My mom is making me feel like I am crap

I was in depression for over a year, and as a result of depression I didn't do well in my A-levels last year (got BCCD)... I got out of depression and decided to do A-levels properly again, I am giving AS this summer.... So I am losing about 1 academic year...

My family became distant to me after this depression and result thing.. I also complied and stayed to myself and ate alone after everyone was done..
I am used to living alone, so that isn't much of a problem..
Anyways, for the last few days my mom is being very rude to me and making me feel like a total crap...Yesterday after breakfast, I was reading the newspaper and she just walked by muttering 'You are a failure, you don't deserve to stay here, we did everything for you and you pay us like that..." I was totally surprised, I am quite calm in nature and I usually don't shout back or something, so I returned to my room...

Today, my father was supposed to go for a part-time job interview after his regular day job... after lunch I asked my mother if she called dad, she just started shouting at me... "Its all because of you, if you hadn't brought all this trouble, we would have been better off, you just sit and eat, while your father works his life out... [Insert successful relative's name here] got a great job before even he graduated, they moved from remote area of the city, to posh residential area... and it went on"... And as usual I stayed quiet and returned to my room...

I am feeling like total crap now, its as if, the financial troubles of my family are all because of me.. It also sounds like I should earn something but I am a jerk for not doing so.. I am trying to make things better, ain't I?? ...

I got into depression because my parents didn't plan my studies properly and I will be forced to study something I hate after a-levels (I live in a 3rd world country)... I didn't tell them anything then either...
What am I supposed to do?? How can I be successful if I am pursuing a career I hate??

I have no one to talk to, so I am writing this to let my feelings out.. Can you guys tell me what I am supposed to do???

What do you mean 'your parents did plan your studies properly'? Surely its your job to plan your studies...?

People always want somebody else to blame when stuff goes wrong. You blame your parents for your depression and for getting bad results. They blame their financial troubles on you because you didn't do well.

If you were really depressed did you get treatment? Did your parents know you were depressed? Or is it not actually depression and you just felt a bit ****?

My parents were supposed to plan how to pay for university, weren't they??? I want to go to Engineering school which costs about 6000 pounds (for 4 years) but they cannot come up with that kind of money, so I will have to go to commerce school and study accounting which will cast about 2000 pound...And before you say about scholarships, let me tell you there are scholarships that worth about 300 pounds a year..

Actually I don't, if I can help it, my parents are a cause of my depression unless you can tell me a way to earn 6000 pounds easily in a 3rd world country, if there was a way for unqualified students to earn 6000 pounds than it would have been my fault... They are blaming me for financial troubles because people here think children are bound to look after their parents fully after they grow up...So they think I am a failure, I won't get a job and can't look after them..


I took sessions from doctor for depression. My parents don't know about it, people here don't know the difference between insanity and depression....
I was about to go and lie down the railway tracks (I live 5 min walk from railway tracks) after taking sleeping peels, is that proof enough for depression??

Okay, seriously calm down a little bit - I wasn't having a go at you, I was just asking questions.

Firstly, I don't know how it is in your country, but it is bad that your parents haven't planned for paying for university. I can't imagine that - despite knowing my student loan won't cover everything I need to pay for, and my parents are unwilling to pay anything - and they should have done that.

I'm sorry I questioned your depression - but as you say, a lot of people on here don't seem to understand the difference between a rough patch and depression. Maybe you need to let your parents know about your depression? I'm sure that they wouldn't be saying these things if they knew what it would drive you to.

Op, your parents are horrible

But don't feel bad, i failed all of my ASs first time round (and i mean failed, i got 4 Us ) due to family issues, my dad was similar in the fact that he was quite horrible too me and still can be at times.

Just focus on your studies, and don't let them push you into doing something you don't want to do. Are there any international uni's that will take you on?

Good Luck and I'm sure your parents will soon see what a clever and hardworking girl you are.

Actually I am a guy...

International Unis won't take me in, but I am seeing hope with Open University, UK... Lets see what happens..

And thanks for the support...

Apologies

Sorry to hear that, open uni is quite good tho as you can study from home and at your own pace and still get a job to pay for it all...www.open.ac.uk.

And if you want anymore help from me feel free to ask, i'll try my best