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Cancer Support Society

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Original post by Anonymous
Does anyone know how to cope with the loss of a loved one? My Nan died of cancer earlier on in the year who I was quite close to, and although I certainly feel better, I still think about it from time to time and feel upset. Anyone have any advice? Would be helpful .. x


I lost my grandad just over 10 years ago and I still get upset sometimes when I think about it/him. If it doesn't affect your day to day life too much on a regular basis, I think it's normal to feel like that
Original post by Anonymous
Does anyone know how to cope with the loss of a loved one? My Nan died of cancer earlier on in the year who I was quite close to, and although I certainly feel better, I still think about it from time to time and feel upset. Anyone have any advice? Would be helpful .. x


I definitely think it's normal to still feel upset sometimes. But if you feel it's affecting your day to day life significantly, have you had/considered bereavement counselling?
Reply 42
My uncle passed away to cancer a year ago it was a terrible 2 months I never got to see him at the hospital before he died. It's really a serious thing that affects many.
Original post by 0lut0
My uncle passed away to cancer a year ago it was a terrible 2 months I never got to see him at the hospital before he died. It's really a serious thing that affects many.


I’m really sorry to hear about your uncle :hugs:
Cancer Support Community National Office. As the largest professionally led nonprofit network of cancer support worldwide, the Cancer Support Community(CSC) is dedicated to ensuring that all people impacted by cancer are empowered by knowledge, strengthened by action and sustained by community. ... impacted bycancer.
Oh, I meant to post an update on here. So at the end of July my mum had her annual mammogram and it came back as fine! Cancer free still. So glad. Was so worried!
Original post by Pathway
Oh, I meant to post an update on here. So at the end of July my mum had her annual mammogram and it came back as fine! Cancer free still. So glad. Was so worried!


That’s amazing news, really pleased to hear that! :hugs:
Original post by shadowdweller
That’s amazing news, really pleased to hear that! :hugs:


We were too. She had a scare last year after her mammogram so I was really anxious it'd come back this year, but it didn't. :redface: Hopefully it never does!
Original post by Pathway
We were too. She had a scare last year after her mammogram so I was really anxious it'd come back this year, but it didn't. :redface: Hopefully it never does!


That must have been really horrible for you all :redface: I hope that the good news continues for her, and for you :smile:
Original post by Anonymous
Healthy as in going the gym daily with six packs and and stuff? even if theyre eating animal products theyre unhealthy loads of them end up dropping dead at 40 or 50 because of heart disease, charities are a buisness the owners make millions and mainly all of them are sponsered and given money by meat an dairy industry which products are proven to cause cancer 🤔 people with serious cancer have went plant based and got rid of the cancer all together so clearly these "charitys" arnt doing their job.

Hi, as an ex-"serious" cancer patient, I have problems with this viewpoint. As a teenanger, there is nothing I could have done to prevent my cancer. It is a random event, it doesn't have a specific cause, just risk factors. Meat and dairy aren't the causes of cancer. They may be risk factors, but so are most things. Toast is a risk factor. I personally have things I don't like about cancer charities, but they have made some great breakthroughs over the years, survival has increased significantly and I myself have benefited from a new drug. Also, plant based diets can't get rid of cancer. A good vegetarian/vegan diet can improve health, but there is no good peer-assesed research proving that they help get rid of cancer. This sort of stuff can convince people not to get life saving chemo, and although it is not a nice treatment, it saves lives, including my own.
Original post by shadowdweller
Nearly 40% of people will be diagnosed with cancer at some point in their lives, and even more of us will be affected by it indirectly, be it through friends or family. Whether you have cancer yourself, or someone close to you does, it can be an incredibly difficult thing to go through, especially if you don't have anyone around you that fully understands what you're dealing with.

So whether you want to talk, advise, or even just vent, this thread is here as a channel to discuss things in, and to find support if you need it.

Looking for support or guidance?
[ul]
[li]Contact Macmillan on 0808 808 00 00, or email them here. You can also find support groups in your local area.[/li]
[li]Cancer Research UK also lists a number of different support organisations and their contact details here.[/li]
[/ul]

I work in bowel cancer. Any information, support, advice etc. Ask me . I am a senior nurse and been doing this job for a long time.
Cancer terrifies me. I've known a 17yo to die of cancer (mum's best friend's son), my partner's best friend, my grandmother, my other grandmother has had ovarian cancer (fine now!) and my grandad has had skin cancer and throat cancer (both fully recovered from). It feels like I see posts on Facebook about people being diagnosed all the time, and it just scares me because some of these people live such healthy lives, and it just makes me think can we really avoid it?

I sort of assume that I'm going to get it some day. I don't know if that's a pessimistic view, it's just that there's a lot of it in my family, particularly on my dad's side. I hate that it takes so many people, and that so many others are affected through it.

I wish it was go away, and I'm very very proud that my cousin is involved in some groundbreaking research in Liverpool.
Original post by xoxAngel_Kxox
Cancer terrifies me. I've known a 17yo to die of cancer (mum's best friend's son), my partner's best friend, my grandmother, my other grandmother has had ovarian cancer (fine now!) and my grandad has had skin cancer and throat cancer (both fully recovered from). It feels like I see posts on Facebook about people being diagnosed all the time, and it just scares me because some of these people live such healthy lives, and it just makes me think can we really avoid it?

I sort of assume that I'm going to get it some day. I don't know if that's a pessimistic view, it's just that there's a lot of it in my family, particularly on my dad's side. I hate that it takes so many people, and that so many others are affected through it.

