Mental health-someone talk I talk to !

Hi Georgia. I’m not sure if this is a mental health problem but I feel a deep hatred towards my family. They are not bad people they just don’t understand me and don’t try to. A lot of the time I pretend to like them so they can keep giving me stuff but that’s a lot of effort. I’ve already given up on pretending with my siblings because there’s no point. I am constantly angry at my siblings and hate them. It’s not even for anything in particular I think I’ve just been growing my hatred for them for everything wrong they’ve ever done to me. As you can tell I tend to keep grudges.
I also really hate my parents. I come from a Muslim family and I don’t really like being Muslim because of all the rules. Ramadan is also the worst because fasting becomes a competition with my sibling and for some reason I always try to win although I cheat eat.
My mother is not a nice person she is rude and talks behind people’s backs and I just really hate her
My Father is a stupid, religious person and I just hate that about him.
I’m not sure I can keep on pretending I like them.
Sometimes I think I should love my family but I don’t even feel a little bit of love towards even though they’ve given me everything. Is this normal?
I want to stop holding grudges but I’m not sure I can ever truly forgive them. I’m not even sure what I am forgiving tbh.

Sorry to just dump all of this on you. You don’t have to answer if you don’t want to. It was nice just writing and posting this.

Hiya if anyone wants any advice or just someone to listen revolving around mental health id be more than happy to help!

for starters..I have faith in you!
do they both know the extent of your problem and how much it’s affecting you and have you spoken about alternative medication?