Girl issue, who is in the wrong, what do I do?

Hey guys, I'm seeing a girl for a few months now. Basically I asked her out, and a few days before she said she couldn't make it and cancelled ( she ended up going to Glasgow for a week for a wedding ) but she said "you're the first person I'm seeing when I get back". I didn't think too much of it and said no worries.

Last Sunday I asked if she could meet up on Thursday and she said yes she can. The day before ( yesterday) I confirmed if Thursday was good. She then said if we could move to Monday as she was working from home Thursday and the plan was to meet up after work. I was a bit annoyed at this point and said, no worries again but told her I'm busy over the weekend/Monday and said "we'll do another one of the days".

Feel like she's flaked twice now and don't know what to do? We've been dating for 4 months. Other than these scenarios everything else is fine, she texts and call me alot etc.

Any advice, maybe I'm overthinking but as of now, there's no date set lmao

Reply 1

Muttly

It sounds like your friendship is fizzling out. You can talk about it with her but ask yourself 'who is doing all the work to keep your 'relationship' alive?' You have barely got to know one another. A few months or weeks is nothing in a relationship and you might find the interest was there at the start but isn't anymore for what ever reason.

If it is you doing all the running and you end up with a big fat zero return for your efforts then it may well be she is not so interested in you. She is being polite finding other engagements to be committed to, and these appointments in her life are more important. If you leave it and see if she gets in touch see how things are, but go steady if you are becoming 'obsessed' and she is not returning your attention.

In the mean time immerse yourself in every available social event going and just enjoy the moment and the day. Suddenly you might have an encounter and everything changes your whole outlook. What you want is someone who is as crazy about you as you are them. If that happens great but in life it can take a lifetime to find that 100% match. Don't force your efforts just see how things develop.

Reply 2

Admit-One

Universities Forum Helper

To be fair the second reschedule wasn't suitable for you, so may have happened if you were free.

I'd give them one more chance then just leave the balll in their court with regards to meeting up. They're either keen to make it happen or they're not.

Reply 3

Anonymous #2

Hi.
I feel like maybe you should have a chat with her to see if maybe something is going on in her life atm or if things have changed on her part. It’s always better to communicate things. So don’t feel bad to say you feel like you haven’t seen each other in a while and you just want to make sure she’s ok. At least then maybe some things will be clearer for you. Hope it all goes well 🙂

Reply 4

Surnia

My takeaways from this are:

1. Welcome to the real world, where sometimes life gets in the way. I dont see how having to work is 'flaking' on you, but by your argument you then 'flaked' on the Monday. It going to happen, now and in the future, with anyone you are with; accept it.

2. Four months of dating and you're not in a relationship? What's keeping you from becoming official? Have you actually been out on many dates and do you actually know her that well?