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Was I unreasonable not to trust her and keep calling her out?

There was this ex who came back into my life in the Spring, we agreed we both still wanted it to work out, so started talking again (it was long distance at the time, but I had planned to move out there). Things were going well, then all of a sudden she got shady, e.g. tell me she is off to bed, then pop back on facebook an hour later, maybe send me a message saying something like 'watching a video stream'. All this time her ex still had the old profile picture of them together, he was still in a relationship, her's was hidden. Any time I questioned it she had some answer and I trusted it.

Then one day I finish work to listen to a message about how she changed her mind and isn't ready for a relationship. She got even shadier after that, he relationship said she was with the same guy, I asked her and she said it was bc he would get mad if she changed to to single as she didn't want his family to ask questions about the break up (it was about a month and half before!).

Anyway, she came back again a few weeks ago saying I was right that she shouldn't waste time with her ex (she said the broke up 6 weeks before), we got talking again, and I was over everything that happened before, and because I had plans to move out there next month, we started talking about meeting up when I did.

One thing I noticed she had recently accepted her ex's friend request on facebook (she made a new account). Ofc, it said he was in a relationship, same pic...ok I think, maybe he doesn't update it much. Then she began to act funny, said she's go to bed, come back online hours later, she'd text me with German words to say why she was online again (she forgot to change the auto-language), her ex was German. Things just became too much like before for me, and although I was over it, I wasn't going to forget it and make the same mistake twice. So we got into an argument about it, she kept blaming me for being unreasonable and overthinking, getting really mad that I'd essentially be calling her a liar.

Looking back, I was, regardless of what she was doing, I should have just ignored her actions. In the end, I apologised for how I behaved, told her there was too much damage and blocked her.

Was I being unreasonable considering this recent history?

Reply 1

BoredOfYou

To be honest if it were me I would think that something's going on as well but I'm not in ur gf's position so I cant say for sure that there's something going on. We could argue all night long on whether it's u not trusting ur gf or there's something going on. But for me, I'd probably doubt her if it happened to me.