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My dad stresses me out so much when driving

I've been driving for about a few months and have had 16 hours of lessons with my instructor with 2 more hours booked before my test in 5 days. My instructor is always so gentle and has a smile on his face when teaching me, and always compliments my driving with stuff like "If this is was your test, you would've passed with flying cololurs". "I could literally be sleeping right now". And it makes me feel better and more relaxed. And of course, I do make small mistakes here and there and the instructor will be like "U went a bit wide there, be careful". I once accidentally scraped the pavement with the alloys quite badly when pulling up on the left side and the instructor smiles and goes "Minor number oneee".
I feel confident that I'll pass in my instructor's car, should be okay unless I do something stupid.

Now, I've also had about 8 hours of practice with my dad as well and hated every bit of it! He gets so shouty and judgy when sitting in the passenger seat that I don't think he'll ever change, even after I pass my test. I'd hate to drive with him sitting in the passenger seat.
Earlier I was coming up to a junction to turn and we were at least a good 20 seconds away from the junction. And he tells me to indicate, I'm like? We're no where near where we need to turn, and he goes "YOU NEED TO INDICATE NOW, THE CORNER IS RIGHT THERE" So I indicated, and the rest of the conversation is before I actually make the turn "If you don't indicate and then slow down, then the driver behind you is gonna honk at u and get mad blah blah, you need to start using ur brain more often......"
I just don't even know what to do, he said he'll take me out tomorrow for the last time before my test.
In fact, he is quite moody and bossy in general and is quite condescending and aggresive in general.
He is a decent enough driver but there have been incidents where he has made mistakes too! And I tell him "Dad car, dad car, and even if he gets honked at, he's like "THAT GUY HAD SO MUCH ROOM, WHY IS HE EVEN HONKING?" When I know he was cut off.
I never try to argue back with my dad cos he's like 6'2 and 130Kgs, and just looks like a scary guy in general.
Even though he was always an angry person, I've only started to get upset so much when sitting in the driver seat with him in the car.

My instructor barely critizes my driving, probably a few helpful comments here and there.
But my dad shouts at me at every single corner. "Why ru turning like this? Stop turning so sharply, etc"
Oh yeah and another thing!

At T junctions, let's say I'm turning right. My instructor has told me not to cut in to the opposite lane coming from the right side when turning, as in, always be on the left side of the lane. This means that I always ensure I stay on the left side, even if it does mean my steering angle has to be sharper. (Align my right mirror with the centreline on the right side - Then turn right)
The same exact incident has happened with my dad, I do what I usually do. And then he shouts at me for drinking so janky, "WHY ARE U GOING SO FAR THEN TURNING?" I tried to explain to him that was what my instructor taught me, but nope, my dad thinks he knows better than my instructor and lectures me still.

One more thing,
I was coming up to a narrow bit on the road where only one car can pass at a time, so I slow down slightly as there is a van approaching on the opposite side, then once I ensured that the van stopped, proceeded safely. But nope, my dad found this wrong, as I was apparently hesitating which would lead to misunderstandings and accidents, apparently I should've accelerated quickly incase the van driver thought I was giving him to way.

I honestly don't think I'll ever get behind the wheel with him in the car in my entire life, I 100% know he isn't gonna change after passing my test. Or I just tell this giant guy to shut up and **** off.

Reply 1

Anonymous #1

This is me the OP again, it's not just that. He goes "Whattt are you doingggg" every 20 seconds for NO REASON, and doesn't even explain what I did wrong. I ask and he just shakes his head...

Reply 2

Anonymous #1

Right, today I was approaching a box junction to turn right. So I come to a halt in the middle of the box with my indicators on and my dad starts shouting "OMG YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO STOP HERE, I'M GONNA GET A TICKET BECAUSE OF YOU". And then the light turns red whilst I was in the middle of the junction, I know that this is normal and I can turn right easily now as the oncoming traffic has a red too. But for some reason my dad's like "OMG IT'S A RED LIGHT WHAT ARE U DOINGG?" Honestly feel like driving with him is gonna make me a worse driver.

Reply 3

Admit-One

Universities Forum Helper

He sounds short tempered and clueless about driving.

I’d tell him that your instructor has recommended that you stick with lessons until your test and that will focus your time on the test format.

If he continues once you’ve passed, I’d wait until he’s driving and then yell “WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!” when he does something innocuous. You can can then tell him that it’s annoying, isn’t it?

Reply 4

Chris2892

Empathise that your dad isn’t a qualified driving instructor, which includes learning the interpersonal skills required to teach people comfortably in that unique setting. That, alongside having someone with limited experience drive your car, is likely somewhat stressful for him.

I’d also suggest you stick to formal lessons with an instructor if you’re struggling with your dad. But also be considerate and thankful that he supported you in learning, regardless of how well it went.