How long did it take you to make good friends at uni?

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Reply 40

blancohead

Original post by Octohedral

Thanks, that's really nice of you :redface:

Let's both try to make friends with people at uni this year...

I could achieve that with you :smile:

i am currently trying my best to make friends here also.

Reply 41

SpiritedAway

2 - 3 weeks. I met my friends on my course rather than freshers' week :smile:

Reply 42

kirsty142

Took me over a year-with one exception-to find people who I'd class as good friends, made coming back to uni for third year so much better :smile:

Reply 43

SoulfulBoy

Original post by Octohedral

Okay, just me then. Thanks anyway. :biggrin:

I would like you to PM from time to time telling me how you doing with the getting somoe friends stuff. :smile:

Reply 44

boromir9111

about the second week......

Reply 45

k3ro

Original post by lustina

So how did you go about making into proper friends once you'd met them?

This is the best advice I can give anyone: once you've talked to them and made somewhat 'friends' with them, GET THEIR MOBILE NUMBER. Otherwise you'll probably never see them again.

Out of all the people I met, the only ones that 'stuck' were the ones who swapped numbers with me. I kept in contact with them, and we invited each other out to places etc and we ended up sticking together during freshers, and consequently afterwards.

The worst thing you can do is sit in your room and be bored. You don't have to go out drinking, just find someone like-minded and chill with them.

Hope this helps and hope you're all enjoying uni.

Reply 46

Lucyyy

To be honest, the 3 people I'm closest to now (my best male friend, best female friend and my boyfriend) I all met in the first week - however, most people who I'm now good friends with beyond this I initially met early on, but didn't get really close to until late in the second or third semester. I worried at the start that I wasn't really getting to know many people (beyond the initial 3), and that I was doing something horribly wrong, but no.. all in good time :smile:

Reply 47

skeanos

Basically:

If your halls 10 seconds
If your not a considerable flipping longer time because people are obsessed with halls.

Reply 48

Octohedral

Original post by blancohead

I could achieve that with you :smile:

i am currently trying my best to make friends here also.

Okay, it's a challenge :biggrin:

Which university are you at?

Reply 49

Elanor92

tbh most of my close friends here have come from talking on facebook to people at the same college then meeting up with them in person. I just spent 3 evenings with people i had originally met through facebook just add people with similar interests and start a natter going. You don't have to have deep conversations me and my friends normally talk about surface stuff at the moment none of us know each other amazingly well.

Reply 50

Cicerao

I set the friendship bar very high in my first year. Just small-talk or sitting next to someone in lectures does not qualify as friendship to me, although I know it does for others. So last year I thought, I have no friends. Then when I came back after the summer, someone said, "I missed you!" And then I realised, hey, I talk to her a lot and we get along well, maybe she is my friend. And then I had a great time talking to some people, and I really think I'll be their friend. So I'm loosening up over who I class as a friend. It's great. I'm in second year, by the way. So it's been a year before I let myself believe I have friends. I probably actually made them before that. :tongue:

Reply 51

sr90

Volunteer Team

All these people saying Freshers week/day 1 are really getting me worried. I honestly think i've missed the deadline for making friends :frown:

I've made such an effort talking to people but it never goes anywhere and it always ends with them running off to people they are friends with and i'm lucky to see them again. Honestly don't know what to do because i really have tried and still haven't got anywhere. Am i just a horrible person who nobody likes talking to?

Absolutely everyone in my halls seems to have a group of friends and i'm the odd one out always having to walk to campus etc on my own. Everyone on my course is chatting away like their BFF's too and once again i'm the odd one out. I'm trying to keep smiling and be positive but its getting harder and harder. Its making me feel so useless and lonely and i can't take much more of this,

(edited 12 years ago)

Reply 52

BioFurMatPhyStudent

Original post by sr90

All these people saying Freshers week/day 1 are really getting me worried. I honestly think i've missed the deadline for making friends :frown:

I've made such an effort talking to people but it never goes anywhere and it always ends with them running off to people they are friends with and i'm lucky to see them again. Honestly don't know what to do because i really have tried and haven't got anywhere. Am i just a horrible person who nobody likes talking to?

Absolutely everyone in my halls seems to have a group of friends and i'm the odd one out always having to walk to campus etc on my own. Everyone on my course is chatting away like their BFF's too. Its making me feel so useless and lonely.

