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Girls, would you EVER date a foreign man?

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Yup, they were absolutely vile!
Haha, funnily enough, it's the same people who I was on about in that thread who were saying it! Hence why I really don't like them.

Ah ok i see :biggrin:

I thought that thread was a bit harsh :s-smilie:

But wow I thought chavs were only really after terrorising ethnic minorities :s-smilie:

Reply 121

.Ali.

Original post by asdfg0987

what part of britain are you from?

South staffs, I live in a really nice little country town, but my school had some chavs in it. Not loads, but there were about 10 or 15 of them and they were really nasty to pretty much everyone. They didn't like me anyway lol, and then they just constantly harrassed me about 'dating outside my race'. :s-smilie:

(I didn't even see it like that, he was just a person, the same as everyone else, but yeah :s-smilie:

)

Reply 122

.Ali.

Original post by amsie/

Ah ok i see :biggrin:

I thought that thread was a bit harsh :s-smilie:

But wow I thought chavs were only really after terrorising ethnic minorities :s-smilie:

Yeah I tend to be ever-so-slightly anti-chav after that! They've done other stuff too, there were only about 10 of them but they were horrid! They kept insulting my best friend simply because he was friends with 'the traitor slag' (me :rolleyes:

). Yeah they terrorise pretty much everyone who isn't one unfortunately. :frown:

Reply 123

No Future

Yes I would date a foreign man

Reply 124

amsie/

Original post by .Ali.

). Yeah they terrorise pretty much everyone who isn't one unfortunately. :frown:

You must live in a really racist area- i live in leicester where there's a pretty equal number of white & black people :biggrin:

. I'm neither, but my area's pretty tolerant considering we're the only black family in the area :wink:

Reply 125

Iorek

Original post by .Ali.

). Yeah they terrorise pretty much everyone who isn't one unfortunately. :frown:

Britain could do with more anti-chavs :smile:

Keep up the good work :biggrin:

In before Mr Smurf.

Yes, of course I would. I'm not white or English anyway, so it might be a bit hypocritical of me if I didn't.

Reply 128

BellaBoo

Original post by effofex

Cool. This is all very interesting and eye-opening and I have some more questions :smile:

I still don't fully understand why people would think the white female in question would appear desperate - I'd have thought the Asian/African male would look far more desperate given that he may be after a UK passport. The reason is that you can apply for British citizenship after 5 years permanent law-abiding residence so having to resort to dating a British woman may make it appear as though he is impatient or that he might have misdemeanours to hide from the Immigration & Nationality Directorate.

Lol - the term 'Freshie' is used in London too. I'm aware there is some resentment from British-born people with ancestry from the nations from which the aforementioned 'Freshies' have migrated from - maybe this stems from competition in employment etc. - I'm not sure really. What sleazy and culturally backward things are they held responsible for? And when you mentioned that they do unacceptable things - are these activities illegal? - since if they are (like molestation of men/women) then aren't they liable to termination of their residence permit, being issued with a criminal record and possible deportation?

How come they are seen as losers? Are they viewed as quite slovenly, unsuccessful and uninteresting? Could they be ridiculed for example, for eating rice or pizza with their hands, rather than with a knife/fork? Another query I had was regarding 'cultural ignorance' - if Birmingham is quite a multiethnic city, presumably non-Freshies are quite likely to have Freshies as friends/work colleagues/acquaintances etc. so they might know them fairly well? Obviously this might differ in a rural area. Actually when looking up 'Interracial marriage in the United Kingdom' on Wikipedia I found this quote:

'By World War II, any form of intimate relationship between a white woman and non-white man was often considered offensive.[140] Concerns were repeatedly voiced regarding white adolescent girls forming relationships with coloured men, including South Asian seamen in the 1920s,[141] Muslim immigrants in the 1920s to 1940s,[142] African American GIs during World War II, Maltese and Cypriot cafe owners in the 1940s to 1950s, Caribbean immigrants in the 1950s to 1960s, and South Asian immigrants in the 1960s.'

....so maybe in many cases today could it be considered very culturally insensitive for a coloured male to date a British woman?

I'm not sure if my experience is representative, but I tend to meet most of my fellow Freshies in a professional and very male-dominated context (finance) so I'm not aware if they have ever attempted to date a British woman. Obviously if they or I did so at work it would be highly inappropriate in a workplace environment. Alot of these men are on intra-company transfers and temporary work permits of 2-3 years in duration and some may even have partners in their homelands so there is no incentive to flirt with a woman regardless of whether they are British or not. Alot of the activities many Asian/African migrants are often interested in (cricket, football, billiards etc.) may be quite unpopular with British women so might it be the case that they don't interact outside a workplace environment?

