Abusive Mother

I wish I could give u a hug u need it. I think you should tell someone this is horrible I cant believe ur experiencing so much abuse like this its horrible and disturbing. u need to tell someone it isn't shameful pls do this for yourself u deserve to live happily. I wish I could help you more. this isn't right ur mother should not do this to you its inhumane. pray for yourself there is a way to get out of this

I can't fully comprehend the magnitude of the situation but,
ask yourself if you would rather die trying to escape from this nightmare OR accept it, and let your mother do what she wants to you. In my opinion (and I think many others would think), you haven't lost as long as you keep perservering.
Good luck and prayers to you.

ill come collect you pm me i swear down you dont deserve to suffer like this

Use a friend at uni's phone. Or use a university phone. Or a public call box if you can find any near where you live or study.

And leaving home really is as easy as we've been saying. All it takes is for you to decide to go ahead with it. It only takes 1 second to make a decision. We are all hoping that things turn out for the best for you and that you come to no more lasting harm.

We're rooting for you. We are on your side. But there's nothing we can do to help you apart from writing words on a forum.
You have to help yourself. Help yourself by getting professional help and advice on this. There are a number of different organisations that will provide this ranging from your univeristy tutors and helpline, to the Samaritans, to your GP to the police to the Citizens Advice Bureau to Social Services etc etc etc.

I feel so scared and worried for you now
You have no idea

Please update I need to know if you are safe

oh and please don't let your mum see this thread by accident

Also I am worried for your siblings as well
God knows what she will do to them when you escape
If you do escape please keep in contact with your siblings. They may need you.

Stay safe
Ps - Feel free to pm me anytime

Do you know any friends at uni that have a place of their own?

Did you get to break your fast tonight?

You have a choice, Put up with this bs your whole life or be "shamed". Ik i dont know all the ins and outs of your situation but if i was in your position and my family treated me like that, I would run away. And elaborate on your fears of getting killed because that is a bit more serious that just a family issue.

Omg girl honestly same i could not relate more my mum does that to me but my dad doesn't see it because he's mostly at work....and when i tell him he doesn't believe me because in front of my dad my mum acts all nice and kind
I have my phone though. I'm just a weakling who is too embarrassed to ask for help. And i don't want to be separated from my dad whose done nothing.
I'd advice you not to be like me.... But i know how hard it is to act on it when you've been like this for so long

Does your mum let you go to uni?

Hey! Just read your post and honestly I feel you!
I wouldn't say that my mom "Abuses" me, but she does act in a way where I feel that I can't express myself when she get angry at me. (Daily yelling rituals- because obviously I have to have done something wrong.) I feel that it's so unfair because I fast and I have my exams coming up in a week so it's unnecessary stress.
I recomend you to talk to someone understanding in your family (Cousin/ Aunt) membey they can act as an mediator between you and your mother. Also find yourself some outlet (Art/ Drawing) any type of activity for you to escape in a productive manner.

Good Luck, and I dont know you, but you can go through this. You are strong, you are worth it. And as crazy as it might sound deep deep deep deeep deeeep down somewhere, she truly loves you.
And if she acts the way she does, it's not you, it's her probably dealing with somehting.

If I run away or seek help or anything like that, its almost akin to leaving my religion or something like that. I know it sounds exaggerated, but when I do do that I won't ever be able to fit back into the community. I will be excluded, ill never marry or have kids, or have a normal muslim life. it might seem absurd to most of you, but its so much harder for us muslims to talk and speak up about things like this. its not just the consequences it will have on me. yes I might not be able to live a normal life like the rest of them, but it also ruins all future prospects for my younger siblings. its just so many things that will go downhill. yes I might get to fix my life, but ill be ruining my familys in the process. she's a bad mother to me, not as bad to them. by speaking up ill be taking away their mother, ill be ripping my family apart, ill be the demon child she says I am

If I run away or seek help or anything like that, its almost akin to leaving my religion or something like that. I know it sounds exaggerated, but when I do do that I won't ever be able to fit back into the community. I will be excluded, ill never marry or have kids, or have a normal muslim life. it might seem absurd to most of you, but its so much harder for us muslims to talk and speak up about things like this. its not just the consequences it will have on me. yes I might not be able to live a normal life like the rest of them, but it also ruins all future prospects for my younger siblings. its just so many things that will go downhill. yes I might get to fix my life, but ill be ruining my familys in the process. she's a bad mother to me, not as bad to them. by speaking up ill be taking away their mother, ill be ripping my family apart, ill be the demon child she says I am

its just its so much complex than that. speaking out would mean I would be completly alienated from all my family and this whole community. as ****ed up as this community is I just don't know where I would go and fit in. and I feel like id be on the run my whole life. like where will I go?

I honestly don't know what more to say. I come from a background where honour killings are something completely normal?

If I run away or seek help or anything like that, its almost akin to leaving my religion or something like that. I know it sounds exaggerated, but when I do do that I won't ever be able to fit back into the community. I will be excluded, ill never marry or have kids, or have a normal muslim life. it might seem absurd to most of you, but its so much harder for us muslims to talk and speak up about things like this. its not just the consequences it will have on me. yes I might not be able to live a normal life like the rest of them, but it also ruins all future prospects for my younger siblings. its just so many things that will go downhill. yes I might get to fix my life, but ill be ruining my familys in the process. she's a bad mother to me, not as bad to them. by speaking up ill be taking away their mother, ill be ripping my family apart, ill be the demon child she says I am

I know you said many posts like this, but I'll respond to this one. Yes, there is a high chance that you will be alienated from your community... But would be safe, secure, and happy - and you would not be suffering and in danger every day. You can marry, and have kids, and continue with Islam (this isn't against Islam) - you can actually breathe a new life into your heart, in a new place when you are free from this suffering.

Because right now, you aren't living a life.

Afterwards, the police can try to rescue your siblings too. I know your mother may treat them better and they may show hate to you for doing so, but they are suffering too if they are living in this sick environment witnessing child abuse every day. If they have hatred it will wear off and one day they will realise. If your cousins and wider family put honour above literal child abuse, then I know it is hard to see but they are certainly not worth it. Once rescued, if you do worry that they are a threat to your life then tell the police and they can try to set you up a new, safe life. It will be fine, it won't be easy, but it will be fine.

Please, do not put this man-made ridiculous culture of honour and shaming from people who don't love you above your life.