Ocd my mum is messy or am i dramatic. Cant cope

So I live with my mum and my niece stays a lot at my house too. My dad use to stay here but he passed away 3 years ago.
Anyways I’ve realised I starting to have ocd.

I’ve realised my mum is so untidy and it really affects me mentally. I try so much to clean but as soon as she gets into the kitchen or something it gets dirty or messy. Like even washing up if she does it food is sometimes still on there it’s not clean. It makes me sick to my stomach. I keep complaining and they say all I’m doing is nagging and I never use to be like that I use to be the dirty one smh.

Like even the sponge to wash up gets dirty and I hate using it to wash up because of germs and I throw it when she isn’t around and replace it. My mum uses the same pot for oil for other things. She uses the same mug for everything. She uses the same bowls and stuff for everything idk

Would I be so dramatic to have my own bowls plates and forks and spoons and hide them in my room and wash them up with my own sponge. Like I want bowls for my morning yogurt and stuff. But then she using them to wash fruit and veg in it’s disgusting ugh. Would I be dramatic and weird? Like even the sink will be dirty sometimes with bits of food and where u put the plates. Also I’m trying to organise the house so much like get rid of clutter without her around. I don’t want to seem like I’m too much as I don’t pay rent. I realised I’ve got this ocd since my dad passed I saw online it could be part of grieving