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My best friend hates me, and I can't even remember what I did watch

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    Basically last weekend me and my friend planned to go out for a drink. I didn't want to go as it was, because I was in a bad mood. But she practically begged me to go out, so I did. The night went as normal until it was time for me to go. I went to get a taxi, as I knew there'd be no taxis if I went later, but she begged me to stay again, promising that she'd get me a ride later.

    We went to this guy's house, and then later came...She refused to get me a lift because she wanted to stay there. From then on, I had this absolute breakdown. I started crying and screaming at her (I didn't remember how it actually started or what I said.) It made me realise how one-sided the friendship is. The night before that I'd followed her around the town, freezing, making sure that she got home okay, even though I'd wanted to go home then. On another night I really wanted to stay out, but she wanted to go, so I'd literally ran with her to catch the train. But I only wanted ONE thing. I've never asked for anything else on a night out. I've always went home when she wanted. I had to go home because I was busy the next day and started college on Monday, and she knew that, but she still refused to live up to her promise.

    To make things worse, we were out with her friends, so they all ganged up on me, too. I've never felt so isolated and alone when out before. Everyone was attacking me, thinking I was the childish one all because I wanted to go home. It always happens. People take her side and love her because she's the beautiful popular one while I'm the ugly quiet one. They don't even know half of what I've done for her.

    I ended up storming out of this house at 4am, with 1% charge on my phone, not knowing where I was, and no one even bothered to check on me or text or anything. They were all so busy making sure that she was okay. I still haven't received any acknowledgement from any of them (not that I expected to.) I could've died, if some nice guy driving a van hadn't helped me with my phone and directions. I still didn't get in until 5am.

    I don't remember what I said barely, or what I did. But the next day she refused to know me and sent this horrible text. I tried to explain that I was drunk and didn't know what I was doing. Now she's acting like I'm this absolutely monstrous *****. I assumed she would understand because one time when she was drunk she punched me, bit a taxi driver, and got arrested, yet I was still there for her. Another time I had to call her mother because she had a massive breakdown. Yet she won't forgive me for ONE drunken breakdown?

    Should I be the one apologising here? I've sent her a load of texts since then, but she's barely replied, and if she does, they're one sentence responses basically saying how much of a ***** I am. I've sent so many texts that I don't want to seem desperate. But what should I do here? We've been friends for a long time, and I really don't want to lose that friendship. But what else can I do other than apologise?

    TLDR; My friend ditched me when we were drunk after promising me a ride. I've always stuck by her, yet she wouldn't stick by me. I said some 'awful' things to her, and now she won't speak to me. I apologised, even though I don't even think that I'm in the wrong. She still isn't speaking.
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    A best-friend would not risk your safety like that. Even if I wanted to stay at the party or whatever, I'd have to make a compromise with you since you're my friend and I asked you to go. I wouldn't try to talk to her or make amends, you shouldn't be apologising, she should. I had two friends do that to me once. We went out, they took me somewhere I didn't want to go but promised they'd take me home and when it got extremely dark, they then decided to go home (which was near where we'd went) and abandoned me in the middle of the night in a foreign place. Friends do not do that. You'll be better off without her.
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    (Original post by EllainKahlo)
    A best-friend would not risk your safety like that. Even if I wanted to stay at the party or whatever, I'd have to make a compromise with you since you're my friend and I asked you to go. I wouldn't try to talk to her or make amends, you shouldn't be apologising, she should. I had two friends do that to me once. We went out, they took me somewhere I didn't want to go but promised they'd take me home and when it got extremely dark, they then decided to go home (which was near where we'd went) and abandoned me in the middle of the night in a foreign place. Friends do not do that. You'll be better off without her.
    I know you're right. I guess I always have, but it's hard to let go of her, and not talk to her, since we've been 'friends' for around 4 years. I just can't stop thinking about the old times we used to have. And I don't like the thought of anyone hating me. She's gone on to block me on Twitter, which is completely pointless, as I now know that she's clearly going to be posting about me. I actually don't understand why she's making a big deal about this, after all of the things I've done for her in the past. She's NEVER apologized to me once, so I'm not counting on it anytime soon.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I know you're right. I guess I always have, but it's hard to let go of her, and not talk to her, since we've been 'friends' for around 4 years. I just can't stop thinking about the old times we used to have. And I don't like the thought of anyone hating me. She's gone on to block me on Twitter, which is completely pointless, as I now know that she's clearly going to be posting about me. I actually don't understand why she's making a big deal about this, after all of the things I've done for her in the past. She's NEVER apologized to me once, so I'm not counting on it anytime soon.
    I wouldn't bother pursing it any further. She's not worth your time anymore :console:
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I know you're right. I guess I always have, but it's hard to let go of her, and not talk to her, since we've been 'friends' for around 4 years. I just can't stop thinking about the old times we used to have. And I don't like the thought of anyone hating me. She's gone on to block me on Twitter, which is completely pointless, as I now know that she's clearly going to be posting about me. I actually don't understand why she's making a big deal about this, after all of the things I've done for her in the past. She's NEVER apologized to me once, so I'm not counting on it anytime soon.
    I don't doubt that it is, it wasn't easy for me to stomach that my 'friends' weren't really people who cared about me. But I learnt from that that I shouldn't be putting so much emphasis on a friendship that isn't even there, it just takes up time you could be using with someone else. I sympathise for you The fact she's never apologised also shows she doesn't respect you.

