Please help, Muslims will probably only understand

....

(edited 7 years ago)

Reply 122

Original post by years101

So you're going to cook and clean for your husband and you won't mind if he doesn't?

Chances are he is a terrible cook anyway... however if he does want to cook for us on occasions that would be lovely.

If your future husband has social media and follows girls and likes their pictures will you be angry?

I would kill him, maybe. He wouldn't be looking at and liking other girls photos again that's for certain.

why do you want to get married? its sunnah yes. Strongly advised to marry if you cannot control your sexual urges but if you cannot fulfil your role (husband or wife) then it becomes haram for you to marry because it will lead to cheating/zina ect.

My "role" is many things, a lot of which can be refined in the nikah. For example the traditional role of the women is to be a housewife, however if we agree in the nikah that I want to work then the logical solution is to hire a maid to clean and do the chores as we both will be a bit tired after we get home from work.

Reply 123

....

(edited 7 years ago)

Reply 124

Original post by years101

LOL you do know men are uncontrollable and if they find another girl attractive so what? I'm sure you find other men attractive but it doesn't mean cheating

Sure, I don't care if he finds someone attractive but if he is liking her photos and eyeballing her and making it public and when he has a wife then there is going to be some serious issues.

You sound like a psycho wife that puts a tracker in your husbands mobile phone

Gotta keep him on a tight leash ya feel me.

Again, In Islam a woman does NOT have to do anything. Why are you going to cook and clean for your husband when you don't need to?

Because it is my duty to make sure he is happy and cooking for him is one way I can please him and not get food poisoning from his terrible cooking.

"Want to work" How can you not want to go out and work and earn your OWN money? would you like to be a housewife?

I'm not sure I understand the question? I am going to university, I want a career therefore I want to work. If you read what I said you'll see that I said I want to work.

Reply 125

.....

(edited 7 years ago)

Reply 126

Original post by years101

How is he going to make you happy?
Are you going to make him happy through cooking, cleaning and sex?

I will make him happy by completing half his deen. I will cook lovely meals for him, raise his children to the best of my ability, provide support for him whenever he needs it, be his best friend, and yes, provide him with sex of course.

Will you marry a guy who is muslim but doesn't work?

No, if he doesn't have a job them he is either lazy or uneducated. If he provides evidence that he is out of work temporarily and he has a high chance of finding a secure job then I will delay the marriage until he is working.

Also if he isn't working then I will have to provide financially and that is not my role, that is his role. He also needs to be earning a decent salary like £30k+ a year or something.

Why do you feel the need to get angry though? Men are like this and you cant go psycho on them for it. If they like a picture so what? its not cheating

because Islam teaches lowering your gaze and being modest, if he has a wife and he is "liking" other girls photos and talking to them then that is not following what islam teaches.

Does it make you insecure?

No, but it makes me think he does not respect what Islam says.

also why do you want to get married? and no answers like "completing half my deen"

I already answered that question :smile:

Reply 127

......

(edited 7 years ago)

Reply 128

mashbbk

18

Original post by years101

"cook lovely meals for him" "provide him with sex" "raise his children" "provide support for him"
You sound like his slave.

You have nothing against him if he doesn't cook/clean or spend time with his children?

No, you never answered the question. I'm asking why do YOU want to get married?
Is it because you dont want to be alone?
You need the affection of a man?
You need to rely on someone?

I don't think so. You would be angry because you seem obsessive and you sound insecure. If you husband doesn't follow every single sunnah are you going to go psycho?

I think you are being way too hard on AishaGirl, everything she seems to say is quite reasonable/normal, you are looking into it too much.

Pretty ill of you to judge her the way you have (I am referring to some of the name calling/labeling you have done).

(edited 7 years ago)

Reply 129

Original post by years101

Judging her? Shut up. I am asking her questions and she is answering them. She seems like a good person with values.

The names I have called her? I said its psychotic and she sounds psychotic. Not that she is. Do I know her? no.

Butt out you scum. Oh and remove your picture, you're ugly

I'll no longer be answering your questions. You are blocked.

Have a nice day.

