How to react when your boyfriend comments on how hot other girls are?

Your boyfriend sounds like an immature boy, to be honest. I know how you feel as a young woman I wouldnt like it if my boyfriend spoke about other women like that, they need to understand it makes you feel unattractive and unhappy. Fortunately my current OH cares enough for my feelings not to do things like that.

You may get many men/boys telling you to just ignore it and hes just being a lad, and I say ignore them. Don't let your boyfriend carry on like this if it makes you unhappy because it will slowly wear your self esteem right down and you dont need that, trust me I've been there myself :smile:

Reply 2

RichyFrench

I'd be annoyed and probably tell him sarcastically to go bang them. I think the best thing to do would be to explain that you don't mind him eyeing other girls occasionally, that you're not gonna have a go at him every time he stares a bit longer at an attractive girl, but that it does get to you when he then tells you about it and says stuff that he never says about you. A lot of girls will have a hissy fit if their guy holds eye contact with a girl for a second too long, so I think he'll see that you are being quite reasonable.

Reply 3

amyshamblesxx

10

Your boyfriend sounds quite tactless, you should tell him you'd prefer it if he kept comments like that to himself.

Reply 4

Ortegas

5

Well, it's true, so what?

Reply 5

parasitic

11

Definatelly speak to him. Tell him how it makes you feel. He should keep these comments to himself.
He is either really stupid that he thinks this is alright, or he is trying to hint something at you- both of which are fairly dumb. Maybe he just wants you to make more of an effort, even if it's not your style but maybe if you got yourself a nice bodycon dress within your own comfort zone and made a big attempt at looking 'hot' yet still yourself. Maybe that's all he wants, not sure. But speaking to him will help you to understand why he is acting this way and if there's no real good reason for it, to shut up and keep it to himself, and of course throw you occasional compliments!

Reply 6

systeric

10

If you don't like something your partner is doing - TELL THEM. Simple as that.

Reply 7

laurentommo

WOAH no way! Tell him this is completely wrong fair enough the odd comment on tv, or a look or something but this is too much.

Reply 8

Original post by Ortegas

Well, it's true, so what?

My huge guess is that you are male.... :eek:

(not)

Reply 9

Original post by Chloe xxx

My huge guess is that you are male.... :eek:

(not)

He's right though (yes I'm male also surprise surprise).

If my gf says some guy is hot do I get upset over it? no.

I always say how hot other girls are e.g. if we're watching a movie etc, it's harmless, not like we're going to act on it.

You'll drive you boyfriend away if you keep being so petty.

Reply 10

JongKey

Original post by TheInformer

He's right though (yes I'm male also surprise surprise).

If my gf says some guy is hot do I get upset over it? no.

I always say how hot other girls are e.g. if we're watching a movie etc, it's harmless, not like we're going to act on it.

You'll drive you boyfriend away if you keep being so petty.

Saying someone's hot and saying "i'd bang em" are two completely different things. No guy should be talking about sexing some other girl up in front of their gf - it's just rude.

Reply 11

Original post by JongKey

Saying someone's hot and saying "i'd bang em" are two completely different things. No guy should be talking about sexing some other girl up in front of their gf - it's just rude.

Yeah I agree her bf sounds like a tool.

I forgot to put that part in.

Reply 12

JongKey

Original post by TheInformer

Yeah I agree her bf sounds like a tool.

I forgot to put that part in.

Ahh no problem. Don't really think there's any issue with saying someone is good looking but her boyfriend just sounds like a right douche, as if he doesn't even acknowledge his own girlfriend.

Reply 13

abc101

17

Your boyfriend sounds like a complete prick.

It's one thing commenting that somebody's good-looking - and if I was a guy, I probably wouldn't comment on that in front of my girlfriend anyway - but there is absolutely no excuse for slowing down to look at girls and saying things like, 'I'd bang them'.

Tell him he's being completely out of order. Or turn the tables and whenever you see a decent-looking guy, say something equally tasteless and disgusting like, 'Ooh, wouldn't mind him giving me a good rogering!' See how he likes that :p:

Reply 14

FuzzySheep

15

Original post by abc101

Your boyfriend sounds like a complete prick.

It's one thing commenting that somebody's good-looking - and if I was a guy, I probably wouldn't comment on that in front of my girlfriend anyway - but there is absolutely no excuse for slowing down to look at girls and saying things like, 'I'd bang them'.

Tell him he's being completely out of order. Or turn the tables and whenever you see a decent-looking guy, say something equally tasteless and disgusting like, 'Ooh, wouldn't mind him giving me a good rogering!' See how he likes that :p:

That's brilliant, do this OP.

Reply 15

Original post by TheInformer

He's right though (yes I'm male also surprise surprise).

If my gf says some guy is hot do I get upset over it? no.

I always say how hot other girls are e.g. if we're watching a movie etc, it's harmless, not like we're going to act on it.

You'll drive you boyfriend away if you keep being so petty.

Other peoples relationships are different, what might be acceptable to you wouldnt be to anothers boyfriend and vice versa.

The majority of girls DO NOT like their boyfriends commenting on the hotness of other girls. It makes them feel unattractive and unappreciated.

Why is this basic aspect of common sense beyond some males?

Reply 16

Original post by Chloe xxx

Why is this basic aspect of common sense beyond some males?

Because it is not an issue AT ALL unless the girl/guy has low self-esteem.

Does it make you feel less "hot"? when someone says it? Your bf is with you for a reason, just because he says he finds other girls attractive shouldn't be a problem.

You shouldn't have to change or worry about what you are going to say when you are in a relationship.

Reply 17

Many girls enter relationships with perfectly in-tact self esteem and confidence, and that is sometimes ruined by such behaviour the OP is talking about throughout the course of the relationship. Like I said, other people are different and find different things in a relationship acceptable/unacceptable. Many women will see the constant sexualized commenting on other womens looks as a sign they arnt attractive enough to keep their partners attention on them, or that their partner cares that little for their feelings they tell their partner how much they want to sh*g someone else on a regular basis.

Constantly commenting on womens looks is something school boys do, its immature and is definately not an attractive trait in a potential partner.

Good for you if you have a relationship free of these kind of problems, though its quite ignorant of you to proclaim your personal predictment as concrete and that everyone else should conform to your ideals.

Men finding women hot is natural. Women feeling insecure of their partners apparent affections for other women is also natural.

Theres nothing wrong with thinking someone else is hot whilst your in a relationship. However what mindset does a person have who is constantly reminding their OH how gorgeous they find other people? Shouldnt they be concentrating on their partner?

(edited 12 years ago)

Reply 18

Original post by Chloe xxx

ok

I presume you're replying to my post.

You make valid points, I know saying "I'd do her" or whatever caveman lingo her boyfriend uses isn't right, as I said in a previous post.

I was just pointing out that in an ideal relationship saying someone is hot shouldn't matter one-iota. When my gf says it I will agree or disagree, i.e. she says brad pitt looks good in troy, I'd agree (no homo).

Obviously most people who do so, myself included don't say it every second of the day and again saying it occasionally shouldn't be an issue. If my gf straight up told me she didn't like it then I'd respect that.

Reply 19