Day 3 27.09.18:
Morning
Not sure how disappointing I should be in myself, but I basically ended up doing nothing useful in the morning. I wanted to wake up at 8.30 am but my body resisted. It was most likely because I had went to sleep at 2am the last two days. Late nights have consequences... don't let them tell you otherwise.
Afternoon
Made it to university on time (about 10 mins early) for my 2pm Games and Strategies lecture. Lecture room was packed out for whatever reason (most likely as it was the first lecture) and we had that lecture. Interestingly, I noticed from the lecturer's cv he speaks hindi (even though he looks white and has an American accent!) so that might be something I ask him about, if there's a chance. And yes, the lecturer is a guy for this module, it's not just me being a lazy shiz. The lecture was clearly entertaining as my attention was held and we didn't even have a break of 10 mins about an hour in, which is the standard of most 2 hour lectures allegedly. The highlight of the lecture was a person getting kicked out for talking by the lecturer. Ouch.
Evening
Came back home and felt tired. Then again, I didn't manage to eat my lunch on time as I didn't feel hungry before 2pm, so my lunch was postponed to after my lecture... 4.30! Maybe that had something to do with it. Anyway, since I have a 3 day week and today was the last day of that 3 day week I decided to chill. Although I know from next week onwards... well, I probably shouldn't be chilling. Anyway, I was just watching TV, and de-stressing so I thought.
When the fun stops, stop (18+)
Well, I don't really know if it's appropriate or not for me to mention gambling, as it's a dangerous thing for anyone to get into. I've thought myself to be quite intelligent and sensible but gambling has had a serious impact on my mental health and stress throughout 1st year. I'd cut it down during the exams but now the temptation is coming back again (as I have free time). I've been gambling since I turned 18 (online as I'd be mortified to walk into a bookies shop as there are a lot of shady looking people who go in there, or so the stigma states). The real truth is I entered gambling under the guise of "Matched betting", something claimed as a tax-free income for anyone really. I thought great, I can do that. Yet, I've suffered through addiction and the world of social media "tipsters" and whatnot, and as you can expect, I've lost money. Arguably, it might have cost me my "scholarship" from 1st year being carried on. The point to note is the negative consequences of gambling are endless but the positives are most definitely finite and most likely for yourself. The real truth (which I've never disclosed before) is that I want to prove that I can do it. That I can make a profit and have spare money, to do whatever really. But the reality is that I started off with £1k and now probably have £150. It's no longer an excuse that I don't know what to do. It's that I lack the discipline to not gamble, or gamble sensibly. The thing is, I'm probably best off cutting off gambling completely. But I feel a strong desire to win and won't stop till I do. The one and only point I'm proud of about myself is the fact that I've kept that £1k and now what's left in a "separate" account so it does not affect my actual savings or daily lifestyle spending decisions. It's isolated. And, the one and only thing, I really must ensure is I never move or put a penny more into gambling than what is in that account. To my parents, that £1k is lost to gambling. In reality, there is a certainty I can turn it around , however, it all relies on me, myself and I. So the pro and con is that it is all up to me if I succeed or fail.
If anyone wants any advice or wants to talk anonymously on the topic of gambling or has any questions, I'm here. I'm glad to have got this off my chest.