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did I cheat?

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it is cheating, you only had your closure afterwards if any. i ain't defending your ex for the way he treated you, but best thing was to get that guy's no. and **** him a day later if you really wanted to after you broke up with your ex in person and not via a quick text in the bathroom lol who you've been with for 2 years.
Youre both did *****y things tbh
Reply 22
Original post by Anonymous
okay so a few days I was at a club drinking and hanging out with friends. just to say me and my boyfriend have had issues for the past 4 months and I always contemplated breaking up with him but I always give him a chance even when he treats me real bad (I'm not gonna say what he does but let's just say it is real BAD) we have been together for 2 years btw

anyway the other day I was speaking to this guy and I was very sexually attracted to him and he was attracted to me too. we were just talking. before we did anything I just went to the bathroom and texted my boyfriend and told him it was over but he hadn't replied at that minute and he didn't see it either anyway I came back the chat continued with the guy and we had sex.

tbh I didn't feel bad at all. I enjoyed my self. but anyway I gave the guy my number. i came back home and my ex boyfriend was asking me why did I break up with him blah blah.i told him my reasons and kicked him out.

now is this considered cheating? coz after a minute of telling my boyfriend it's over,over text which he didn't see I had sex with another guy. thoughts?.. (btw Im not intending on telling my ex I had sex with another guy it's none of his business)


no, breaking up over text isn't the nicest thing to do but it sound like he has been *****y to you. you're gonna get judgemental replies for that unless you say what he did but no one's opinion on you really matters here. it sounds like it has been long time coming and it's not really his business.
Your game, your play.

Sounds like he was a d*** towards you so you had every right to dump him.

You probably felt tired of his behaviour so I don't blame you mate.
Reply 24
Original post by huvaxshatra
if it is not cheating what is?


exactly, she met someone while in a relationship with the intention of getting to know him sexually. Sending a text message before doing the act is neither here or there.
Original post by Anonymous
okay so a few days I was at a club drinking and hanging out with friends. just to say me and my boyfriend have had issues for the past 4 months and I always contemplated breaking up with him but I always give him a chance even when he treats me real bad (I'm not gonna say what he does but let's just say it is real BAD) we have been together for 2 years btw

anyway the other day I was speaking to this guy and I was very sexually attracted to him and he was attracted to me too. we were just talking. before we did anything I just went to the bathroom and texted my boyfriend and told him it was over but he hadn't replied at that minute and he didn't see it either anyway I came back the chat continued with the guy and we had sex.

tbh I didn't feel bad at all. I enjoyed my self. but anyway I gave the guy my number. i came back home and my ex boyfriend was asking me why did I break up with him blah blah.i told him my reasons and kicked him out.

now is this considered cheating? coz after a minute of telling my boyfriend it's over,over text which he didn't see I had sex with another guy. thoughts?.. (btw Im not intending on telling my ex I had sex with another guy it's none of his business)


THOT
No because you told him it was over. If you hadn't texted him then yes, that would be cheating, but you broke it off first.
(edited 6 years ago)
Why do you care if you cheated on him or not? The fact that you broke up with him over text clearly demonstrates that you didn't give a crap about him either way. You didn't even offer an explanation for why you broke up with him. Then again I supposed not many people have the honesty to write 'I'm dumping you right now because I want to **** this guy I just met at this club.'
Original post by Anonymous
so it's my fault he beat me up and cheated on me? no wonder many victims of domestic violence don't come out and tell anyone. its because of people with a mindset like yours. victims are a coward in your eyes yeah?. Do yourself and the world a favour and go educate yourself. (you are again jumping to conclusion without knowing the full story)


How typical, you let yourself to be abused and then blame others for pointing that out.
You need a safe space, because words hurt, but when a person with whom you are with beats you is okay - "he will change and next time he won't lift a finger ", because he said so!? You get what you get.
Domestic abuse victims are cowards because they don't stand up and they let that happen again and again, you did not stand up and stayed with him despite he beat you and cheated. On top of that you run out with someone else then "texted that you are leaving him" and slept with another one, then went home, like nothing happened, and because you slept with another guy you received superpowers to be able to throw that scumbag out of your apartment.
If this is all true you are a coward who was charged with enlightenment while having a sex or this story is such a BS that nothing adds up.
Original post by Anonymous
okay so a few days I was at a club drinking and hanging out with friends. just to say me and my boyfriend have had issues for the past 4 months and I always contemplated breaking up with him but I always give him a chance even when he treats me real bad (I'm not gonna say what he does but let's just say it is real BAD) we have been together for 2 years btw

anyway the other day I was speaking to this guy and I was very sexually attracted to him and he was attracted to me too. we were just talking. before we did anything I just went to the bathroom and texted my boyfriend and told him it was over but he hadn't replied at that minute and he didn't see it either anyway I came back the chat continued with the guy and we had sex.

tbh I didn't feel bad at all. I enjoyed my self. but anyway I gave the guy my number. i came back home and my ex boyfriend was asking me why did I break up with him blah blah.i told him my reasons and kicked him out.

now is this considered cheating? coz after a minute of telling my boyfriend it's over,over text which he didn't see I had sex with another guy. thoughts?.. (btw Im not intending on telling my ex I had sex with another guy it's none of his business)


Doing it over TEXT?! Real Brave. I think it's called slut
Reply 30
Original post by kydzoster
How typical, you let yourself to be abused and then blame others for pointing that out.
You need a safe space, because words hurt, but when a person with whom you are with beats you is okay - "he will change and next time he won't lift a finger ", because he said so!? You get what you get.
Domestic abuse victims are cowards because they don't stand up and they let that happen again and again, you did not stand up and stayed with him despite he beat you and cheated. On top of that you run out with someone else then "texted that you are leaving him" and slept with another one, then went home, like nothing happened, and because you slept with another guy you received superpowers to be able to throw that scumbag out of your apartment.
If this is all true you are a coward who was charged with enlightenment while having a sex or this story is such a BS that nothing adds up.