    Forgetting 4 years of friendship won't happen overnight, but you have to remember you have the right to pick your friends. And you wouldn't pick those character traits, would you? You deserve better than that. A real friend doesn't endanger you and they put your needs on the same level as theirs.
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    If someone treats you like a door mat and you lie down and let them wipe their feet on you, then yes, of course they're going to be shocked when you stand up for yourself. :ahhhhh:

    You should have stood up against her much earlier.
    Refused to go out when you knew it was a bad idea (for you).

    But this is all about habit.
    And for you to break that habit you had to do a bit of shouting.

    She is wrong, but you taught her by your behaviour to take you for granted.
    So you were wrong not to stand up for yourself earlier.

    Don't do it again. :noway:
    If you don't want to go out, don't go out.
    You may have lost a friend, but, boy, has it taught you a good lesson for life.
    (And she doesn't exactly sound a great person to have as a friend anyway - surely you can find someone better.) :unimpressed:
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    Think of it as a lucky escape. If she doesn't want to talk to you anymore, smile and wave goodbye 😀😂
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    She's a *****.
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    (Original post by EllainKahlo)
    I don't doubt that it is, it wasn't easy for me to stomach that my 'friends' weren't really people who cared about me. But I learnt from that that I shouldn't be putting so much emphasis on a friendship that isn't even there, it just takes up time you could be using with someone else. I sympathise for you The fact she's never apologised also shows she doesn't respect you.

    Forgetting 4 years of friendship won't happen overnight, but you have to remember you have the right to pick your friends. And you wouldn't pick those character traits, would you? You deserve better than that. A real friend doesn't endanger you and they put your needs on the same level as theirs.
    I hope you're okay now, and have a solid group of good friends. It's good to know that someone else has been through this awful situation and managed to get through it.

    The thing is, too, that I always doubt myself because no one sees any of this, hence why I always apologise. Everyone makes me out to be the one overreacting, (just because I don't necessarily like staying out until 4, or partying all night at random people's houses), so I start to believe it. They've never had to deal with what I have. It was my first time ever standing up to her, or even arguing back with her. So annoyed with all that she's put me through, and the worse thing she's done, yet she won't forgive me for one incident.


    Thank you so much for the support everyone I wasn't expecting it, considering what I've been through IRL.
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    "Best friend"? You're better off without her!
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I hope you're okay now, and have a solid group of good friends. It's good to know that someone else has been through this awful situation and managed to get through it.

    The thing is, too, that I always doubt myself because no one sees any of this, hence why I always apologise. Everyone makes me out to be the one overreacting, (just because I don't necessarily like staying out until 4, or partying all night at random people's houses), so I start to believe it. They've never had to deal with what I have. It was my first time ever standing up to her, or even arguing back with her. So annoyed with all that she's put me through, and the worse thing she's done, yet she won't forgive me for one incident.

    Thank you so much for the support everyone I wasn't expecting it, considering what I've been through IRL.
    Thanks, you'll get through this. Not all friends last forever, and there's a reason for that. You outgrow them and just need to move on and take it as a learning experience so it never happens again. No real friend would have left me at 14, at night in a foreign place outside their house while they go about their business. And you don't need to put up with that childishness either, because as silly as it is, it's also dangerous.

    It sounds like you need better friends. I have friends now who respect my personal choices i.e. one of my friends is a party animal but she doesn't make me feel guilty for not wanting to go with her and drink and smoke and go clubbing because we understand our different needs and wants. Only a selfish person will say that should do whatever it is they do. You'll be fine without her I promise.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Basically last weekend me and my friend planned to go out for a drink. I didn't want to go as it was, because I was in a bad mood. But she practically begged me to go out, so I did. The night went as normal until it was time for me to go. I went to get a taxi, as I knew there'd be no taxis if I went later, but she begged me to stay again, promising that she'd get me a ride later.

    We went to this guy's house, and then later came...She refused to get me a lift because she wanted to stay there. From then on, I had this absolute breakdown. I started crying and screaming at her (I didn't remember how it actually started or what I said.) It made me realise how one-sided the friendship is. The night before that I'd followed her around the town, freezing, making sure that she got home okay, even though I'd wanted to go home then. On another night I really wanted to stay out, but she wanted to go, so I'd literally ran with her to catch the train. But I only wanted ONE thing. I've never asked for anything else on a night out. I've always went home when she wanted. I had to go home because I was busy the next day and started college on Monday, and she knew that, but she still refused to live up to her promise.

