Pakistani mum makes me do all the housework

I'm 18 and got two brothers who are older than me and my mum abuses me for not doing the chores and always being on my phone whilst my brothers don't get told off for even putting their plate back in the kitchen!! If I left my plate on the table and went upstairs, my mum would say I'm stupid and brainless. My brothers are on their phones 24/7 not helping out coz they don't get told to help out. Mother always controls my life, deciding what I should wear, I get told off for not wearing a top that's long enough to cover my backside. I once went to an all-girls function and I didn't want to wear my hijab and my mum was so shocked, saying "oh you don't want to wear your hijab anymore!!" and me wanting to take off my hijab was only for one day....its really annoying because there's so much worse sh*t going on in the world but my mum cares about what I wear so much! She thinks if I take off my hijab for one day, I'll get out of control. I'm also constantly compared to my cousins! Anyone else have similar experiences?!! If yes, how do you deal with such parents!

Just do as you mother says, eventhough her method can be “mad”, she wants the best of you in terms of practicing faith. If you are going to wear a headscarf, wear one for God.

As for the house chores, some people are given a challenge with parents that may not understand how to make things fair. Though think of it as an honour that your mother is asking you of all people to help her. Think of the reward God may give you

My mum is the only practicing person in the house, she prays and everything but doesnt encourage me to pray. She likes to impose culture more than religion.

The reason why your mom treats you like this is because this is what she has been thought as a kid , but obviously these thoughts are an old fashioned close minded way of thinkning .

Try to talk to your mom in a calm manner and use reason with her , dont get frustrated with her when she tells u to do chores , talk to her in a calm polite manner and try to make her understand about things like feminism , use reason

And as for your clothing , wear whatever u feel more comfortable in , tell your mom that u will wear more modest clothing as you grow up , give it time , enjoy your youth

She wouldn't listen to me coz she knows she needs to prepare me for marriage, where I would have to listen to my mother in law and If I don't cook or clean, no one would want to get married to me. Idm cleaning up, I hate mess. But when everyday, my brothers or dad cant even do simple things like putting their plates back in the kitchen or hanging their coats on the door, it really bothers me.

Pakistani’s traditions. Just wait till your married in few months or something

She wouldn't listen to me coz she knows she needs to prepare me for marriage, where I would have to listen to my mother in law and If I don't cook or clean, no one would want to get married to me. Idm cleaning up, I hate mess. But when everyday, my brothers or dad cant even do simple things like putting their plates back in the kitchen or hanging their coats on the door, it really bothers me.

At the end of the day its your life and you can live it the way u choose to or you can spend it trying to make everyone else happy .
And if the only reason u are wearing your hijab is bc u are scared of your mother then theres no point bc even god doesnt consider your hijab as a good deed anymore
wear it for the right reasons or dont .

Remember:

Hijab is a concept of dressing modestly, it doesn’t just mean covering your hair.

There is no point wearing a headscarf and then wearing tight jeans and a crop top underneath!

Don't plan to get married anytime soon and especially to a Pakistani man. Parents treat their sons like they're better than girls and are always taught that their wives will do everything for them. My older bro whos 22 cant even turn on the washing machine. Every family is different, but the majority of P*ki families do treat their sons more favorably.

Its not a crop top lmaoo its a normal shirt that just doesn't cover the shape of my bum

How many proposals have you had till now?

Also, I was the only girl to wear Hijab in the all-girls function! My mum emotionally blackmails me by saying I look better in the hijab...that the organizers of the party haven't seen me without my hijab so I should wear it! I absolutely hate wearing it now, but dont want to take it off coz of fear.

I'm only 18....