The Student Room Group

My boyfriend doesn’t make that much effort with my family

Hi,

So I have been with my boyfriend for 2.5 years. I study in the Netherlands and he is Dutch and I’m not from there originally. That means I see a lot more of his parents and family than he has of mind as I rarely go home. Of course there is sometimes a language barrier and I find it hard to connect with his parents occasionally but I do my best regardless. We have also just come out of a long distance relationship and he was invited to join me and my family on holiday. I had a first week with them here and he came the second week which was really great as we hadn’t seen each other in two months.
I know and understand that it’s very difficult to walk into an environment that is very family-intense but my parents have been trying really hard with him. I get he also wants to give me space to enjoy their company and compared to his family they are a lot more open and touchy-feely etc. However, this holiday has been completely supplied for him apart from the flights and I just feel like he hasn’t tried so much to engage with them. I talked with my mum and she said it too but understand that they have differences. It just frustrates me as he doesn’t really put his best foot forward and I’ve had it with friends sometimes too. I love him lots and he takes such good care of me and I find him really fun to be around. My parents just say ‘as long as you’re happy that’s all that matters’ but I just wish there’d been a bit more enthusiasm on his side. Any advice would be great :smile:

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