Of course not!
Any Sports or Societies you like? I think they're going to help me a lot! :awesome:

Reply 53

The Dynamic Uno

I lucked out and am cool with all 7 of my flatmates.

Edit: Negs, really? Are some of you that sad? And you wonder why you can't make friends...

(edited 12 years ago)

Reply 54

bearfaced

I have one really good friend who I see outside of uni often. A couple of others who are not so close but may meet up with sometimes, And about 20 facebook friends that I know well enough to have a brief chat to and say hello to but that's it. I'd never go out on nights out or see them socially outside uni with these people, not because I don't like them but because I am quite quiet and have never got to know them and now they are all in their little cliques.

I'm a mature student and live at home.

Reply 55

yunghamz

Original post by sr90

All these people saying Freshers week/day 1 are really getting me worried. I honestly think i've missed the deadline for making friends :frown:

Join the club :frown:

Reply 56

drfaustus

I've been at uni for a week and a bit. my flat is set out so that all the guys (including myself) are on the bottom floor, with 6 of us. There's also 6 girls above us and 7 above them.

Personally, I wouldn't say that I'm 'best mates' with any of the guys. They're all nice people, I don't hate them - I would call us friends, we can have a decent conversation - we're just a bit different and I know that two of them in particular are getting along a lot better than I am with anyone else here. It's a bit unnerving. I get along a little better with the girls - but it's still the same situation. I don't feel the ice has broken between me and any of them completely yet

Having said as such, I've made mates with a guy on my course and his flatmates and they're absolute legends, we get on well :smile:

So don't stress it, people will turn up. It's just time. I still feel a little lonely quite a lot, but it's nothing terrible. Patience is the key :smile:

Reply 57

SoulfulBoy

I don't live at halls so it is quite more difficult to make friends.

GOLDEN RULES FOR FRESHERS WITH NO FRIENDS

-JOIN AT LEAST 5 SOCIETIES AND 5 SPORTS CLUBS
-ATTEND EVERY SOCIAL EVENT (DON'T WORRY ABOUT GOING BY YOURSELF, GROW SOME BALLS)
-SMILE TO PEOPLE, IF THEY SMILE BACK, TALK TO THEM
-BE HELPFUL
-SU BAR NIGHTS. YOU MUST ALWAYS BE THERE!!
-UNI FACEBOOK GROUP? USE IT TO "POP ALONG" OR GET SOME PEOPLE TO GO WITH YOU TO SOCIAL EVENTS
-NEVER DECLINE A PARTY/SOCIAL EVENT OFFER
-VISIT THE LIBRARY OFTEN
-DON'T STUDY AT HOME
-TRY TO FORM STUDY GROUPS
-AFTER MEETING SOMEONE, ALWAYS ASK FOR THEIR MOBILE NUMBER
-IF YOU MEET SOMEONE THAT SEEMS NICE, INVITE THE PERSON FOR A DRINK

I can state with almost 99% certainty that whoever shy or not that follows my golden rules will get friends in his/her as early as this first semester.

Now grow some balls and go out there!

Reply 58

littlepotatoe

I was lucky enough to randomly meet two people in the laundry one night, and since then I haven't left their flat. Even moved in with them yesterday as they had a spare room. We're a group of about 15 people, because the flat is a 10 people flat, and there's a 5 people flat next door which is always in our flat! Very good friends, we all get on so well we're just a big happy family :smile:

On the other hand, on my course I haven't met any 'friends' just some people I stay with during lectures, loads of them seem very different to my kind of people, but well, I shall see..!

Reply 59

sr90

Volunteer Team

Original post by BioFurMatPhyStudent

Of course not!
Any Sports or Societies you like? I think they're going to help me a lot! :awesome:

Societies confuse me. I don't have many interests and i want to try new things but... where do i start? :/

Got invited out again last night which was pretty fun. I've bumped into several people today and they're remembering who i am :tongue:

Maybe i'm slowly getting somewhere. I don't know at what point you can consider someone a friend, but as i'm always welcome when i go down to other flats and i keep being invited out people obviously don't hate me do they? I got talking to a guy who is from a fairly dead flat as well and he was saying that he felt he was intruding or being annoying because he spent time with other groups, which is exactly how i feel. I'm sure people don't mind but it felt so reassuring to know i'm not the only one feeling like that!

Would love to meet other people from my course tho. I've been out a bit with a guy on my floor who is also doing History but thats about it. Everyone i've spoken to seems lovely though. I have a busy timetable tommorow so i may just have to take a chance and see what happens.