Yes i find it interesting too :smile:

. I'll try and answer your questions as best as i can :smile:

In terms of the British women appearing desperate, i think it may have something to do with the types of British women who tend to date "Freshies." I have noticed (and i don't mean to sound bitchy/judgemental) that a lot of the British women who go for them, tend to be considered unattractive, which is perhaps why this reputation of desperation comes from-as a lot of people tend to say that the only British women who go for Asian or African born men are those who cannot get a British man. I agree that there is also the element of the man in question appearing desperate for a visa-but as i said before this only serves to make the woman look even more desperate as some would take the piss out of her for either ignoring or not realising that he could only be dating her for a visa (when the woman in case is unattractive, this only confounds people's suspicions that she is being used.) People may also take the mick because Asian and African born men tend to be seen as lower in the social scale than British born people (most likely due to them doing low paid work and also negative stereotypes about their countries of origin being poor etc.)

As far as sleazy and culturally backwards things go-it's mainly stuff like chatting up much younger girls etc. It's not rare (at least in Birmingham) to see Asian born men especially (and age wise i'm talking guys who look like they're in their 30s) to chat up girls who are 14/15. For example, i remember when i was about 14 there was an Asian guy (Pakistani i think rather than Indian) who run the chip shop who used to try and get me and my friend's numbers in exchange for free food/drink. And there was another guy (who i think must have been in at least his 40s) who used to buy my friend alcohol if she flirted with him. Now i'm not say that this type of behaviour doesn't happen amongst British men, because it does (and i'm not saying that in some cases young girls don't encourage it in exchange for money/alcohol/fags etc), but this kind of behaviour does seem to be more common amongst guys born in Asia. It's like they have no concept of age or anything-which is seen as unacceptable in this country.

You're right, Birmingham is a very multi ethic city, but (unlike London) it doesn't have as many economic opportunities for immigrants so whereas it seems in London a lot of guys from India etc work in finance-in Birmingham most of them tend to work in low paid work (e.g. factory work etc) and also tend (from what i've noticed anyway) to work in places owned by Indian people, and with a workforce mainly of fellow Indian born people, so "non Freshies" don't really get a chance to mix with "Freshies" in the same way that maybe you guys in London do. (Obviously there are Indian Doctors etc, but your average Brummie isn't a Doctor lol, so thus don't get to mix with them in a non professional setting.) British born people in Birmingham tend to mix quite well (although there is some segregation between those of different races) but non British born people (and i don't only mean Asians or Africans, but also Eastern Europeans for example) do tend to socialise mainly amongst their own communities so there isn't really the amount of mixing that you would expect in such a multi cultural city. Because of the little interaction between British people (especially White British people) and Indian born people (for example), there does tend to be some ignorance about accents/clothing etc-which is maybe why "Freshies" get such a bad rep.

I wouldn't say that it's as culturally insensitive today for a non White guy to marry/date a White female as it was in the past (for example as it was when my nan married my grandad and her family disowned here lol)-although obviously there is still some ignorance regarding it (i've got a friend whose Dad would disown her if she married a "coloured" man.) I'd say (possibly due to events like 9/11, 7/7) the main "taboo" would be males of a Muslim background (particularly Pakistani) dating a White woman, as although it happens-the girl in question would probably get a lot more negative comments than if she were dating an Indian or Black guy (i knew, for example, a mixed race Black and White girl who fancied a british Pakistani guy but her dad-who was Black-basically told her that she couldn't date him, and i've heard girls get called stuff like "Paki Bashers" if they date a Pakistani guy.)

I think it does all boil down to some sort of cultural ignorance, as well as (sometimes unfounded) negative stereotypes about Asian or African men (i should say, btw, that the reason why i've focussed more on Asian men rather than African men, is that while stereotypes do exist concerning African men, Birmingham has WAY more Asian born men so therefore i know more about them, whereas i've only properly met about 3 or 4 African guys.)

Reply 129

N_Thuduwage

I can talk proper English -.-
And I dress properly thank you very much.

I do

Just a quick question while we are on this topic.

Do you girls who have foreign boyfriends/husbands ever wonder if that foreign guy of yours' would ditch you the moment his time in UK is up and he has a better prospect elsewhere?