What would you consider cheating in a relationship?
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In a relationship, cheating is when one person cheates during a competitive (for example sporting) event while competing against their partner (eg if they're playing a game of chess or monopoly or something). It's also considered cheating if someone cheates during an exam when their partner is the invigilator. Everything else is fine and acceptable. Except when you get married, then you're only allowed to have sex with one person.
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Original post by BunnyMisery246
Me and my man were having a heated discussion today about what is and isn't acceptable in a relationship. Basically I think cheating is sexual contact from kissing to sex, and emotional bonding/confidence that interferes with or replaces our emotional bonding as cheating. Also dancing/grinding on others is cheating, but he doesn't think so. Whats your view on what's considered cheating in a relationship?
Exactly the same.
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From a psychological perspective, it is in my opinion human nature for individual's to have needs of increasing self-esteem. Therefore, although I consider any sexual physical contact and directly seeking self-sexually gratifying behaviour (examples; directly messaging a person with a sexual focus/intention or seeking sexual attention through ones own behaviour) to be cheating, I do not agree that responding to flirtatious behaviour with a response that does not escalte to heightened sexual attraction as wrong. If another individual is to pay you sexual attention, therefore theoretically providing an increase to self-esteem (in my opinion a basic human need), I do not agree that this should be rejected or ignored. It could be considered a problem if one is not receiving similar satisfaction from ones relationship, but that is another story all-together. As is it fundamentally within the human nature of males to attempt to hunt a mate (for purposes of reproduction and our species continued existence) and for females to attempt to attract/lure a mate, I do not initially see a problem with this interaction.
In straight forward english, my example of what I find acceptable would be a woman looking at me in a club or offering myself a complement and myself accepting it or in reaction to her interest taking glance at the woman.
I however understand that these actions may be hard to judge and therefore people have differing opinions on this matter.
In straight forward english, my example of what I find acceptable would be a woman looking at me in a club or offering myself a complement and myself accepting it or in reaction to her interest taking glance at the woman.
I however understand that these actions may be hard to judge and therefore people have differing opinions on this matter.
(edited 9 years ago)
Original post by auntumn89
Texting arrangements blow jobs kissing all cheating if you were happy you wouldn't need to look elsewhere
If u believe in a mans monogamous love your in denial, desire to pass on genes exists in men
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Original post by BunnyMisery246
He thinks it's fine if another girl is grinding on him in a nightclub and flirting with the opposite sex isn't cheating either, but anything else he would consider cheating the same as me. Personally I think all of that is cheating, but that's just my view.
Do you grind on him ? Cos if you don't it makes sense what he's saying
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Original post by ubi1
If u believe in a mans monogamous love your in denial, desire to pass on genes exists in men
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I'm insulted.
And you are just somebody who believes in misandry and probably thinks sexism against girls is the only kind.
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To me anything more than a prolonged hug counts in my book as cheating! The lack of dedication and commitment in relationships in this day and age is quite frankly barbaric and I cannot fathom why people stray so much from their lovers! It is baffling! 
Cheating in a relationship is vile and disgraceful.
Original post by TransMan
I only cheat if I'm dating a ugly fat munter.
What a fine course of action dear. Those munters need to be put in their place.
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Some good opinions here, glad most are with me. It seems we're living in an age where theres a lot less respect in relationships and more cheating. The worst thing is it's becoming more and more acceptable. Heres to us who still believe in love and respect. Monogamy never hurt anyone just ask your grandparents, bet most of them have been married for decades and never done any of the crap these couples do these days, and we wonder why so many relationships end or why the divorce rates are so high. Aaaaand breathe. Rant over! 
I think it all depends. It might not be even cheating but if your partner makes you upset constantly, that is not right. The best way is to talk and be honest. However, it does not always work.
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Original post by BunnyMisery246
Me and my man were having a heated discussion today about what is and isn't acceptable in a relationship. Basically I think cheating is sexual contact from kissing to sex, and emotional bonding/confidence that interferes with or replaces our emotional bonding as cheating. Also dancing/grinding on others is cheating, but he doesn't think so. Whats your view on what's considered cheating in a relationship?
Come on bunny dancing isn't cheating. Sexual intercourse is. Plain and simple.
I don't think that kissing is cheating but I'd be pretty pissed off if my S.O. kissed someone else. Also if he did internet sex with other people like for example interactive cam or have sexy chats with people. 
For me cheating would probably go from... genital touchings
I don't want to say that I will NEVER cheat. After all, if my husband is going to be old and rich there is a slight chance that's he's going to be repulsive too
For me cheating would probably go from... genital touchings
I don't want to say that I will NEVER cheat. After all, if my husband is going to be old and rich there is a slight chance that's he's going to be repulsive too
Original post by auntumn89
What does he consider cheating actual sex, I'd kiss his friend and say ahhh it's not cheating we didn't have sex (I wouldn't but most girls would in that situation)
Have you had a few beers?
Anything from sexting to sexual contact, e.g kissing or sex itself.
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Anything from sexting onwards. I could forgive a drunken kiss (unless it was something that happened every time he went out or something), but anything more? Game over.
(edited 9 years ago)
Original post by BunnyMisery246
Me and my man were having a heated discussion today about what is and isn't acceptable in a relationship. Basically I think cheating is sexual contact from kissing to sex, and emotional bonding/confidence that interferes with or replaces our emotional bonding as cheating. Also dancing/grinding on others is cheating, but he doesn't think so. Whats your view on what's considered cheating in a relationship?
I wouldn't consider dancing/grinding to be cheating as such, but that doesn't mean I wouldn't be pissed off if my girlfriend was grinding with other guys in clubs. In the same way, ignoring me to talk to other guys while I'm there wouldn't be cheating in my eyes, but it's a really ****ty way to treat someone you're in a relationship with.
The 'cheating' term isn't particularly helpful when it's not just cheating that you're concerned about. The relevant issue is respect - if he respects you, he won't grind on other girls in clubs, whether it's cheating or not.
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