Is my friend actually a friend?

I have a friend who is very close to me when she is feeling down and fed up, I will support her and we have some pretty deep conversations and spend a lot of time together. She says that she appreciated my calmness and introverted nature.

However when she is feeling better she then spends all of her time with her outgoing friends and tends to ignore me. In fact on occasion she pokes fun at me telling me that I am boring like an old woman. It’s like she goes on this high for weeks where she is too cool for me. Then she will have a breakup or argument with her friend and spend all of her time with me again.

Is she a friend or not?

Reply 1

Old-horse-98

On the face of it she is using you, and isn’t a good friend. But what does she do for you? Does she remember your birthdays? Has she been there you in the past? What positives are there about this person? If there isn’t any, or your struggling to think of any, it’s probably time to let the friendship go

Reply 2

Katerina S.

She's using you in my opinion as an emotional comfort blanket. Possibly there may be something in the way you are perceived by others or not. I would let her know it's a two way street and hold out on her if she is not agreeable. At the moment it sounds like the relationship is agreeable just to her the way she likes it but not to you, I believe it should be both ways but up to you. Possibly your time might be better spent getting to know someone else.