Is it ever a good idea to contact an ex?

No I didn't really. We went travelling separately, day I came back, said she wasn't in love with me. That was after 2 and abit years. It's been a few months now with no contact.

Posted from TSR Mobile

(edited 8 years ago)

Reply 44

OP

Original post by GingerJoe

No I didn't really. We went travelling separately, day I came back, said she wasn't in love with me. That was after 2 and abit years. It's been a few months now with no contact.

Posted from TSR Mobile

Oh OK so she did kind of give you some closure then. That sucks, well if you do make contact let me know how it goes.

(edited 8 years ago)

Reply 45

Well I don't know I certainly don't feel like I have, I don't completely understand. Up to a few weeks before we we were planing on travelling together and living closer to each other, then bam this...

Reply 46

OP

Original post by GingerJoe

Well I don't know I certainly don't feel like I have, I don't completely understand. Up to a few weeks before we we were planing on travelling together and living closer to each other, then bam this...

OK that's understandable then. I would have a few questions to ask for sure. Good luck!

Reply 47

Well I don't know if I should ask or not.

Reply 48

OP

Original post by GingerJoe

Well I don't know if I should ask or not.

Its up to you

Reply 49

Haha thanks :tongue:

Posted from TSR Mobile

Reply 50

OP

Ok so I just texted him earlier and he gave me his new number, said he's going to be changing it soon. So I guess he wants to keep in touch!

Reply 51

deedee123

16

Original post by phunky_fresh

I'm going to stop fronting and say I didn't text him because I want to be friends with him. I texted him because I miss him alot, I wanted to see how he was doing etc..I'd love to patch things up and I don't feel like its a crazy idea. I'm not going to get my hopes up at this point mind you.

generally speaking this isn't a good idea- you're just prolonging the pain of breaking up. I was in this position where i'd speak to my ex sometimes and it just ruined all the progress i'd made in getting over him, but it is really tempting to chat to them and tell yourself that it's innocent because it's exactly like feeding an addiction.

you never know though, maybe he wants to get back together too, im just talking about my personal experience. Its best to try find out where you stand with him.

Reply 52

OP

Original post by deedee123

generally speaking this isn't a good idea- you're just prolonging the pain of breaking up. I was in this position where i'd speak to my ex sometimes and it just ruined all the progress i'd made in getting over him, but it is really tempting to chat to them and tell yourself that it's innocent because it's exactly like feeding an addiction.

you never know though, maybe he wants to get back together too, im just talking about my personal experience. Its best to try find out where you stand with him.

I know what you mean. It just didn't feel like the end tbh even when he made contact a week later it didn't seem like it was over. Its hard to explain :/ I was reading through old messages from my first ever boyfriend and almost a year after the break up we were still in contact. It definitely didn't help me in the long run, but you live and you learn.

This time around it feels different, my first boyfriend cheated on me and he really wanted to remain friends. My previous boyfriend (the guy my op is referring to) and I broke up because he thought we were on different pages. He wanted a serious relationship (so did I) however I let my past experiences get in the way and struggled so hard to let my guard down. I knew deep down he was a good guy, but everytime things progressed I'd run. I know this is something that will continously be an issue if I don't nip it in the bud and I'm working on it.

I will see how it goes and not keep my hopes up on the meantime. Thank you

Reply 53

thecatwithnohat

20

It's depends on the reason we've broken up

but mainly, no

Reply 54

OP

Original post by thecatwithnohat

It's depends on the reason we've broken up

but mainly, no

That's fair enough. We broke up because he thought we were on different pages. He wanted a serious relationship (so did I) however I let my past experiences get in the way and struggled so hard to let my guard down. I knew deep down he was a good guy, but everytime things progressed I'd run. I know this is something that will continously be an issue if I don't nip it in the bud and I'm working on it.

Reply 55

username47781

20

I personally can't be friends with an ex, brings back too many painful memories.

Reply 56

OP

Original post by Rock Fan

I personally can't be friends with an ex, brings back too many painful memories.

I hear you. I tried being friends with my first real boyfriend and it just didn't work at all. The only reason I went ahead with it is because he wanted us to remain friends.

Reply 57

OP