Emotionally abusive parents

So my boyfriend is 19 and has emotionally abusive parents, they constantly put him down and yell at him, swear and insult him, he's pretty sensitive and they know this so they know how badly he is upset by it (Before he met me he used to spend all night crying) They've caused him to have no self confidence, and no self esteem, his father even once tried to punch him hard in the face. He never does anything wrong (Mostly stays in his room, doesn't drink or do drugs or anything else that would give them reasonable cause to be angry)
I would appreciate advice if there's anything we can do to stop them verbally abusing him and making him feel worthless
Thanks

Reply 1

Mistletoe

2

Let him move in with you so he can escape them.

Reply 2

elihowitz

OP

3

Unfortunately until September we can't do that, we're in a long distance relationship, in September I'll be going to University and he'll be moving to live with me. (I live with my parents at the moment and they wouldn't be comfortable with that) Basically I was just wondering if there's anyway he could get any help and make it stop before he can move out

Reply 3

Moonstruck16

5

They probably won't stop until he's moved out. My dad brought me up and was very emotionally manipulative whilst I was growing up but that all stopped when I moved out to go to university. I think at that point he realised that in this situation, he can't win anymore.

He could talk to them but it sounds like that may do more harm than good. Just tell him to talk to someone else to keep him getting through it all.

Reply 4

Anonymous #1

He needs to stand up to his parents, my dad was never physically abusive but he do things to make me feel bad like wait to come home till I've gone bed, if he knew I wasn't in he'd come home early, sometimes he'd sit in another room or just go up to bed without saying anything… it's quite hurtful. And when I did see him he'd just complain about stuff and life, stuff no kid needs to Hear about but anyway, I started doing the same. I would come home late or just run up to bed before he came home and turn everything off, when he makes his rude remarks I would say something even worse back and just walk off (you never want a full argument, let the anger build up) then I'd leave him and go to my mums… I felt bad becuase it was like mental torture but that's he did to me for years and doing this made him realise just how bad his behaviour was, we spoke about it and he explained stuff (it was fair reasons, he didn't hate me or anything) so now things are better. He doesn't make rude comments, he just comes home whenever but doesn't complain and cracks a joke instead… healthy? Probably not. Effective? Sure!

Reply 5

elihowitz

OP

3

Original post by Moonstruck16

They probably won't stop until he's moved out. My dad brought me up and was very emotionally manipulative whilst I was growing up but that all stopped when I moved out to go to university. I think at that point he realised that in this situation, he can't win anymore.

He could talk to them but it sounds like that may do more harm than good. Just tell him to talk to someone else to keep him getting through it all.

Thank you, do you know of any numbers that people usually call in this situation, like can you call the police or are there special numbers that deal with this? All the abuse numbers seem to be just for women who are abused by partners.

Reply 6

LisaNikita

2

"I've been mentally, physically, emotionally and SEXUALLY abused... Send nudes"

Reply 7

Moonstruck16

5

Original post by elihowitz

Thank you, do you know of any numbers that people usually call in this situation, like can you call the police or are there special numbers that deal with this? All the abuse numbers seem to be just for women who are abused by partners.

I don't think the police will take it seriously is he hasn't been physically abused. A quick look on google came up with a few numbers he could try that are for male victims of abuse, but I don't really know much about the charities. My suggestion would be for him to call Nightline or the Samaritans.

Reply 8

Analyst89

20

The Samaritans: 116 123.

If he's dad physically hits him in anyway, tell him to call the Police on 999 immediately.

Reply 9

username2704229

3

Original post by elihowitz

So my boyfriend is 19 and has emotionally abusive parents, they constantly put him down and yell at him, swear and insult him, he's pretty sensitive and they know this so they know how badly he is upset by it (Before he met me he used to spend all night crying) They've caused him to have no self confidence, and no self esteem, his father even once tried to punch him hard in the face. He never does anything wrong (Mostly stays in his room, doesn't drink or do drugs or anything else that would give them reasonable cause to be angry)
I would appreciate advice if there's anything we can do to stop them verbally abusing him and making him feel worthless
Thanks

I cannot imagine how girls can date weak men! tell him to grow up! 19 years old is too old to cry over parents being 'emotionally abusive' especially for a male! pussies are getting girls, and here I am single haha

Reply 10

elihowitz

OP

3

Original post by DNA89

I cannot imagine how girls can date weak men! tell him to grow up! 19 years old is too old to cry over parents being 'emotionally abusive' especially for a male! pussies are getting girls, and here I am single haha

Yeaah sounds like there might be a reason why you're single

Reply 11

edenlny

9

Original post by DNA89

I cannot imagine how girls can date weak men! tell him to grow up! 19 years old is too old to cry over parents being 'emotionally abusive' especially for a male! pussies are getting girls, and here I am single haha

"19 years old is too old to cry over parents being 'emotionally abusive' especially for a male"
what ????? you really need to stop embarrassing urself on here

(edited 7 years ago)

Reply 12

username2957542

13

Original post by elihowitz

So my boyfriend is 19 and has emotionally abusive parents, they constantly put him down and yell at him, swear and insult him, he's pretty sensitive and they know this so they know how badly he is upset by it (Before he met me he used to spend all night crying) They've caused him to have no self confidence, and no self esteem, his father even once tried to punch him hard in the face. He never does anything wrong (Mostly stays in his room, doesn't drink or do drugs or anything else that would give them reasonable cause to be angry)
I would appreciate advice if there's anything we can do to stop them verbally abusing him and making him feel worthless
Thanks

Im the same but im not a guy , but I drink sometimes, like rarely not alot tho. and also my parents are abusive but the rest of the family r.

Reply 13

username2957542

13

Original post by elihowitz

So my boyfriend is 19 and has emotionally abusive parents, they constantly put him down and yell at him, swear and insult him, he's pretty sensitive and they know this so they know how badly he is upset by it (Before he met me he used to spend all night crying) They've caused him to have no self confidence, and no self esteem, his father even once tried to punch him hard in the face. He never does anything wrong (Mostly stays in his room, doesn't drink or do drugs or anything else that would give them reasonable cause to be angry)
I would appreciate advice if there's anything we can do to stop them verbally abusing him and making him feel worthless
Thanks

Im the same but im not a guy , but I drink sometimes, like rarely not alot tho. and also my parents are not abusive but the rest of the family r.

Reply 14

Anonymous #2

Do they physically abuse him in front of you? If they do then record it and show the vid to the police. Or tell him to set up his camera and record it

no idea why he chooses to put up with this

Emotionally abusive parents

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