid talking to friends because I’ve become embarrassed by my current situation. I do have a job- work 30 hours a week in retail and earning and getting some work experience is nice. But yeah, I know I shouldn’t go to uni just because I want to have a more exciting life again but I also feel like I’m wasting my time at home too.

Overall I feel so conflicted about it all- i worry because I’m creative and creative degrees don’t often lead to jobs. I’ve had a look at creative apprenticeships but they’re all in London and I live in Somerset and could not afford to move to London on my own, rent etc is so expensive even if I was earning £20k a year for an apprenticeship it wouldn’t be enough.

Does anyone with experience of worrying about careers have some advice?

Thanks

Reply 1

Yipiyap_Matthew

Official Rep

I understand how you feel entirely - and the first thing I would say is that in terms of career, you are very young.

I've also spent my twenties without a clear direction. I don't have any clearer picture at nearly-29-years-old of what job would make me most happy - but I'm not really sure that matters much any more. I've found work I enjoy, and I'll just keep following that thread.

So if this answer is rambling, it's only because it's a matter close to my own heart! 🤦

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Don't worry about comparisons - they're not very useful!

I wouldn't stress about comparing yourself to your peers - firstly, just because it's not very helpful! The only thing that will get you closer to finding the perfect path is to think about your own next steps, not anyone else's.

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Even people who stick on the "correct" path don't know if it'll lead to happiness.

More than comparisons not being helpful, though, neither you or your peers can know which routes will lead to success ahead of time.

You're confident that your course wasn't the right one, and that's great. Who's to say how many people your age are still at uni only because they didn't have the bravery to make the same decision? Who knows how many will struggle to land a graduate role, including people on your old course? And how many will land graduate jobs, only to discover they're unfulfilled?

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Finding the right life takes time - in fact, absolutely ages!

Career satisfaction (and in a broader sense, life satisfaction) involve an enormous amount of trial and error. I don't think it's remotely unusual to spend your whole twenties (and beyond!) exploring and discovering - and the idea that an eighteen year old can accurately guess which uni course and career path will make them happy is pretty crazy.

You say you're uncertain, but I see that as being honest with yourself that you don't have all the answers. That's a really good thing - some people will set their sights on a goal and refuse to admit to themselves if it's not as good as they'd hoped.

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Working as an "artist" isn't the only way to be an artist.

I didn't pursue a creative degree, even though I love art. But I've ended up finding a job where I can use my creativity every day. You can also fulfil your creative needs outside of work - that's what I did until now. In fact, my dad has just retired and now spends all day painting - you don't need a career as an artist to make art.

You'll can spend the next 5, 10, or 20 years exploring what REALLY works for you - not just what the 18-year-old version of you imagined would be good.

This is the start of that experimentation - good luck, have fun, and try not to stress over it!
Matthew (Yipiyap gap year rep)

(edited 10 months ago)