Girls or boys? Who pays?
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It's obvious that 'Top Queen' is a troll. Everything from name to post content makes it wonderfully obvious. Having said that, I think troll threads often create some excellent discussion, as this one has.
It's not really surprising that lots of people have agreed with the idea of men paying. It's an unconscious rule of society, like women doing all the housework.
But, like the idea of women doing the housework, anyone who has actually thought about it rationally finds it quite absurd, unless their idea of rationality is very much on the old traditional lines of the man working, and the woman raising the kids like a home servant. Which is fine if that's what you like. But as far as I can see, it's very much a polarising opinion; you can believe in men paying and thus believe in male domination over women, or you can favour some kind of shared 'burden' and give both genders equal respect.
On a student forum, one would expect the women to have some personal aspirations beyond flopping around uselessly in relationships, raising kids if you make it that far, and being a good little wife if someone will marry you. Do you not agree with equal pay for men and women? Are you not educating yourself in order to obtain a good job?
It's not really surprising that lots of people have agreed with the idea of men paying. It's an unconscious rule of society, like women doing all the housework.
But, like the idea of women doing the housework, anyone who has actually thought about it rationally finds it quite absurd, unless their idea of rationality is very much on the old traditional lines of the man working, and the woman raising the kids like a home servant. Which is fine if that's what you like. But as far as I can see, it's very much a polarising opinion; you can believe in men paying and thus believe in male domination over women, or you can favour some kind of shared 'burden' and give both genders equal respect.
On a student forum, one would expect the women to have some personal aspirations beyond flopping around uselessly in relationships, raising kids if you make it that far, and being a good little wife if someone will marry you. Do you not agree with equal pay for men and women? Are you not educating yourself in order to obtain a good job?
(edited 10 years ago)
Original post by clh_hilary
If someone not paying for you feels 'cheap', you would be the cheapest for not paying for even yourself.
I would offer either way, as I wrote, but I also believe in guys being gentlemen and insisting on the first date. And yes, I feel it being really cheap when a guy has an interest, asks the girl out and expect her to pay (first dates, hang-outs).
Original post by CodeQ
I would offer either way, as I wrote, but I also believe in guys being gentlemen and insisting on the first date. And yes, I feel it being really cheap when a guy has an interest, asks the girl out and expect her to pay (first dates, hang-outs).
It's cheaper for the person to think s/he's entitled to it.
10/10 OP, perfect troll. The majority of posters haven't even noticed it yet.
(edited 10 years ago)
Original post by clh_hilary
It's cheaper for the person to think s/he's entitled to it.
Where in my post did I write that I felt entitled to it?
Original post by CodeQ
Where in my post did I write that I felt entitled to it?
You wouldn't judge the other guy so badly if you don't feel that way.
Original post by clh_hilary
You wouldn't judge the other guy so badly if you don't feel that way.
I'm judging because I find it cheap to ask somebody out when you're the one with an interest, and expect the other person to pay. Don't get me wrong though, if a girl asks a boy out I think she should feel obligated to pay on the first date as well.
Original post by CodeQ
I've been raised in Sweden and we don't have a dating culture in that sense either, so I get what you're saying. Although, the first "hang-out" is pretty much the same thing really. I just mean especially if the guy asks the girl out for dinner, coffee, etc, he should be the one paying.
I suppose if he asks, I mean if only to save the awkwardness of splitting the bill. I guess what people are annoyed at is the suggestion that it has to always be the guy. In your scenario if you asked a guy for a coffee would you pay or would he still have to pay?
Original post by PeaceTreaty
10/10 OP, perfect troll. The majority of posters haven't even noticed it yet.
I thought OP was a troll too but 'she' also posts in A level discussion forums so its hard to judge.
Original post by clh_hilary
Quite appropriately.
Princesses tend to be people who are ignorant and useless.
Princesses tend to be people who are ignorant and useless.
I disagree, princesses hold a lot of power and responsibility.
Original post by Top Queen
I disagree, princesses hold a lot of power and responsibility.
None of them do. Not those in tales, not those in real life.
Original post by JusticeSeeker
Gold digger?
Not really. I just can't date certain types of people.
Original post by clh_hilary
None of them do. Not those in tales, not those in real life.
They all do, they all have responsibilities, I think the word princess doesn't mean someone is lazy or spoilt etc. I look up to a lot of real princesses.
Original post by Top Queen
They all do, they all have responsibilities, I think the word princess doesn't mean someone is lazy or spoilt etc. I look up to a lot of real princesses.
Honorary titles for which they don't need to do anything more than showing up, breathing, or walking. Yes, lots of responsibilities to you because you are lazy and spoilt.
Original post by Dnator
I suppose if he asks, I mean if only to save the awkwardness of splitting the bill. I guess what people are annoyed at is the suggestion that it has to always be the guy. In your scenario if you asked a guy for a coffee would you pay or would he still have to pay?
I would pay of course. If he insists, I would really like it though.
Original post by CodeQ
I would pay of course. If he insists, I would really like it though.
I guess girls are easier to please than I gave them credit for!
This societal expectation was due to men always having money, and women not due to men working and women staying at home until marriage, then having kids.
Now that women are equal in terms of the workplace, the model makes no sense and hasn't done since the 1960's.
Many women however want it both ways, they want the good traditional aspects of being a woman, but don't want to sit at home making babies... tough luck tbh. I always pay half, nothing more , nothing less.
Now that women are equal in terms of the workplace, the model makes no sense and hasn't done since the 1960's.
Many women however want it both ways, they want the good traditional aspects of being a woman, but don't want to sit at home making babies... tough luck tbh. I always pay half, nothing more , nothing less.
Original post by Top Queen
I disagree, princesses hold a lot of power and responsibility.
You're still nothing unless you roll with the king
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