I wish it was go away, and I'm very very proud that my cousin is involved in some groundbreaking research in Liverpool.

All cancers are curable if you catch them soon enough. Skin cancer is caused largely by exposure to sun. Look for moles that bleed or are odd looking. Throat cancer probably a smoker. Lung cancer ditto. The nhs offers loads of screening but you just need to be aware of any changes.... however small. Your GP will not mind if you bug him/her. It is cheaper to head these things off veforehand
Original post by squeakysquirrel
All cancers are curable if you catch them soon enough. Skin cancer is caused largely by exposure to sun. Look for moles that bleed or are odd looking. Throat cancer probably a smoker. Lung cancer ditto. The nhs offers loads of screening but you just need to be aware of any changes.... however small. Your GP will not mind if you bug him/her. It is cheaper to head these things off veforehand


Can't argue with the skin cancer being because of the sun, but neither were smokers so that's not what caused the throat or lung cancer. That's one of the other things that scares me.. you can try and be as healthy as you like, but there still seems to be a lot of randomness with it too. And I also think it's hard to see the symptoms early enough sometimes. If they were all so easy to catch, nobody would die of it.
My mum passed away earlier this year from lung cancer just three weeks after she was diagnosed. I got special circumstances for my exams and everything and I’ve got the grades to get into my first choice uni so I’m not worried about that. I just don’t think I’ll ever be as happy again. I’m just as sad as I was a few months ago but in different ways. I’m struggling to find motivation at school and I cry about one thing or another everyday. I try and hide the fact that I haven’t got much better from my friends and teachers but I want to talk to someone just to get it off my chest. I’d prefer talking with someone face to face so do you think my guidance teacher will have time to speak to me? Or would it be best to see a therapist? I don’t like speaking to my dad about things because I don t want to upset him, but I wouldn’t mind speaking to some of my friends. Who do you think would be best to talk with?
I also find it hard dealing with the assumptions people make about my mum dying of lung cancer because she never ever smoked and she never drank alcohol and she was active. So if anyone has any advice about that too then that would be helpful.
Original post by Anonymous
My mum passed away earlier this year from lung cancer just three weeks after she was diagnosed. I got special circumstances for my exams and everything and I’ve got the grades to get into my first choice uni so I’m not worried about that. I just don’t think I’ll ever be as happy again. I’m just as sad as I was a few months ago but in different ways. I’m struggling to find motivation at school and I cry about one thing or another everyday. I try and hide the fact that I haven’t got much better from my friends and teachers but I want to talk to someone just to get it off my chest. I’d prefer talking with someone face to face so do you think my guidance teacher will have time to speak to me? Or would it be best to see a therapist? I don’t like speaking to my dad about things because I don t want to upset him, but I wouldn’t mind speaking to some of my friends. Who do you think would be best to talk with?

I definitely think it's a good idea to talk to someone - someone at school may be able to direct you to a counselling service that can help or there may be someone in school who you can speak to. I'm really sorry this has happened to you.

The fact is that anyone can get cancer- those things you mention do increase your chances it's true, but no one is immune to anything. One of my friend's mums died of lung cancer too and she was the same so it may be less common but it definitely does happen
Original post by Anonymous
My mum passed away earlier this year from lung cancer just three weeks after she was diagnosed. I got special circumstances for my exams and everything and I’ve got the grades to get into my first choice uni so I’m not worried about that. I just don’t think I’ll ever be as happy again. I’m just as sad as I was a few months ago but in different ways. I’m struggling to find motivation at school and I cry about one thing or another everyday. I try and hide the fact that I haven’t got much better from my friends and teachers but I want to talk to someone just to get it off my chest. I’d prefer talking with someone face to face so do you think my guidance teacher will have time to speak to me? Or would it be best to see a therapist? I don’t like speaking to my dad about things because I don t want to upset him, but I wouldn’t mind speaking to some of my friends. Who do you think would be best to talk with?

All of them.
Original post by Anonymous
My mum passed away earlier this year from lung cancer just three weeks after she was diagnosed. I got special circumstances for my exams and everything and I’ve got the grades to get into my first choice uni so I’m not worried about that. I just don’t think I’ll ever be as happy again. I’m just as sad as I was a few months ago but in different ways. I’m struggling to find motivation at school and I cry about one thing or another everyday. I try and hide the fact that I haven’t got much better from my friends and teachers but I want to talk to someone just to get it off my chest. I’d prefer talking with someone face to face so do you think my guidance teacher will have time to speak to me? Or would it be best to see a therapist? I don’t like speaking to my dad about things because I don t want to upset him, but I wouldn’t mind speaking to some of my friends. Who do you think would be best to talk with?

I think talk to all of them, really! Your teachers need to be aware if you’re finding things difficult so they can offer extra support if you need, and the guidance teacher would be able to help with that.

A therapist sounds like it might be useful to help you with coping strategies, and help you deal with the motivation issues you mentioned too, I think it would be sensible to talk to one.

I know it might feel like you’d be upsetting your dad, but I’m sure he’d want to know how you’re feeling, and it would likely benefit him to talk about things too. Likewise your friends would be happy to talk when you need it too, I’m sure!
Original post by Anonymous
I also find it hard dealing with the assumptions people make about my mum dying of lung cancer because she never ever smoked and she never drank alcohol and she was active. So if anyone has any advice about that too then that would be helpful.

I think this likely stems from ignorance - possibly it’s worth explaining this to people outwardly assuming?
my mum was diagnosed with bowel cancer on motheres day she has had her operation and has just finished her chemo early, shes having a checkup to see if its gone in janurary

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