Reply 130

mashbbk

18

Original post by years101

Judging her? Shut up. I am asking her questions and she is answering them. She seems like a good person with values.

The names I have called her? I said its psychotic and she sounds psychotic. Not that she is. Do I know her? no.

Butt out you scum. Oh and remove your picture, you're ugly

Obsessive, insecure, psycho wife, just a few things you mentioned.

I wonder how people would label you. It can begin with a D or P, and ends with a K. :u:

Have a lovely day.

Reply 131

Anonymous #3

Original post by Sabby888

For?

that if parents are abusive you can cut contact
if youre gona make claims about what islam says then at least provide proof
and plz dont say its common sense
what does abusive mean? Does it mean light beating, a slap, full on beating, causing bruises, broken bones etc ?

Reply 132

Sabby888

16

Original post by Anonymous

that if parents are abusive you can cut contact
if youre gona make claims about what islam says then at least provide proof
and plz dont say its common sense
what does abusive mean? Does it mean light beating, a slap, full on beating, causing bruises, broken bones etc ?

Islam does not support abuse, so logically would not object to someone whom I assume is over 18, as an adult, to cut contact with someone who is

Reply 133

Cherub012

5

Original post by years101

"cook lovely meals for him" "provide him with sex" "raise his children" "provide support for him"
You sound like his slave.

Yes because no wife (Muslim or non-Muslim) does those things.

SMH

Reply 134

Anonymous #3

Original post by Sabby888

Islam does not support abuse, so logically would not object to someone whom I assume is over 18, as an adult, to cut contact with someone who is

i dont want the answer just "logically" i want proof from quran or a respected sheikh.
I hope u understand we cant just claim things without looking into hadith and quran etc coz we might end up saying the wrong things
technically being an adult at 18 is only a western ruling not islamic
and also what about the hadith that says the one who breaks ties wont enter paradise ?

Reply 135

QE2

Original post by Sabby888

Islam does not support abuse

Well, it permits the beating of a disobedient wife (under certain conditions). That is "abuse" in anyone's language.
It also permits slavery and the use of female captives for sex. I can't imagine any civilized person thinking that is not abuse.

So yes, Islam does support abuse.

Reply 136

Original post by QE2

Well, it permits the beating of a disobedient wife (under certain conditions). That is "abuse" in anyone's language.
It also permits slavery and the use of female captives for sex. I can't imagine any civilized person thinking that is not abuse.

So yes, Islam does support abuse.

What was the native africans treated like? In Islam we use no one for our own pleasure so you might would like to check that over.

In terms of beating ones wife you might like to check that too. Its called reprimanding 'mate' not technically beating.

Reply 137

Original post by mariachi

Interesting.

Professor Al Fadl "is Professor of Law at the UCLA School of Law where he teaches Islamic law, Immigration, Human Rights, International and National Security Law. Dr. Abou El Fadl previously taught Islamic law at the University of Texas at Austin Law School, Yale Law School and Princeton University. He holds degrees from Yale University (B.A.), University of Pennsylvania Law School (J.D.) and Princeton University (M.A./Ph.D.) ... he also received formal training in Islamic jurisprudence in Egypt and Kuwait".

While you may of course disagree with him, and criticise his views, dismissing them offhand, and simply calling them "misguiding and improper information" is ridiculous.

By the way, he is not at all in favour of interfaith marriages (especially Muslim wife/non-Muslim husband). He considers them makruh (reprehensible).

Best

You may want to check over the meaning of makruh again.... thats of course if your still interested in Islam? And thats without googling either lets see eh?

Makruh does not mean reprehensible. Its much more simpler than that.

Reply 138

Original post by Anonymous

Well yes, I would like to know why you lot are so intent on encouraging others to suffer throughout their whole lives, even when adhering to dogma is clearly making them deeply unhappy. It's quite concerning that your "wouldn't you like to know" comment implies it's some sort of secret?!

No, there is no evidence for Islam. Erm, it's clear that leaving her boyfriend isn't making the OP happy as she has clearly said in this thread.

If you understood the verse this world is merley a test then it would be worth having a conversation with you.

However seeing as you think you know all about my religion please tell me what Sheikh google is saying?

Reply 139