Clearly coming from someone who has never been genuinely fearful of their safety & life from another person they have to be around 24/7. Get your head out of your ass, tw*t. I hope neither you, nor anyone you hold dear, is ever abused, because no doubt there will be someone like you out there who shuns them out of ever getting help and resolving the situation.

To those judging OP for breaking up via text: same to you. Unless you have been scared of someone in that way, you have no idea the guts it takes to walk away, and often indirectly is the safest route. In a situation where the relationship wasn't such a trainwreck then yeah, breaking up via text and then immediately screwing someone else is a *****y thing to do, but that is not this case.

To OP: no, you didn't cheat. But why do you care? The guy sounds like an a-hole, and he apparently didn't care whether he cheated on you. Two wrongs don't make a right, but I imagine hypothetical infidelity is hardly your biggest concern right now. Good on you for finally breaking up with him, and good luck.
(edited 6 years ago)
I think so
Original post by apeshit007
Doing it over TEXT?! Real Brave. I think it's called slut


Exactly!! #sorrynotsorry
Original post by Anonymous

tbh I didn't feel bad at all. I enjoyed my self. but anyway I gave the guy my number. i came back home and my ex boyfriend was asking me why did I break up with him blah blah.i told him my reasons and kicked him out.


Original post by Anonymous
highly possible I was treating him badly? what makes you say that Sherlock? i know i said i wouldn't say what he has done but he did beat me up and cheat on me multiple times however I haven't done that. EVER. don't jump to conclusions when you don't know the full story. pfft.


I'm sorry if I'm incorrect, however I find this EXTREMELY hard to believe.

People in these types of relationships are usually too scared to even consider talking (or even making eye contact) with another man, let alone dump the abuser and personally escort them out the house???

Your behaviour just doesn't tie up with the accusations you have made...

I'm not saying he was a good boyfriend, however far too many ex's play the blame game nowadays to cover up their own transgressions.
Even if it was cheating in some people's opinion, does it matter now that you've broken up?
@qasim_96 @elforjg02 @ClearSky y'all thought that some women on a Student forum would have some sort of goody two shoes oxbridge complex with integrity but don't judge a book by it's cover boyz
Original post by AryanGh
@qasim_96 @elforjg02 @ClearSky y'all thought that some women on a Student forum would have some sort of goody two shoes oxbridge complex with integrity but don't judge a book by it's cover boyz

Once you actually find out what they're really like you find out that it's actually the total opposite.
Original post by qasim_96
Once you actually find out what they're really like you find out that it's actually the total opposite.


Integrity is so 2008 be real
i wouldn't consider it cheating because you had already broken up with him. But I would say you had been leading him on if you'd been long considering breaking up with him, and the only reason you did it then was because you had another option in front of you.
Original post by Scitty
Clearly coming from someone who has never been genuinely fearful of their safety & life from another person they have to be around 24/7. Get your head out of your ass, tw*t. I hope neither you, nor anyone you hold dear, is ever abused, because no doubt there will be someone like you out there who shuns them out of ever getting help and resolving the situation.

To those judging OP for breaking up via text: same to you. Unless you have been scared of someone in that way, you have no idea the guts it takes to walk away, and often indirectly is the safest route. In a situation where the relationship wasn't such a trainwreck then yeah, breaking up via text and then immediately screwing someone else is a *****y thing to do, but that is not this case.

To OP: no, you didn't cheat. But why do you care? The guy sounds like an a-hole, and he apparently didn't care whether he cheated on you. Two wrongs don't make a right, but I imagine hypothetical infidelity is hardly your biggest concern right now. Good on you for finally breaking up with him, and good luck.


There are sheep and there are wolfs, and then there are German Shepards.
Not all millennials are brainwashed but those who are, are programmed to be weak, pathetic. You are not able to live on your own and make your own choices. People used to fix things and invest time in the relationships, nowadays this knowledge has been disregarded, why fix when you can have a new one, why work on it if you can request a new one.
Everything is entitled, no need to work hard, just drop on your knees and it will be given. This kind of mindset drags you down, makes you a sheep, makes you a victim.
There are some who can stand up for their rights, for the right reasons, for the right cause. On the first trigger, smallest abuse they stand up for themselves, they do not allow to be pushed around. They learn their own mistakes and try to understand why they are attracted to abusive partners, they learn to notice them and avoid them, but not victims, they know its bad, and they desire to be abused. That is their mindset, their secret desire. People love to be fooled/cheated and pushed around. Those who disagree are lying to themselves. We all love that to some level. Some more and some less.

Who are you, a sheep or a wolf?

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