    To make things worse, we were out with her friends, so they all ganged up on me, too. I've never felt so isolated and alone when out before. Everyone was attacking me, thinking I was the childish one all because I wanted to go home. It always happens. People take her side and love her because she's the beautiful popular one while I'm the ugly quiet one. They don't even know half of what I've done for her.

    I ended up storming out of this house at 4am, with 1% charge on my phone, not knowing where I was, and no one even bothered to check on me or text or anything. They were all so busy making sure that she was okay. I still haven't received any acknowledgement from any of them (not that I expected to.) I could've died, if some nice guy driving a van hadn't helped me with my phone and directions. I still didn't get in until 5am.

    I don't remember what I said barely, or what I did. But the next day she refused to know me and sent this horrible text. I tried to explain that I was drunk and didn't know what I was doing. Now she's acting like I'm this absolutely monstrous *****. I assumed she would understand because one time when she was drunk she punched me, bit a taxi driver, and got arrested, yet I was still there for her. Another time I had to call her mother because she had a massive breakdown. Yet she won't forgive me for ONE drunken breakdown?

    Should I be the one apologising here? I've sent her a load of texts since then, but she's barely replied, and if she does, they're one sentence responses basically saying how much of a ***** I am. I've sent so many texts that I don't want to seem desperate. But what should I do here? We've been friends for a long time, and I really don't want to lose that friendship. But what else can I do other than apologise?

    TLDR; My friend ditched me when we were drunk after promising me a ride. I've always stuck by her, yet she wouldn't stick by me. I said some 'awful' things to her, and now she won't speak to me. I apologised, even though I don't even think that I'm in the wrong. She still isn't speaking.
    Me and my friend are having issues over something we shouldn't even be arguing over. We mostly like the same bands (The Vamps, 5sos etc) and we were really close. A couple of years ago I went through a phase where I really loved one direction. I still like them now but as proved twice they've wrecked two friendships for me. My friend got tickets to see one direction (concert last week) and invited me to go, I asked my parents and they were OK. At the start of July I got grounded and the punishment was I couldn't go to the concert, I told my friend and she was fine, really understanding about it One of her other friends saw a tweet I'd put on defending the vamps, going against one direction (but that's what you do when you like a band) and she went to my friend and told her I didn't like one direction (I didn't even say that). And? She stuck up for her FRIEND, she didn't even want to hear my side of the story. I DMed her to apologise and she's still ignoring me now. I know this is pathetic and I'm sorry but we've been friends for ages :/

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    I don't think people who leave their friends on a night out are people you can call friends. That is so not cool and really unsafe. You go out together and you should remain together unless you guys have good arrangements and decided to part ways. Sorry to say but your friend has no reason to throw a fit, you do.
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    (Original post by thevamps99xo)
    Me and my friend are having issues over something we shouldn't even be arguing over. We mostly like the same bands (The Vamps, 5sos etc) and we were really close. A couple of years ago I went through a phase where I really loved one direction. I still like them now but as proved twice they've wrecked two friendships for me. My friend got tickets to see one direction (concert last week) and invited me to go, I asked my parents and they were OK. At the start of July I got grounded and the punishment was I couldn't go to the concert, I told my friend and she was fine, really understanding about it One of her other friends saw a tweet I'd put on defending the vamps, going against one direction (but that's what you do when you like a band) and she went to my friend and told her I didn't like one direction (I didn't even say that). And? She stuck up for her FRIEND, she didn't even want to hear my side of the story. I DMed her to apologise and she's still ignoring me now. I know this is pathetic and I'm sorry but we've been friends for ages :/

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    Aw, I'm sure it will work out. How long have has it been since you've spoken? If it's only been a few days, I'm sure she'll reply soon. It's only a band, after all I'm sure your friendship means more.
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    I love the support on here, but everyone makes me doubt myself IRL they all take her side and act like I'm the one that's in the wrong. Like on that night, they were all saying I was pathetic and childish just because I wanted to go home. It has honestly been one of the worst nights of my life
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Aw, I'm sure it will work out. How long have has it been since you've spoken? If it's only been a few days, I'm sure she'll reply soon. It's only a band, after all I'm sure your friendship means more.
    A proper conversation? A few weeks ago I'm probably just worrying about nothing, as I always do

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    (Original post by thevamps99xo)
    A proper conversation? A few weeks ago I'm probably just worrying about nothing, as I always do

    Posted from TSR Mobile
    Yeah, I can assure you it will be fine but I always worry about stuff, too, so I can't really comment haha
 
 
 
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